Mouthful of Lies (Possibly Triggering)
Mashed Potatoes with sour cream and cheese.
Peanut M&M's.
Oreo brownie.
White fudge covered pretzels.
Brownie with walnut.
12 minutes and 16 seconds.
That's all it took to shove all of this into my grubby little mouth.
Approximately 6 bottles of water later.
There I was.
Pulling my glasses off, and shoving them down my throat.
Everything is gone. I can breathe. I know I have rid myself.
42 minutes and 08 seconds.
*I do not purge. It's not something I enjoy. It's not something I want to do. That was the 6th time in my life that I have ever done it. Ever. I hated it. I knew I would hate it. Does that make any sense? Does my life even make any sense? Sometimes I start to believe that it doesn't.
This pattern ends now. I will no longer break fasts. No matter what. I dont care what my body wants. My body is going to do what I need. Need and want go hand in hand, anyways.
Im liquid fasting for the rest of the week. Send some support this way <3
Ohhh...and just to have a 'yay me' moment. It has been almost 48hrs since I have taken any pills. The only thing that passes my lips are the things they have me on from the accident. It's only 2 days...but it's a start.
I hope this find you all well and in good health :)
<3M