FIC- Lies for Love Part Fifteen
Title: Lies for love
Pairing: Thirteen/Cameron, Thirteen/Cuddy
Rating: NC-17
Spoilers: Pretty much zilch. This is set at the beginning of Season 5 when House has his new team but contains nothing about them specific to episodes.
Disclaimer: I own... nada.
Summary: Thirteen can't remain faithful and risks losing everything that matters to her.
( Part One.) ( Part Two) ( Part Three) (Part Four) (Part Five) (Part Six) (Part Seven) (Part Eight) (Part Nine) (Part Ten) (Part Eleven) (Part Twelve) (Part Thirteen) (Part Fourteen)
There are flashbacks in this part that are written in italics. :)
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15.
For the rest of the week Thirteen remained at home in bed, unable to face leaving her apartment. Aside from getting up to go and grab something to eat from the kitchen once or twice a day (her appetite was close to zero) and showering each morning, she remained wrapped up in her duvet, alternating between crying and zoning out with the television on. She supposed that were she to go to a doctor they would diagnose her with depression; she most certainly wasn’t behaving normally. But at the same time she felt that she deserved to feel the way she did. Her only concern was for the upset she’d caused Cuddy, and no matter how much she wanted to be with her right now, or even to pick up the phone and call her so that she could hear her voice; she had to restrain herself.
It helped to focus on the memories, remembering exactly how it had been at the start. How happy and content she’d been with Cuddy before she’d fucked it all up and began cheating on her for absolutely no reason at all.
**
It had been a long day; longer than the average shift. They’d cured their patient, but as usual there was paperwork to be done; and as usual, Thirteen was left to do it. Taub has muttered something about going for a meal with his wife and Kutner had stated he had “stuff to do” that evidently meant he was playing on his Xbox360 with a takeaway, yet again. She really needed to learn to say no to them; it was only fair that they did the work some of the time, or at least once in a while. Normally it didn’t bother her, but when she was already tired and irritable, it didn’t exactly improve her mood.
Thirteen liked to get the paperwork done straight away whilst the details were still fresh in her mind. That way she could leave it on Cuddy’s desk for her to look over (House sure as hell wouldn’t be bothering) and then make any changes if they were needed. Unfortunately, she’d been so frustrated by her fellow colleagues leaving all the work to her this evening that it had taken her twice as long to complete. It was now nearing midnight, and though she had finally finished, she was sure that she was in for a serious lecture with the amount of mistakes she’d made in her notes.
Her bag slung over her shoulder, Thirteen half stumbled in the direction of Cuddy’s office. She wanted nothing more than to be at home in bed so she could get some sleep before her next shift started. In all honesty she could do with a day off, but there was no chance of House letting her have one without booking it in advance; everyone knew he wasn’t that sort of person. It seemed that Thirteen would have to make do with the little time she would get resting... if she ever managed to leave the hospital. Time always seemed to drag when it was late at night, when the corridors were empty and the only busy areas of the hospital were those where emergencies were happening.
Before she knew it, Thirteen reached Cuddy’s office. Unexpectedly there was a light shining through the door, and curious, Thirteen peered through the half open blinds. Her boss, Dr. Lisa Cuddy, was sitting at her desk, head bent over a file with a frown on her face, evidently trying to make sense of what she was reading. Thirteen wondered if it was something House had left for her, or it was merely another member of her medical staff with the typically awful doctor’s handwriting. Alone with no front that she was putting on for the benefit of her employees she looked beautifully vulnerable. Yes, she always looked attractive, but when she showed the human side of her there was something about her that made Thirteen’s heart melt.
As if sensing that there was someone watching her Cuddy stopped, looked up from her paperwork. Jerking her eyes away from the window, Thirteen paused and knocked on the door, heart now hammering. What if Cuddy had seen her staring?
“Come in,” Cuddy called out, sounding unsure.
