What if this had not happend? What if she hadn't gone?

[perfectdesguise]

So this work stuff, not so great.... these last two days have been soooo long, and i didnt even work a whole day today. What the hell kinda spring break is this? See, this work stuff is quazi nice because i jsut listen to my headphones all day, but that allows A Lot of thought to be processed, and its hard to put things behind you when there is nothng else to think about. Example. i spent almost a full 8 hours thinking about a problem, fianlly making a decision abouit it, and never doing it in the end. Basically it is making me depressed, i have been thinking of the things that happen around easters and it makes my stomach ache. I donno, i know things are different now, and people are in better states of mind, but its still sad to think about, and you almost stil have to ask yourself, so whats this year? I donno, all this working is bad for my mental health, hc. I Basically just think about everything and anything, and its quite depressing.
It really doesnt feel like spring break, it doenst feel like a sat either. I did some fun stuff today i must admit, but still, its just like ummmmm this is my senior year and this is what i am doing???? I guess its because i let myself listen to the hype of making your senior year spring break memorable..... oh man, all those working hours are really memorable. i CAN already see it now, my summer is gonna be bitter.HC. wELL, i guess i can totally lookfoward to the end of next week, when my spring break is offically started. It will be fun going up there and being on our own, and getting away from here.
I am going to bed because this is lame, and it is easter tomorrow, and if i think about anymore of this stuff i might just get depressed.