Brigid's Gift
This wasn't the original story I was going to write for Advent, but that was too sad and it's taking me longer than I thought to write it. So here is something of a prequel generated by that story.
Rating: R-ish, not particularly explicit
Title: Brigid’s Gift
Characters: Stephen Maturin, Jack Aubrey, Brigid Maturin, Killick, Amos Jacob, Mr Wells, Mr Reade
Disclaimer: They belong to Patrick O'Brian, I'm just borrowing them for a while.
Brigid’s Gift - Part 2
They spent the rest of the afternoon wandering through the penguin colony. Brigid laughed when she first heard their cries, “They sound like donkeys, not birds.”
“That is why they are called Jackass penguins. See they make burrows in the layer of guano atop the rock shelf. They lay their eggs there and once the chick is hatched one of the parents goes out to sea to catch squid and small fish and crustacea to feed themselves and their young while the other stays to protect the chick. They regurgitate some of the catch to feed their young. See there, a parent is feeding one of their chicks.”
“Is that the mother?” Asked Brigid.
“I’m not sure, the bird would have to be examined more closely to determine that. Both parents share feeding responsibilities and probably mate for life.”
Jack wrinkled his nose, “I wouldn’t fancy being a penguin chick. Hatched into a hole in the, oh …. What was that word you used Stephen?”
“Guano or to use a perfectly adequate English term, shit. Really Jack my Brigid is not such a shrinking violet that she is shocked by the word, but guano is a more scientifically accurate term.”
“I’m sure it is, if you say so Stephen. I’ll just go back to the boat. This place reeks a bit too much for me.”
Brigid looked up at Stephen and he grinned at her, “Your Uncle Jack has a very delicate nose.” She laughed and nodded.
They were left alone together as even Mr Wells preferred to retreat to the boat. Abruptly Brigid said, “Uncle Jack may not like this place but he likes touching you.”
Stephen surprised, looked down at her, “Yes he does. But why do you say that?”
She shrugged, “I feel it from you and him when ever you touch each other.”
“Feel it?” he prompted.
“The colours and energy around you change. You love Uncle Jack very much. Do you love him more than you loved Mama or the same? Your colours changed when you touched her. I saw that too.”
He stepped back, now slightly alarmed. “Do you see these colours around other people too? How do you know what the change in colours mean?”
“Padeen can do it and he told me that you could do this too when you were a child. I only have this gift because of you. He also said you stopped looking some time in the past because someone or something hurt you and you shrunk back into yourself. Were you too afraid to look any more? I know when I was very little and alone, I didn’t want to look because it hurt my head. Padeen made me look and helped me to only let the important people into my head. So, I saw you and Clarissa and Aunt Sophie and Uncle Jack and George, only people I like. I don’t take notice of the colours of those people who don’t interest me. The meanings of colours? I just feel them, there are no thoughts, just feelings. I can’t explain more than that.” She looked down.
This was the longest speech that Brigid had made to Stephen and he was disturbed, he stammered, “So just feelings, no direct thoughts.”
She nodded her head and looked down aware of his discomfort. She bit her lips and looked up at him, tears forming in her eyes, “You’re not angry with me?”
Stephen shook his head and knelt beside her and held her close, “Never in life my dear sweet Brigid. You are my dearest child, I could not love you more my dear. I was just surprised. Why didn’t you tell me of this before?”
She whispered, “Padeen thought it was better to keep it a secret. People would think I was strange, mad. And … you weren’t at home much for me to tell you.”
He looked stricken. She clasped his face, “Don’t be sad Papa. I don’t want to make you sad.”
He kissed her cheek and stood up and smiled down at her caressing her hair, “No my dear, you don’t. I was just feeling guilty and maybe a little sad because I have been away from you too long.”
She smiled up at him, “But you had to be with Uncle Jack, he needs you so much. He can’t be happy without you.”
“I see you know me and Uncle Jack much better than I thought. Come my dear, shall we go back to the boat?”
He held her hand and they walked back to the boat.
Jack had been watching them and was curious. “Stephen is everything all right?”
“Yes, oh yes, just a surprising discovery about my Brigid, a delightful surprise.” He smiled down at her and squeezed her hand. “Let’s go home.”