Thirteen breathed a sigh of relief. Obviously she hadn’t seen her at the window, and had just sensed there was someone outside her office. Curling her hand around the doorknob, Thirteen obeyed Cuddy’s slightly nervous command. She slowly walked into the office, letting the door shut behind her, and held out the paperwork to Cuddy.
“House’s paperwork for our latest patient,” she said tiredly. The moment Cuddy took it she turned, ready to leave.
“Wait,” Cuddy said softly.
Thirteen turned back around, eyes wide but struggling to stay open. “Is there something wrong?”
“What? No,” Cuddy denied. “Why would there be something wrong?”
In her exhausted state, Thirteen didn’t think about having respect for the boss and she told the truth. “There’s usually something wrong when you want to talk to me.” She saw the shock on Cuddy’s face at her words. Regretting her answer straight away, she apologised, “I’m sorry. I had no right to say that.”
She wasn’t making it up; Cuddy usually did berate her for something or another whenever they interacted. Most of the time it was House related, but on occasion it was for something as mundane as Thirteen being late or not wearing her lab coat when she was in the clinic. These were crimes that House committed on a daily basis, but then he was the misanthropic genius and she was merely one of his underlings. The rules that he chose to disregard were up to him, but she didn’t have the privilege to do the same. Maybe if she was ever lucky enough to have his reputation then she would; but right now? No way.
Cuddy stood on the spot, an intense look on her face as she waved a hand to indicate that she wasn’t troubled by Thirteen’s words. A concerned tone to her voice, she asked, “Dr. Hadley, is everything ok?”
“S’fine,” Thirteen mumbled, rubbing her eyes. She was so very very tired.
“Are you sure?” Cuddy wore a caring expression on her face, and she swiftly moved to the other side of her desk towards Thirteen.
“Yeah,” Thirteen took a deep breath, feeling herself beginning to sway. God, this was so embarrassing. If she passed out...
“Come and sit down,” she heard Cuddy say.
Obeying, she allowed Cuddy to lead her over to the couch, where she slumped, immediately feeling better now that she wasn’t wasting what little energy she had on standing up.
Cuddy pressed her hand to Thirteen’s forehead. Thirteen couldn’t help but take a sharp intake of breath as the other woman touched her. “You’re burning up. Are you feeling ok?”
“Fine. I’m just tired,” Thirteen assured her. She really was just sleepy. Forcing her eyes to open, she stated, “I need to get home.”
“Whoa... hang on,” Cuddy commanded, ever the boss. “You’re not planning on driving home in this state are you?”
“It’ll be ok; I don’t live far,” Thirteen told her.
“I don’t care. For you to drive like this is far too dangerous,” Cuddy held out a hand to Thirteen, pulling her up. “Come on; I’ll take you.”
Thirteen didn’t refuse.
**
Smiling, Thirteen remembered exactly how much of an idiot she’d felt. She guessed that in all the years of Cuddy being Dean of Medicine she had never had an employee nearly pass out in her office. The only thing she could be glad for was the fact that she hadn’t actually lost consciousness; a small mercy. A couple of months into their relationship Cuddy had brought it up one night when Thirteen had started falling asleep on the couch, her head lolling onto Cuddy’s shoulder. Cuddy had remarked on the similarities of Thirteen’s actions to the first night they’d spent together, just cuddling, holding one another.
**
Before she knew it they’d arrived outside her apartment. The journey had been completed in silence, with neither woman knowing what to say to the other, and Thirteen resting her head against the window; eyes shut. Upon the car engine stopping, Thirteen lifted her head; the ten minutes with her eyes closed having served to make her feel a little more alert than before. Smiling, Thirteen thanked her boss. “I appreciate the lift. It was... nice of you to offer.”
Cuddy returned the smile. “See, I’m not all bad; am I?”
Thirteen felt her cheeks flush at Cuddy’s words. “I’m sorry about earlier. I really didn’t mean to...”
“It’s ok,” Cuddy interrupted. “We all get that way sometimes, and working closely with House isn’t easy.”
