i think i have cabin fever.
hmm. so this is me being bored and quarantining myself because i'm a pukey face.
so i was thinking.
when i go to college. i want to have these ultimate 5 games for drunken parties.
1. apples to apples.
2. jenga.
3. twister.
4. any pack of cards (for y'know... 4 hour long games of WAR... oh, and strip poker.)
aannnnndddd
5. i dont know... i just thought a top 5 list would sound better than a top 4.
so ive realized something. i'm a person of extremes. i'm either extremely social (i.e. going to parties everyweekend and getting shitfaced) or extremely not (i.e. present state where i stay in)
but i definately think that if i were to go to parties more, i wouldn't have as much fun without booze. because of the whole self-censoring thing that i subconciously love doing. and the fact that i try too hard at everything.
i dont know if i should completely give into the senior-itis thing that i've been dabbling in. its a nice feeling. but i'd feel bad for my teachers that i like. a big sortof slap in the face. i dont know. i definately haven't been doing anything lately though. maybe cuz i'm sick though but i dont know.
blargh.
ya wanna know something bad? i've been extremely nostalgic about my past drunken days. as unhealthy as it was, as sloppy as it was, and as obnoxious as it was (to the sober kiddos), it was fun. i was happy. i had good stories.
so i one hand i have the goody-two shoes with the perfect relationship with the man of my dreams who i've really been thinking about lately in having a serious future (crazy huh), and then in the other hand theres the not-so-safe route of the drunkenness and potentially health-hazardness but yet living life to its fullest.
i obviously am going to stay with my first hand. hah. dont get me wrong i'm not second guessing my relationship with bry or anything hah god i love the guy to pieces. he's perfect. but still. i wish that sometimes i could go back to the parties, even with him there.
hah. i want to get drunk. thats bad.
well enough with this stupid journal.
who reads this crap-ola anyways? (seriously. i want to know)
hah. i love you if you do though.
so i was thinking.
when i go to college. i want to have these ultimate 5 games for drunken parties.
1. apples to apples.
2. jenga.
3. twister.
4. any pack of cards (for y'know... 4 hour long games of WAR... oh, and strip poker.)
aannnnndddd
5. i dont know... i just thought a top 5 list would sound better than a top 4.
so ive realized something. i'm a person of extremes. i'm either extremely social (i.e. going to parties everyweekend and getting shitfaced) or extremely not (i.e. present state where i stay in)
but i definately think that if i were to go to parties more, i wouldn't have as much fun without booze. because of the whole self-censoring thing that i subconciously love doing. and the fact that i try too hard at everything.
i dont know if i should completely give into the senior-itis thing that i've been dabbling in. its a nice feeling. but i'd feel bad for my teachers that i like. a big sortof slap in the face. i dont know. i definately haven't been doing anything lately though. maybe cuz i'm sick though but i dont know.
blargh.
ya wanna know something bad? i've been extremely nostalgic about my past drunken days. as unhealthy as it was, as sloppy as it was, and as obnoxious as it was (to the sober kiddos), it was fun. i was happy. i had good stories.
so i one hand i have the goody-two shoes with the perfect relationship with the man of my dreams who i've really been thinking about lately in having a serious future (crazy huh), and then in the other hand theres the not-so-safe route of the drunkenness and potentially health-hazardness but yet living life to its fullest.
i obviously am going to stay with my first hand. hah. dont get me wrong i'm not second guessing my relationship with bry or anything hah god i love the guy to pieces. he's perfect. but still. i wish that sometimes i could go back to the parties, even with him there.
hah. i want to get drunk. thats bad.
well enough with this stupid journal.
who reads this crap-ola anyways? (seriously. i want to know)
hah. i love you if you do though.