They returned to the ship and had a quiet supper with Brigid who was now, after the excitements of the day feeling very tired. She ate a square or two of the toasted cheese and drank a glass of warm milk and was nodding off at the table. Stephen picked her up and took her to her cabin and woke her so that she could go to the quarter gallery and change into her nightdress. He kissed her forehead and lifted her into her hammock. “Do you want me to leave the lantern lit. I’ll just close the cover a little. Is that …” He stopped when he saw she was already asleep and left the cabin.
Jack smiled at Stephen took his hand and kissed it. “And how has your first day been Papa? Is she asleep?”
“Yes, she fell asleep as soon as she was in her hammock, like a certain person I know. Don’t mock Jack. My day has been tiring and somewhat surprising. Brigid has shocked me so.”
“You mean that little conversation you had on the beach. You deflected my question in your usual style so I gathered something was bothering you. Can you tell me now that we are alone?”
Stephen looked down and then back up and nodded, “Yes, it concerns you as well as me. It seems Brigid has a gift she has kept a secret from me until today. She believes that she sees colours around people, people she is interested in, she does not bother with others. They tell her in a way she cannot explain or rather she senses that person’s feelings towards others as well as herself from these colours, maybe she means energies and just does not have the words. I don’t know. She certainly senses something of our feelings for each other, feelings please mark my words. I don’t believe she can see thoughts but she has formed a quite accurate picture of our relationship.”
Jack looked uneasy. “She isn’t going to tell …”
“No, no …. She just senses feelings. Brigid does not nor would I hope she would know what sensual or rather sexual thoughts felt like. No, she is not aware of the physicality of our relationship but rather the more important bond, the love that we share.”
Jack relaxed back in his chair, “Well that’s all right. Why has she kept it a secret?”
“Padeen quite wisely told her it was better not to talk about it or people would consider her mad or strange. I think it is probably for the best. I now think Padeen must have similar talents. He is a very empathetic creature. The odd thing is he claims she must have got this talent from me. I don’t remember anything like this but parts of my memories relating to my childhood are disjointed and I … He claimed something or someone must have hurt me badly and that would have made me stop using this gift or power call it what you will.” He shook his head again and looked confused.
“Perhaps you do use it but you’re not aware you are using it. I have watched you with your patients. There does seem to be a link or bond that you use to reach them to encourage them or just to ease their pain. I have felt this myself and seen it many a time. I might have said it was magic, but I know you wouldn’t approve, but maybe you do have this gift but it is buried under all that knowledge and reason and thinking, you just don’t allow yourself to see it.” Jack smiled at him and leaned forward and kissed him.
Stephen smiled and leant forward and whispered, “Does that kiss indicate a desire to investigate other possibilities in your cot?”
“Yes, my dear I intend to resume cultivating that bond between us.” He pulled Stephen up and led him to their cabin.
Brigid woke an hour or so later sensing something odd about her father and Uncle Jack. They were happy but seemed very excited, something like when Mama was alive and Papa was with her at night. Curious, she rolled out of her hammock and opened her cabin door and went to their cabin and heard strange muffled moans. She pushed the door open and saw Uncle Jack and Papa on a mattress on the floor with no clothes on. Uncle Jack was holding Papa tight and kissing him and pushing against him. She was confused and a little frightened now. Uncle Jack was not hurting Papa and she could feel Papa’s joy but she didn’t understand and now was worried they would be angry if they saw her and she slipped out of the cabin and closed the door and turned to see Killick staring at her.
“Miss Brigid what have you done?” He stopped and listened for a few seconds to confirm something and looked horrified. He led her back to her cabin. He looked at her more closely and saw she was frightened. “Shh, my dear … what did you see?”
She looked up at him and whispered, “Uncle Jack was holding Papa so tight and moving against him and kissing him. They seemed very happy and excited but what were they doing? I know Uncle Jack wasn’t hurting Papa. I’ve never seen the colours so bright streaming from both of them. What is it?”
“Miss Brigid, you stay here and I will be back in a little while with Dr Jacob.”
“They are not sick or hurt. I would know that right away. I would have felt it.”
“No, of course not my dear. He might explain it better than I can.”
She nodded and got into her hammock, sensing the feelings still flowing from her Papa and Uncle Jack. They seemed to grow and grow and both of their colours seemed to mix into each other and she felt a sensation so piercing and thoroughly delightful that made her whole body tingle. What were they doing that made them feel this way?
