JE/NewS/KAT-TUN- "JE is Not the Same as the Real World For KAT-TUN Too"

Jul 17, 2007 22:07

Title: JE is Not the Same as the Real World For KAT-TUN Too
Universe: JE/KAT-TUN/NewS
Theme/Topic: N/A
Rating: PG-13
Character/Pairing/s: KAT-TUN, NewS
Warnings/Spoilers: Crack? OOC? Stupidity? THESE PEOPLE REALLY EXIST OH GOD.
Word Count: 2,448
Summary: Sequel to “JE is Not the Same as the Real World”- KAT-TUN is not much better off.
Dedication: Ann again, thanks for sending me the article translation!
A/N: Haha it seems I get horrible writer’s block until Ann link-spams me into finding inspiration. I HAVE TRUE FRIENDS. And I will also never finish my script if this keeps up. LOL Also sorry if this reads awkward, my brain only seems to want to work in short spurts today. -_-;;
Disclaimer: Not mine, though I wish constantly.
Distribution: Just lemme know.



1. Traveling Abroad

Yamapi looks vaguely misty eyed as he clings to Jin after he finishes reading the article. Tegoshi does the same, even though he and Jin are not all that close (because Tegoshi is friendly like that). “Poor Jin!” the younger boy sobs, and Jin ends up being the one who has to pat Tegoshi’s back comfortingly.

Massu is silent about everything but looks vaguely ill; Koyama is running around frantically looking for loose change for the vending machine. “Do you like chocolate, Jin?!” he asks as he rifles through the couch cushions. He knows he’s dropped coins in it before.

Shige finds a few hundred yen coins in his pockets and gives them to Koyama. Koyama looks relieved; the two of them leave the lounge in search of chocolate.

Ryo, in the meantime, picks up the July Myojo that has everyone in a frenzy. He flips through it-notes that he looks really sexy in his headshot-and then finds Jin’s big homecoming interview.

He reads a few lines of it and then promptly tosses the magazine back onto the table in disgust.

Jin looks back at him pathetically. “Ryo-chan?” he says, when Ryo doesn’t say anything for a moment or two.

Then Ryo pinches the bridge of his nose. “How dumb do you have to be,” he begins, “to not be able to find food in America?”

Jin just blinks a few times; he doesn’t get it. “What do you mean, Ryo-chan?”

Ryo just sighs and doesn’t say anything else. KAT-TUN is full of morons and it makes him tired.

A few minutes later, Koyama and Shige sprint back into the lounge with armfuls of snacks.

They give all of them to Jin.

2. Common Courtesy

Ueda is tired and goes to a café after work. He orders coffee and sits down at the shop’s counter with a music magazine, intent on letting himself enjoy some time away from Jin’s shrieking and Junno’s lame jokes, Nakamaru’s endless beat-boxing, Koki’s loud music and Kame’s complaints about everyone else.

The café is nice and secluded and best of all there are no screaming girls. It’s the kind of shop older people go to after work so Ueda doesn’t worry about being recognized or getting asked for Jin’s phone number like he usually is.

But the peace and quiet is ruined just as the shop master brings Ueda his coffee; a man in a slick suit with one of those flashing cell phone headpieces clipped to his ear barges in to the café, shouting at the top of his lungs. “I don’t care if New York isn’t in line yet, we’re already two days behind schedule and I have to present to the board tomorrow morning. Make her work through the night if you have to!” the man snarls, and slams his briefcase down on the countertop beside Ueda’s drink. The impact causes coffee to spill over the edge of Ueda’s cup and onto the dish underneath.

Everyone else in the shop stops to look at the newcomer.

The shop keeper nervously wrings his hands and looks torn between telling the man to please be quiet or retreating into the back to avoid a fiasco.

Ueda is the only one who doesn’t really react; he’s been in this situation a thousand times before because he is in a boyband full of noisy people.

So he just does exactly what he does every time he is in a situation like this, whether the noise is from Koki’s speakers or Jin’s mouth or Maru’s throat or a random person yelling angrily on his phone.

Ueda makes a fist and very calmly punches the man in the face.

3. Public Transportation

Nakamaru is sitting peacefully at the back of the bus with his headphones on. It’s a little bit crowded because of the morning rush but he doesn’t notice; his eyes are closed and his walkman is blaring. He practices beat-boxing on his way to work.

Moments later, at the front of the bus, the driver hears something weird-is the engine overheating?