“Still,” Thirteen countered. “I shouldn’t have spoke to you like that.” Without really thinking about her actions, she placed a hand on Cuddy’s, which was resting in her lap.
Surprisingly, Cuddy didn’t pull away. Instead, she gazed in Thirteen’s direction, a somewhat anxious expression on her face. It was then that Thirteen felt Cuddy’s hand tremble beneath her own, and she blurted out in astonishment, “Do I make you nervous?”
“No,” Cuddy denied, though she looked away as she spoke. She pulled her hand from underneath Thirteen’s. “I think you should go now, Dr. Hadley.”
Thirteen realised in that moment that Cuddy might actually have the smallest of crushes on her. Unable to stop herself from grinning; she decided to take a chance. If Cuddy threatened to fire her then she could always say she was so tired that she didn’t know what she was doing. Right? Moving her hand, Thirteen raised it up to Cuddy’s face, gently turning her head so that once again she was facing Thirteen’s direction. Cuddy didn’t try to resist; something that Thirteen chose to read as a good sign that meant she could continue. Using her other hand, she clicked her seatbelt free, and she shuffled in Cuddy’s direction.
“Dr. Hadley,” Cuddy protested as she realised what Thirteen was going to attempt to do.
Undeterred, Thirteen didn’t wait to see what she would say next. She clashed her lips against Cuddy’s immediately enjoying the softness and warmth of Cuddy’s mouth. Her boss gasped at the contact and taking her opportunity, Thirteen slid her tongue inside Cuddy’s mouth, jolts of desire travelling down her body as she did so. What could only have been seconds later, Cuddy began to reciprocate; clutching at Thirteen’s waist and thrusting their bodies together. It seemed Thirteen had read the signals correctly, and she wasn’t going to be refused by the Dean. Pulling away for a moment, she invited in a low voice, “Come upstairs.”
Cuddy immediately looked hesitant. “I don’t think I should. I mean I’ve done this with a woman before but... I...”
“It’s ok,” Thirteen reassured her. “We don’t have to do anything. Promise.”
Cuddy still looked unsure. “You’re my employee, and a one night stand isn’t a good idea.”
“Like I said; we don’t have to do anything. And even if we did... who says it has to be a one night stand?” Thirteen raised her eyebrows. Sliding out of her side of the car, she opened the driver’s door to allow Cuddy out; if she wanted to.
Much to her delight, Cuddy followed. And true to her word, Thirteen hadn’t attempted to press Cuddy into anything she wasn’t ready for. She’d led her to the bedroom, made out with her on the bed fully clothed for what was no longer than ten minutes. Eventually, Cuddy had looked at her watch and stated that Thirteen should get some rest considering what had happened earlier on. Thirteen had agreed, and telling Cuddy she was welcome to stay with no strings attached if she wanted to, stripped down to her vest and girl boxers for bed. When she’d got back from brushing her teeth it was a nice surprise for Thirteen to find Cuddy still there, curled up under the duvet.
“I hope you don’t mind me wearing this,” Cuddy gestured towards Thirteen’s man-sized shirt that she’d put on. “Suits aren’t exactly made for sleeping in.”
“It’s fine,” Thirteen smiled knowing that ordinarily she would mind, but somehow not caring this time. She had shoved that thought to the back of her mind to process later on. “You look really sexy in it, actually.”
And that was the first time she’d heard Cuddy laugh. Really laugh. A deep, throaty chuckle that made Thirteen want to kiss her over and over again.
So she did.
**
Though it was only a few months, that seemed like so long ago. Thirteen longed for that moment once again, just to be able to relive it with the emotions she was feeling, the happiness, and not going to bed alone for what felt like the thousandth time that year. Whenever she had brought someone back home with her she may not have been on her own; but that didn’t stop the lonely feeling inside that never seemed to disappear, no matter how many people she was with. That horrible emptiness that she’d never been able to fill until Cuddy.
