Porn Music
I just heard this on Radio KoL (for players of Kingdom of Loathing). I burst out laughing at the Girls on Girls rift in the middle. This is some Dr. Demento ripe material.
Internet Porn
by Da Vinci's Notebook
Back in the not too distant past
When I would need a quick repast
Or a temporary break from my agenda
Up to the bedroom I would head
Pull out the Playboy from 'neath the bed
And sneak a peak at all the portraits of pudenda
My alternatives were slim
If I tried to find another source for sin
I'd have to hang out with the losers in the back room of my local video store
But last month I finally made the call
I got a brand new cable modem installed
And it opened up the floodgates of a whole new universe of INTERNET PORN
Internet porn: Roman orgy scenes
Internet porn: Dominatrix queens
Internet porn: Girl on girl on girl on girl on girl on guy on sheep
Internet porn: Gross anatomy
Internet porn: Pam and Tommy Lee
Internet porn: When you're given so much to choose from who has time to sleep?
Honestly honey, I dunno how the link got on there!
After my girlfriend goes to sleep
And I get out of bed and down the hall I creep
So I can hunker down and wallow in depravity until 3 or 4
You'll always find me in that same tableau
Silhouetted by my monitor's warm glow
And absorbing all the bounty from the cornucopia of INTERNET PORN
Internet porn: Barely legal teens
Internet porn: Naughty figurines
Internet porn: Geriatric German grandmas spanking Spanish men
Internet porn: Erotic Asian art
Internet porn: Guys with extra parts
Internet porn: I don't think I'm ever going to see the sun again!
Internet porn: Male-in-love.com
Internet porn: There's my neighbor's mom
Internet porn: Bikers wearing diapers chasing nurses dressed like smurfs
Internet porn: Massage le crevage
Internet porn: Oh de' toi menage
Internet porn: Every kind of smut from every corner of the earth!
The Internet is for Porn
from Avenue Q
KATE
The internet is really really great
TREKKIE MONSTER
For porn
KATE
I’ve got a fast connection so i don’t have to wait
TREKKIE
For porn
KATE
Huh?
There's always some new site,
TREKKIE
For porn!
I browse all day and night
TREKKIE
For porn!
KATE
It's like i’m surfing at the speed of light
TREKKIE
For porn!
KATE
Trekkie!
TREKKIE
The internet is for porn
KATE
Trekkie!
TREKKIE
The internet is for porn,
KATE
What are you doing!?
TREKKIE
Why you think the net was born?
Porn porn porn
KATE
Treee-kkie!
TREKKIE
Oh hello kate monster
KATE
You are ruining my song
TREKKIE
Oh me sorry, me no mean to
KATE
Well if you wouldnt mind please being quiet for a minute so i can finish?
TREKKIE
Me no talkie
KATE
Good
I’m glad we have this new technology
TREKKIE
For porn
KATE
Which gives us untold opportunity
TREKKIE
For por-oops, sorry
KATE
Right from you own desktop
TREKKIE
For ---
KATE
You can research browse and shop
Until you’ve had enough and your ready to stop
TREKKIE
FOR PORN!!
Trekkie!
TREKKIE
The internet is for porn!
KATE
Noooo
TREKKIE
The internet if for porn!
KATE
Trekkie
TREKKIE
Me up all night honking me horn to porn, porn, porn!
KATE
That’s gross you’re a pervert
TREKKIE
Ah, sticks and stones Kate monster
KATE
NO really, your a pervert
Normal people don’t sit at home and look
At porn on the internet
TREKKIE
Ohhhh?
KATE
What?!
TREKKIE
You have no idea
Ready normal people?
NORMAL PEOPLE
Ready--- ready ----ready
TREKKIE
Let me hear it!
TREKKIE AND GUYS
The internet is for porn!
PRINCETON
Sorry kate
TREKKIE AND GUYS
The internet is for porn!
PRINCETON
I masturbate!
TREKKIE AND GUYS
All these guys unzip their flies
For porn, porn, porn!
KATE
The internet is not for porn!!
TREKKIE AND GUYS
PORN!, PORN, P---
KATE
HOLD ON A SECOND!
Now i know for a fact that you, Rob, check your portfolio and trade stocks online
ROB
That’s correct.
KATE
And Brian, you buy things on Amazon.com
BRIAN
Sure!
KATE
And Gary, you keep selling your possesions on Ebay
GARY
Yes I do!
KATE
And Princeton, you sent me that sweet online birthday card
PRINCETON
True!
TREKKIE
Oh, but Kate-
What you think he do . . .after? hmm?
PRINCETON
. .yeah
KATE
EEEWWWWW!
TREKKIE AND GUYS
The internet is for porn!
KATE
Gross!
TREKKIE AND GUYS
The internet is for porn!
KATE
I hate porn
TREKKIE AND GUYS
Grab your dick and double click
KATE
I hate you men!
TREKKIE AND GUYS
For porn, porn, porn!
(harmonizing) porn, porn, porn, porn
KATE
I’m leaving!
TREKKIE AND GUYS
Porn, porn, porn, porn
porn, porn, porn, porn
KATE
I hate the internet!
TREKKIE AND GUYS
Porn, porn, porn, porn
TREKKIE
The internet is for
TREKKIE AND SOME
The internet is for
TREKKIE AND ALL
The internet is for PORN!
