*^~Heart-brOken~^*
Horoscope for today...
Spontaneity is the name of the game, and the stars want you to be a master player. You're feeling frisky when it comes to social interactions and even more talkative than usual. Even better, you're inclined to let bygones be bygones and ignore incidents that otherwise would have caused you (needless) hours of embarrassment. Make sure you accept all invitations that come your way to celebrate your new self.
Havent really settled down emotionally and mentally after the split up in MSN on Saturday night. It was at the edge of the cliff so be it the sooner or later, this will happened and it really did. He'd a good thought during the oversea trip during his break and both of us come to a conclusion that it'll be better that we remain as friends for he prefer single life and much tougher for him to really take care of another person with the kind of hectic working schedule he has [so being very understanding & tolerance is a major role in me], and he wont really want to settled down even tho he's young no more. As for the feeling, just seems both of us kinda get stuck inbetween of still loving and not anymore. Complicated huh. Kinda sad anyway...he mentioned alot of factors and really breaks my heart for the frankness in our relation. Perhaps...we're not fated and infact the timing is so not right.
He initial to meet me for dinner and also to pass me things he got back from the trip. I rejected it at the verge of getting pissed with him for not meeting him but his friend..[shall not elaboorate] But for the sake of seeing him again as a bf again...i requested again and he thinks Im forcing myself to..
Nevertheless, i met up with him on Sunday and he dressed shaggy and sulked as usual. WE went to Rocher to take vegeteran food along the street and took some shots before he accompanied me back home. I was unusally noisy that day and I was so afraid the emotion will break out anytime so I tried to talk n crack as much jokes as possible. He wanted me to have some silence but i couldnt do it..i just can....if i do ..i knw any moments i'll 'rain'. it's getting abit awkward at first cos i dint knw what i should do, whether i can still cling on to his arms liked i do or hold his finger...trying to do it but he just trying to avoid too. Sad.
i was observing his eyes all the while during that day and sometimes...the eyes can get watery abit and i knw he's fighting back the tears and trying to portrait his strong side. Im really impressed with him. He tried to give me some tests to see if we really 'like mind think alike'. It took me quite sometime to realise the tactic..im glad after afew trys.
ON the journey back, he keep checking the arrival of his station so that he could alight but i dint want him to leave 1st so i cling on to him and when his station announced, he tried to stand and i simply burst into tears, sorry. i just couldnt hold it back any longer, i tried but it failed.
normally when he sent me home, i'll not get out of the station only to accompany back to the plateform to the other side to wit for his train to leave but this time round...i made him missed 6trains and again..i burst into tears 3x.......its feeling so so terrible. I let him go after the 7th train approached and i hug him for quite long...long enough to let the train wait for us....holding this hug will last fro eternity and that moment will just stay.....the time will just stop for us.
UNfortunatly, reality is cruel..nothing is permenent. I think i really going to take quite a longperiod tie to recover....bring this issue up and the memories itself will bring back alot of emotions.
That all for the night...til then...*sniff*
Spontaneity is the name of the game, and the stars want you to be a master player. You're feeling frisky when it comes to social interactions and even more talkative than usual. Even better, you're inclined to let bygones be bygones and ignore incidents that otherwise would have caused you (needless) hours of embarrassment. Make sure you accept all invitations that come your way to celebrate your new self.
Havent really settled down emotionally and mentally after the split up in MSN on Saturday night. It was at the edge of the cliff so be it the sooner or later, this will happened and it really did. He'd a good thought during the oversea trip during his break and both of us come to a conclusion that it'll be better that we remain as friends for he prefer single life and much tougher for him to really take care of another person with the kind of hectic working schedule he has [so being very understanding & tolerance is a major role in me], and he wont really want to settled down even tho he's young no more. As for the feeling, just seems both of us kinda get stuck inbetween of still loving and not anymore. Complicated huh. Kinda sad anyway...he mentioned alot of factors and really breaks my heart for the frankness in our relation. Perhaps...we're not fated and infact the timing is so not right.
He initial to meet me for dinner and also to pass me things he got back from the trip. I rejected it at the verge of getting pissed with him for not meeting him but his friend..[shall not elaboorate] But for the sake of seeing him again as a bf again...i requested again and he thinks Im forcing myself to..
Nevertheless, i met up with him on Sunday and he dressed shaggy and sulked as usual. WE went to Rocher to take vegeteran food along the street and took some shots before he accompanied me back home. I was unusally noisy that day and I was so afraid the emotion will break out anytime so I tried to talk n crack as much jokes as possible. He wanted me to have some silence but i couldnt do it..i just can....if i do ..i knw any moments i'll 'rain'. it's getting abit awkward at first cos i dint knw what i should do, whether i can still cling on to his arms liked i do or hold his finger...trying to do it but he just trying to avoid too. Sad.
i was observing his eyes all the while during that day and sometimes...the eyes can get watery abit and i knw he's fighting back the tears and trying to portrait his strong side. Im really impressed with him. He tried to give me some tests to see if we really 'like mind think alike'. It took me quite sometime to realise the tactic..im glad after afew trys.
ON the journey back, he keep checking the arrival of his station so that he could alight but i dint want him to leave 1st so i cling on to him and when his station announced, he tried to stand and i simply burst into tears, sorry. i just couldnt hold it back any longer, i tried but it failed.
normally when he sent me home, i'll not get out of the station only to accompany back to the plateform to the other side to wit for his train to leave but this time round...i made him missed 6trains and again..i burst into tears 3x.......its feeling so so terrible. I let him go after the 7th train approached and i hug him for quite long...long enough to let the train wait for us....holding this hug will last fro eternity and that moment will just stay.....the time will just stop for us.
UNfortunatly, reality is cruel..nothing is permenent. I think i really going to take quite a longperiod tie to recover....bring this issue up and the memories itself will bring back alot of emotions.
That all for the night...til then...*sniff*