That very same feeling that she was experience once again.
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Pairing: Thirteen/Cameron, Thirteen/Cuddy
Rating: NC-17
Spoilers: Pretty much zilch. This is set at the beginning of Season 5 when House has his new team but contains nothing about them specific to episodes.
Disclaimer: I own... nada.
Summary: Thirteen can't remain faithful and risks losing everything that matters to her.
( Part One.) ( Part Two) ( Part Three) (Part Four) (Part Five) (Part Six) (Part Seven) (Part Eight) (Part Nine) (Part Ten) (Part Eleven) (Part Twelve) (Part Thirteen) (Part Fourteen)
There are flashbacks in this part that are written in italics. :)
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15.
For the rest of the week Thirteen remained at home in bed, unable to face leaving her apartment. Aside from getting up to go and grab something to eat from the kitchen once or twice a day (her appetite was close to zero) and showering each morning, she remained wrapped up in her duvet, alternating between crying and zoning out with the television on. She supposed that were she to go to a doctor they would diagnose her with depression; she most certainly wasn’t behaving normally. But at the same time she felt that she deserved to feel the way she did. Her only concern was for the upset she’d caused Cuddy, and no matter how much she wanted to be with her right now, or even to pick up the phone and call her so that she could hear her voice; she had to restrain herself.
It helped to focus on the memories, remembering exactly how it had been at the start. How happy and content she’d been with Cuddy before she’d fucked it all up and began cheating on her for absolutely no reason at all.
**
It had been a long day; longer than the average shift. They’d cured their patient, but as usual there was paperwork to be done; and as usual, Thirteen was left to do it. Taub has muttered something about going for a meal with his wife and Kutner had stated he had “stuff to do” that evidently meant he was playing on his Xbox360 with a takeaway, yet again. She really needed to learn to say no to them; it was only fair that they did the work some of the time, or at least once in a while. Normally it didn’t bother her, but when she was already tired and irritable, it didn’t exactly improve her mood.
Thirteen liked to get the paperwork done straight away whilst the details were still fresh in her mind. That way she could leave it on Cuddy’s desk for her to look over (House sure as hell wouldn’t be bothering) and then make any changes if they were needed. Unfortunately, she’d been so frustrated by her fellow colleagues leaving all the work to her this evening that it had taken her twice as long to complete. It was now nearing midnight, and though she had finally finished, she was sure that she was in for a serious lecture with the amount of mistakes she’d made in her notes.
Her bag slung over her shoulder, Thirteen half stumbled in the direction of Cuddy’s office. She wanted nothing more than to be at home in bed so she could get some sleep before her next shift started. In all honesty she could do with a day off, but there was no chance of House letting her have one without booking it in advance; everyone knew he wasn’t that sort of person. It seemed that Thirteen would have to make do with the little time she would get resting... if she ever managed to leave the hospital. Time always seemed to drag when it was late at night, when the corridors were empty and the only busy areas of the hospital were those where emergencies were happening.
Before she knew it, Thirteen reached Cuddy’s office. Unexpectedly there was a light shining through the door, and curious, Thirteen peered through the half open blinds. Her boss, Dr. Lisa Cuddy, was sitting at her desk, head bent over a file with a frown on her face, evidently trying to make sense of what she was reading. Thirteen wondered if it was something House had left for her, or it was merely another member of her medical staff with the typically awful doctor’s handwriting. Alone with no front that she was putting on for the benefit of her employees she looked beautifully vulnerable. Yes, she always looked attractive, but when she showed the human side of her there was something about her that made Thirteen’s heart melt.
As if sensing that there was someone watching her Cuddy stopped, looked up from her paperwork. Jerking her eyes away from the window, Thirteen paused and knocked on the door, heart now hammering. What if Cuddy had seen her staring?
“Come in,” Cuddy called out, sounding unsure.