Then it stops for a little bit. The driver breathes in relief and keeps driving. It’s probably just a minor kink that had gotten worked out all on its own.

But then it starts again a few seconds later; this time it sounds like something exploded.

The bus driver panics and slams on the breaks. He pulls over. “Sorry everyone!” he announces over the loudspeaker. “I think there is something wrong.” He quickly gets out of his seat and goes around front to check the engine. The rest of the passengers start murmuring; some in confusion and some in annoyance. They have to get to work!

When he finally notices that the bus has stopped, Nakamaru blinks and takes off his headphones. “What’s going on?” he asks. “Is everything okay?”

The old lady next to him gives him a dirty look.

He is very confused, but bows and apologizes to her anyway.

She hits him with her handbag.

4. Being a Good Host

Kame is nervous because he has guests to entertain tonight; guests who aren’t his bandmates or his senpai or his kouhai, so he suspects that they can’t be kept amused with something as simple as a stupid game with horrendous punishments lined up for the losers. Rather, these are his parents’ friends and their teenaged children, and as the big brother, he will be in charge of taking care of the younger kids while the adults converse.

He’s not quite sure what to do. He knows that he is not good at jokes like Koki and he can’t juggle like Junno or beat-box like Maru.

As the time of the dinner party draws nearer and nearer he gets more and more nervous. When he can’t take it anymore he buckles down and calls Yamapi for advice, because Yamapi always knows what to do in any situation (which is why he writes for Seventeen). Over the phone, Yamapi cheerfully tells him: “Kame is Kame, so Kame should do what he knows best, ne? I believe you can make this a great party! Ganbatte!”

Kame smiles into the phone at Yamapi’s enthusiasm and is so inspired by Yamapi’s faith in him that he feels like he can do just about anything now, even though in the end, Yamapi hadn’t really given him any suggestions. “Yosh,” Kame says quietly to himself, and pumps his fist like he knows Yamapi would in this sort of situation. “What I know best.”

Three hours later, the guests arrive. Kame smiles and greets them properly.

Then he starts to unbutton his pants.

5. Going to College

After studying English in an American college Jin is very briefly enamored with the idea of getting to live a university student’s life. He convinces himself that he would do well in that sort of lifestyle because he looks good in glasses; after all Shige, Tegoshi, Koyama and Yamapi all seem to put on glasses whenever they are doing their homework in-between rehearsals.

When he tells the rest of KAT-TUN this they kind of laugh at him. “Being a student is harder than it looks!” Nakamaru says.

Jin doesn’t think so. “Half of NewS is in college!” he replies. It can’t be that hard.

Nakamaru and Koki look at each other. Then they both say, “Four out of six is not half, boss!” before they burst into giggles.

Jin scowls at them and storms off-they wouldn’t understand anyway; none of them have ever taken any real university courses before. And three out of six is definitely half; Koyama doesn’t count anymore because he’s already graduated.

Feeling superior because of his victory, Jin decides to join Yamapi on NewS’ practice floor because he is tired of being surrounded by dumb people. When he gets there he is just in time; Shige, Tegoshi, and Yamapi are sitting down to study. Perfect, Jin takes out the fashionable glasses he bought himself yesterday in Harajuku and puts them on.

Then he pulls up a chair behind Yamapi and furrows his brow as he reads over his best friend’s shoulder. The three NewS members all look like they are concentrating very hard, so he tries to fit in by furrowing his brow and pursing his lips cutely as well.

Before long he is in good spirits again, because this is exactly the sort of environment he had been looking for. The rest of the guys in his group wouldn’t be able to understand this type of camaraderie between students, after all. “I see, I see,” he murmurs to himself as he reads, pretending to be interested in whatever it is that Yamapi is studying.

After a while, Yamapi gets sick of it and reaches out to flick his nose. “Bakanishi, I’m studying!” he says.

Jin sniffs. “So am I.” Then he turns to look over Tegoshi’s shoulder instead, because Tegoshi would never flick anyone in the nose. He’s right, Tegoshi even smiles and moves over a little bit so that Jin can see his textbook better.

Jin makes a confused face as he tries to make out some of the words. They are very long and a lot of them are in English. “Imple…imple…”

Tegoshi pauses and looks at Jin. Smiles again. “Implementational level,” he chirrups, cheerfully.

Jin stares. “What’s that?”