Amos and Killick were standing at the entrance to her cabin and heard the two men’s climax and saw Brigid’s body go stiff and then relax and a smile spread across her face and then she wriggled a little and relaxed and then looked totally confused.
She blinked, once, twice and then looked up and whispered, “I think they have gone to sleep.”
Killick backed away and stood in front of the Admiral’s cabin door while Amos quietly closed the other cabin door. He stood beside the hammock and placed a hand on her forehead, “Are you feeling well Brigid?”
“Oh yes, what were those wonderful feelings coming from Uncle Jack and Papa? I felt tingly all over. It was lovely.”
He reached out and held her hand. “Dear Miss Brigid when two older people like your Papa and Uncle Jack …”
They could now hear Jack’s snores and Brigid giggled and then stopped and looked at Amos again.
“As I was saying when two older people are alone together in a sleeping place or a bedroom, they like to be private. If you enter the room you may upset them. What your Papa was doing with your uncle is special for them and they want to be alone with each other. It is not something they wish to share with other people. Do you understand?”
She nodded but looked unhappy, “So I can’t share this thing with them when they are so happy.”
He smiled now, “No my dear, you have to grow up and experience it yourself with someone who is very special to you. It is very important that you don’t talk about this to anyone on this ship or any other ship in the squadron and not to anyone at home. Do you understand?”
She nodded and now looked uncertain, “Is it bad what they are doing?”
He shook his head, “No my dear, they are just loving each other. They need to be with each other this way but no one else must know as it is very precious and must be kept a secret. Can you do this to protect your Papa and your Uncle Jack?”
She nodded, “Yes Dr Jacob, I will protect them. No one will know about their loving, but I’m sure anyone with eyes to see could see that anyway.” She shrugged. “The only problem is Papa is so loud. I can feel his emotions so clear, it is hard to ignore.”
“Well just don’t talk about it to anyone.”
“Yes, sir. Can I go to sleep now?”
“Good night my dear.”
He closed the door and turned to Killick who motioned to him to go into the dining cabin.
“What do we do sir? I don’t fancy talking to the Doctor or the Admiral about this.”
“I have talked to Brigid and explained that she must respect her father’s privacy. She is an intelligent girl and she has promised not to tell anyone of what she saw. I’m not quite sure she really understands. She may understand in a few years’ time. I see no point in bringing it up with either of them at this time. So, we will keep this between ourselves. Are we agreed?”
“Yes, sir. But what if …”
“If something goes wrong, I will talk to the Doctor myself, until then are we agreed?”
“Yes sir. Good night sir. Thank you for coming up and speaking to Miss Brigid.”
Brigid never told her Papa and never told anyone else of what she had seen but she did enjoy some nights those tingly sensations when she woke up and felt her Papa’s joy.
Rating: R-ish, not particularly explicit
Title: Brigid’s Gift
Characters: Stephen Maturin, Jack Aubrey, Brigid Maturin, Killick, Amos Jacob, Mr Wells, Mr Reade
Disclaimer: They belong to Patrick O'Brian, I'm just borrowing them for a while.
Brigid’s Gift - Part 2
They spent the rest of the afternoon wandering through the penguin colony. Brigid laughed when she first heard their cries, “They sound like donkeys, not birds.”
“That is why they are called Jackass penguins. See they make burrows in the layer of guano atop the rock shelf. They lay their eggs there and once the chick is hatched one of the parents goes out to sea to catch squid and small fish and crustacea to feed themselves and their young while the other stays to protect the chick. They regurgitate some of the catch to feed their young. See there, a parent is feeding one of their chicks.”
“Is that the mother?” Asked Brigid.
“I’m not sure, the bird would have to be examined more closely to determine that. Both parents share feeding responsibilities and probably mate for life.”
Jack wrinkled his nose, “I wouldn’t fancy being a penguin chick. Hatched into a hole in the, oh …. What was that word you used Stephen?”
“Guano or to use a perfectly adequate English term, shit. Really Jack my Brigid is not such a shrinking violet that she is shocked by the word, but guano is a more scientifically accurate term.”
“I’m sure it is, if you say so Stephen. I’ll just go back to the boat. This place reeks a bit too much for me.”
Brigid looked up at Stephen and he grinned at her, “Your Uncle Jack has a very delicate nose.” She laughed and nodded.
They were left alone together as even Mr Wells preferred to retreat to the boat. Abruptly Brigid said, “Uncle Jack may not like this place but he likes touching you.”