Thirteen breathed a sigh of relief. Obviously she hadn’t seen her at the window, and had just sensed there was someone outside her office. Curling her hand around the doorknob, Thirteen obeyed Cuddy’s slightly nervous command. She slowly walked into the office, letting the door shut behind her, and held out the paperwork to Cuddy.
“House’s paperwork for our latest patient,” she said tiredly. The moment Cuddy took it she turned, ready to leave.
“Wait,” Cuddy said softly.
Thirteen turned back around, eyes wide but struggling to stay open. “Is there something wrong?”
“What? No,” Cuddy denied. “Why would there be something wrong?”
In her exhausted state, Thirteen didn’t think about having respect for the boss and she told the truth. “There’s usually something wrong when you want to talk to me.” She saw the shock on Cuddy’s face at her words. Regretting her answer straight away, she apologised, “I’m sorry. I had no right to say that.”
She wasn’t making it up; Cuddy usually did berate her for something or another whenever they interacted. Most of the time it was House related, but on occasion it was for something as mundane as Thirteen being late or not wearing her lab coat when she was in the clinic. These were crimes that House committed on a daily basis, but then he was the misanthropic genius and she was merely one of his underlings. The rules that he chose to disregard were up to him, but she didn’t have the privilege to do the same. Maybe if she was ever lucky enough to have his reputation then she would; but right now? No way.
Cuddy stood on the spot, an intense look on her face as she waved a hand to indicate that she wasn’t troubled by Thirteen’s words. A concerned tone to her voice, she asked, “Dr. Hadley, is everything ok?”
“S’fine,” Thirteen mumbled, rubbing her eyes. She was so very very tired.
“Are you sure?” Cuddy wore a caring expression on her face, and she swiftly moved to the other side of her desk towards Thirteen.
“Yeah,” Thirteen took a deep breath, feeling herself beginning to sway. God, this was so embarrassing. If she passed out...
“Come and sit down,” she heard Cuddy say.
Obeying, she allowed Cuddy to lead her over to the couch, where she slumped, immediately feeling better now that she wasn’t wasting what little energy she had on standing up.
Cuddy pressed her hand to Thirteen’s forehead. Thirteen couldn’t help but take a sharp intake of breath as the other woman touched her. “You’re burning up. Are you feeling ok?”
“Fine. I’m just tired,” Thirteen assured her. She really was just sleepy. Forcing her eyes to open, she stated, “I need to get home.”
“Whoa... hang on,” Cuddy commanded, ever the boss. “You’re not planning on driving home in this state are you?”
“It’ll be ok; I don’t live far,” Thirteen told her.
“I don’t care. For you to drive like this is far too dangerous,” Cuddy held out a hand to Thirteen, pulling her up. “Come on; I’ll take you.”
Thirteen didn’t refuse.
**
Smiling, Thirteen remembered exactly how much of an idiot she’d felt. She guessed that in all the years of Cuddy being Dean of Medicine she had never had an employee nearly pass out in her office. The only thing she could be glad for was the fact that she hadn’t actually lost consciousness; a small mercy. A couple of months into their relationship Cuddy had brought it up one night when Thirteen had started falling asleep on the couch, her head lolling onto Cuddy’s shoulder. Cuddy had remarked on the similarities of Thirteen’s actions to the first night they’d spent together, just cuddling, holding one another.
**
Before she knew it they’d arrived outside her apartment. The journey had been completed in silence, with neither woman knowing what to say to the other, and Thirteen resting her head against the window; eyes shut. Upon the car engine stopping, Thirteen lifted her head; the ten minutes with her eyes closed having served to make her feel a little more alert than before. Smiling, Thirteen thanked her boss. “I appreciate the lift. It was... nice of you to offer.”
Cuddy returned the smile. “See, I’m not all bad; am I?”
Thirteen felt her cheeks flush at Cuddy’s words. “I’m sorry about earlier. I really didn’t mean to...”
“It’s ok,” Cuddy interrupted. “We all get that way sometimes, and working closely with House isn’t easy.”