From behind the rims of his own stylish glasses, Tegoshi blinks. “What’s that? Er, well… it’s… hmm. Well, it’s kind of hard to explain. In cognitive science there are different approaches to studying human knowledge, and all of those approaches have different subsets to them. This chapter is about the symbolic approach, which states that there are various different levels of analysis from which the brain and mind can be studied-it also suggests that mental phenomena are best studied from multiple levels of abstraction. These levels are then broken into three sub groups within the symbolic approach, of which the implementational level is one category. The implemenetational level actually describes the physical parts that make up the mind and…”

“Tegoshi,” Shige begins, looking up from his law text. He shakes his head at the younger boy.

Tegoshi turns apologetic. “Eh? Was I being noisy?”

Shige shakes his head again. “No…but…” he gestures to Akanishi.

Akanishi is asleep.

His head is lolling on Yamapi’s shoulder now and he is drooling a little-he definitely hadn’t been listening to a word Tegoshi was saying.

Tegoshi doesn’t mind. In fact, he giggles. “Ne,” he whispers to Shige after a moment, “Jin looks good in glasses, don’t you think?”

6. Group Date

KAT-TUN has never had a group date that hasn’t been planned out for them well in advance and then filmed for a TV show before, so the prospect of experiencing this sort of thing for the first time is both exciting and intimidating all at once.

“Ah, I’m too nervous!” Maru exclaims as they wait for the girls. He fans himself with his hands. “I don’t know what to do.”

Jin is tired of Maru’s whining; he creates an uncomfortable atmosphere for everyone when he complains like this. Well, for everyone except for Ueda, who is sipping coffee and reading a music magazine in the back of the room like some sort of ojiichan who is only here to babysit the kids.

“You are almost 24 years old!” Jin tells Maru, and grabs him by the shoulders. “We are just going to karaoke with some cute girls Yamapi set us up with for a while. You have performed for more than a million cute girls already, how can you be so nervous for something like this?”

“But this is a date!” Nakamaru persists.

“It’s not that different,” Jin says, and waves at his older friend dismissively.

Maru looks skeptical. Koki looks skeptical too. “It isn’t?” they ask.

“It isn’t!” Jin states, confidently.

“It’s completely different,” Kame feels the need to say. Jin ignores him.

“Here, you do it like this,” Jin begins, and pulls Maru onto the couch beside him. He makes sure that they are close enough so that their thighs are touching. Then, he looks intently into Maru’s eyes as he takes one of Maru’s hands in his own. Their fingers intertwine.

Maru has no idea what is going on; he humors Jin because Jin seems like the type who has dated hundreds of girls before.

“Ne…are you having fun?” Jin asks after a moment, and lowers his voice so it is just barely above a whisper. It is very sexy, but also very hard to hear.

“What!?” Maru exclaims-loudly- and leans in closer to try and make out what Jin is saying now.

Jin reaches out with his free hand and cups Maru’s face. “I said,” he repeats, and licks his lips, “are you having fun?” He smiles then, all pouty and seductive.

Maru blinks-why is Jin making that face at him?

He’s about to ask about it, but then, then the door opens.

It makes a loud noise when the latch pops, and Jin and Maru both look right at exactly the same time when they hear it. This makes their cheeks touch.

And suddenly there are six girls standing wide-eyed in the doorway to the karaoke room. They are all staring at Jin and Nakamaru as the two boys sit on the couch cheek-to-cheek and thigh-to-thigh and holding hands.

One girl-cute and with pigtails-sighs and rubs her temples. “Oh god,” she says, when she takes in the sight. “Not again.”

The rest of the girls agree. “This sucks!” they say. “Let’s go home.”

They don’t say anything else after that; they just close the door and leave.

Back in the karaoke room, there is a moment of silence.

And then Junno laughs. “That was weird,” he exclaims.

Everyone ignores him.

“Does this mean I can go home now?” Ueda asks after a minute or two has passed.

Junno looks like he is going to laugh again; Koki smacks him by rote.

Jin scowls and disentangles himself from a very confused Nakamaru. “Good going, guys!” he sulks. “Now what are we going to do?”

Nakamaru tries to be positive. “Well, we booked the room for four hours; we might as well sing something.” Then he and Koki proceed to fight over who gets to go first. Maru is visibly more relaxed now than he’d been earlier, and Junno chimes in that he wants to sing some Celine Dion.

Jin sighs. For the second time in so many days, he finds himself wishing that he was with NewS again.

He is fairly certain that their group dates go much better than this.

END

EDITS PLZ.

ueda, jin, koyama, je, kat-tun, masuda, kame, yamapi, nakamaru, news, tegoshi, junno, shige, ryo, koki

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