TREKKIE
YEAH!
Come on guys & girls, you know you want too...
Give me some more song titles like these...
Internet Porn
by Da Vinci's Notebook
Back in the not too distant past
When I would need a quick repast
Or a temporary break from my agenda
Up to the bedroom I would head
Pull out the Playboy from 'neath the bed
And sneak a peak at all the portraits of pudenda
My alternatives were slim
If I tried to find another source for sin
I'd have to hang out with the losers in the back room of my local video store
But last month I finally made the call
I got a brand new cable modem installed
And it opened up the floodgates of a whole new universe of INTERNET PORN
Internet porn: Roman orgy scenes
Internet porn: Dominatrix queens
Internet porn: Girl on girl on girl on girl on girl on guy on sheep
Internet porn: Gross anatomy
Internet porn: Pam and Tommy Lee
Internet porn: When you're given so much to choose from who has time to sleep?
Honestly honey, I dunno how the link got on there!
After my girlfriend goes to sleep
And I get out of bed and down the hall I creep
So I can hunker down and wallow in depravity until 3 or 4
You'll always find me in that same tableau
Silhouetted by my monitor's warm glow
And absorbing all the bounty from the cornucopia of INTERNET PORN
Internet porn: Barely legal teens
Internet porn: Naughty figurines
Internet porn: Geriatric German grandmas spanking Spanish men
Internet porn: Erotic Asian art
Internet porn: Guys with extra parts
Internet porn: I don't think I'm ever going to see the sun again!
Internet porn: Male-in-love.com
Internet porn: There's my neighbor's mom
Internet porn: Bikers wearing diapers chasing nurses dressed like smurfs
Internet porn: Massage le crevage
Internet porn: Oh de' toi menage
Internet porn: Every kind of smut from every corner of the earth!
The Internet is for Porn
from Avenue Q
KATE
The internet is really really great
TREKKIE MONSTER
For porn
KATE
I’ve got a fast connection so i don’t have to wait
TREKKIE
For porn
KATE
Huh?
There's always some new site,
TREKKIE
For porn!
I browse all day and night
TREKKIE
For porn!
KATE
It's like i’m surfing at the speed of light
TREKKIE
For porn!
KATE
Trekkie!
TREKKIE
The internet is for porn
KATE
Trekkie!
TREKKIE
The internet is for porn,
KATE
What are you doing!?
TREKKIE
Why you think the net was born?
Porn porn porn
KATE
Treee-kkie!
TREKKIE
Oh hello kate monster
KATE
You are ruining my song
TREKKIE
Oh me sorry, me no mean to
KATE
Well if you wouldnt mind please being quiet for a minute so i can finish?
TREKKIE
Me no talkie
KATE
Good
I’m glad we have this new technology
TREKKIE
For porn
KATE
Which gives us untold opportunity
TREKKIE
For por-oops, sorry
KATE
Right from you own desktop
TREKKIE
For ---
KATE
You can research browse and shop
Until you’ve had enough and your ready to stop
TREKKIE
FOR PORN!!
Trekkie!
TREKKIE
The internet is for porn!
KATE
Noooo
TREKKIE
The internet if for porn!
KATE
Trekkie
TREKKIE
Me up all night honking me horn to porn, porn, porn!
KATE
That’s gross you’re a pervert
TREKKIE
Ah, sticks and stones Kate monster
KATE
NO really, your a pervert
Normal people don’t sit at home and look
At porn on the internet
TREKKIE
Ohhhh?
KATE
What?!
TREKKIE
You have no idea
Ready normal people?
NORMAL PEOPLE
Ready--- ready ----ready
TREKKIE
Let me hear it!
TREKKIE AND GUYS
The internet is for porn!
PRINCETON
Sorry kate
TREKKIE AND GUYS
The internet is for porn!
PRINCETON
I masturbate!
TREKKIE AND GUYS
All these guys unzip their flies
For porn, porn, porn!
KATE
The internet is not for porn!!
TREKKIE AND GUYS
PORN!, PORN, P---
KATE
HOLD ON A SECOND!
Now i know for a fact that you, Rob, check your portfolio and trade stocks online
ROB
That’s correct.
KATE
And Brian, you buy things on Amazon.com
BRIAN
Sure!
KATE
And Gary, you keep selling your possesions on Ebay
GARY
Yes I do!
KATE
And Princeton, you sent me that sweet online birthday card
PRINCETON
True!
TREKKIE
Oh, but Kate-
What you think he do . . .after? hmm?
PRINCETON
. .yeah
KATE
EEEWWWWW!
TREKKIE AND GUYS
The internet is for porn!
KATE
Gross!
TREKKIE AND GUYS
The internet is for porn!
KATE
I hate porn
TREKKIE AND GUYS
Grab your dick and double click
KATE
I hate you men!
TREKKIE AND GUYS
For porn, porn, porn!
(harmonizing) porn, porn, porn, porn
KATE
I’m leaving!
TREKKIE AND GUYS
Porn, porn, porn, porn
porn, porn, porn, porn
KATE
I hate the internet!
TREKKIE AND GUYS
Porn, porn, porn, porn
TREKKIE
The internet is for
TREKKIE AND SOME
The internet is for
TREKKIE AND ALL
The internet is for PORN!
TREKKIE
YEAH!
Come on guys & girls, you know you want too...
Give me some more song titles like these...