“Still,” Thirteen countered. “I shouldn’t have spoke to you like that.” Without really thinking about her actions, she placed a hand on Cuddy’s, which was resting in her lap.
Surprisingly, Cuddy didn’t pull away. Instead, she gazed in Thirteen’s direction, a somewhat anxious expression on her face. It was then that Thirteen felt Cuddy’s hand tremble beneath her own, and she blurted out in astonishment, “Do I make you nervous?”
“No,” Cuddy denied, though she looked away as she spoke. She pulled her hand from underneath Thirteen’s. “I think you should go now, Dr. Hadley.”
Thirteen realised in that moment that Cuddy might actually have the smallest of crushes on her. Unable to stop herself from grinning; she decided to take a chance. If Cuddy threatened to fire her then she could always say she was so tired that she didn’t know what she was doing. Right? Moving her hand, Thirteen raised it up to Cuddy’s face, gently turning her head so that once again she was facing Thirteen’s direction. Cuddy didn’t try to resist; something that Thirteen chose to read as a good sign that meant she could continue. Using her other hand, she clicked her seatbelt free, and she shuffled in Cuddy’s direction.
“Dr. Hadley,” Cuddy protested as she realised what Thirteen was going to attempt to do.
Undeterred, Thirteen didn’t wait to see what she would say next. She clashed her lips against Cuddy’s immediately enjoying the softness and warmth of Cuddy’s mouth. Her boss gasped at the contact and taking her opportunity, Thirteen slid her tongue inside Cuddy’s mouth, jolts of desire travelling down her body as she did so. What could only have been seconds later, Cuddy began to reciprocate; clutching at Thirteen’s waist and thrusting their bodies together. It seemed Thirteen had read the signals correctly, and she wasn’t going to be refused by the Dean. Pulling away for a moment, she invited in a low voice, “Come upstairs.”
Cuddy immediately looked hesitant. “I don’t think I should. I mean I’ve done this with a woman before but... I...”
“It’s ok,” Thirteen reassured her. “We don’t have to do anything. Promise.”
Cuddy still looked unsure. “You’re my employee, and a one night stand isn’t a good idea.”
“Like I said; we don’t have to do anything. And even if we did... who says it has to be a one night stand?” Thirteen raised her eyebrows. Sliding out of her side of the car, she opened the driver’s door to allow Cuddy out; if she wanted to.
Much to her delight, Cuddy followed. And true to her word, Thirteen hadn’t attempted to press Cuddy into anything she wasn’t ready for. She’d led her to the bedroom, made out with her on the bed fully clothed for what was no longer than ten minutes. Eventually, Cuddy had looked at her watch and stated that Thirteen should get some rest considering what had happened earlier on. Thirteen had agreed, and telling Cuddy she was welcome to stay with no strings attached if she wanted to, stripped down to her vest and girl boxers for bed. When she’d got back from brushing her teeth it was a nice surprise for Thirteen to find Cuddy still there, curled up under the duvet.
“I hope you don’t mind me wearing this,” Cuddy gestured towards Thirteen’s man-sized shirt that she’d put on. “Suits aren’t exactly made for sleeping in.”
“It’s fine,” Thirteen smiled knowing that ordinarily she would mind, but somehow not caring this time. She had shoved that thought to the back of her mind to process later on. “You look really sexy in it, actually.”
And that was the first time she’d heard Cuddy laugh. Really laugh. A deep, throaty chuckle that made Thirteen want to kiss her over and over again.
So she did.
**
Though it was only a few months, that seemed like so long ago. Thirteen longed for that moment once again, just to be able to relive it with the emotions she was feeling, the happiness, and not going to bed alone for what felt like the thousandth time that year. Whenever she had brought someone back home with her she may not have been on her own; but that didn’t stop the lonely feeling inside that never seemed to disappear, no matter how many people she was with. That horrible emptiness that she’d never been able to fill until Cuddy.
That very same feeling that she was experience once again.
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