Stephen surprised, looked down at her, “Yes he does. But why do you say that?”
She shrugged, “I feel it from you and him when ever you touch each other.”
“Feel it?” he prompted.
“The colours and energy around you change. You love Uncle Jack very much. Do you love him more than you loved Mama or the same? Your colours changed when you touched her. I saw that too.”
He stepped back, now slightly alarmed. “Do you see these colours around other people too? How do you know what the change in colours mean?”
“Padeen can do it and he told me that you could do this too when you were a child. I only have this gift because of you. He also said you stopped looking some time in the past because someone or something hurt you and you shrunk back into yourself. Were you too afraid to look any more? I know when I was very little and alone, I didn’t want to look because it hurt my head. Padeen made me look and helped me to only let the important people into my head. So, I saw you and Clarissa and Aunt Sophie and Uncle Jack and George, only people I like. I don’t take notice of the colours of those people who don’t interest me. The meanings of colours? I just feel them, there are no thoughts, just feelings. I can’t explain more than that.” She looked down.
This was the longest speech that Brigid had made to Stephen and he was disturbed, he stammered, “So just feelings, no direct thoughts.”
She nodded her head and looked down aware of his discomfort. She bit her lips and looked up at him, tears forming in her eyes, “You’re not angry with me?”
Stephen shook his head and knelt beside her and held her close, “Never in life my dear sweet Brigid. You are my dearest child, I could not love you more my dear. I was just surprised. Why didn’t you tell me of this before?”
She whispered, “Padeen thought it was better to keep it a secret. People would think I was strange, mad. And … you weren’t at home much for me to tell you.”
He looked stricken. She clasped his face, “Don’t be sad Papa. I don’t want to make you sad.”
He kissed her cheek and stood up and smiled down at her caressing her hair, “No my dear, you don’t. I was just feeling guilty and maybe a little sad because I have been away from you too long.”
She smiled up at him, “But you had to be with Uncle Jack, he needs you so much. He can’t be happy without you.”
“I see you know me and Uncle Jack much better than I thought. Come my dear, shall we go back to the boat?”
He held her hand and they walked back to the boat.
Jack had been watching them and was curious. “Stephen is everything all right?”
“Yes, oh yes, just a surprising discovery about my Brigid, a delightful surprise.” He smiled down at her and squeezed her hand. “Let’s go home.”
They returned to the ship and had a quiet supper with Brigid who was now, after the excitements of the day feeling very tired. She ate a square or two of the toasted cheese and drank a glass of warm milk and was nodding off at the table. Stephen picked her up and took her to her cabin and woke her so that she could go to the quarter gallery and change into her nightdress. He kissed her forehead and lifted her into her hammock. “Do you want me to leave the lantern lit. I’ll just close the cover a little. Is that …” He stopped when he saw she was already asleep and left the cabin.
Jack smiled at Stephen took his hand and kissed it. “And how has your first day been Papa? Is she asleep?”
“Yes, she fell asleep as soon as she was in her hammock, like a certain person I know. Don’t mock Jack. My day has been tiring and somewhat surprising. Brigid has shocked me so.”
“You mean that little conversation you had on the beach. You deflected my question in your usual style so I gathered something was bothering you. Can you tell me now that we are alone?”
Stephen looked down and then back up and nodded, “Yes, it concerns you as well as me. It seems Brigid has a gift she has kept a secret from me until today. She believes that she sees colours around people, people she is interested in, she does not bother with others. They tell her in a way she cannot explain or rather she senses that person’s feelings towards others as well as herself from these colours, maybe she means energies and just does not have the words. I don’t know. She certainly senses something of our feelings for each other, feelings please mark my words. I don’t believe she can see thoughts but she has formed a quite accurate picture of our relationship.”
Jack looked uneasy. “She isn’t going to tell …”
“No, no …. She just senses feelings. Brigid does not nor would I hope she would know what sensual or rather sexual thoughts felt like. No, she is not aware of the physicality of our relationship but rather the more important bond, the love that we share.”
Jack relaxed back in his chair, “Well that’s all right. Why has she kept it a secret?”
“Padeen quite wisely told her it was better not to talk about it or people would consider her mad or strange. I think it is probably for the best. I now think Padeen must have similar talents. He is a very empathetic creature. The odd thing is he claims she must have got this talent from me. I don’t remember anything like this but parts of my memories relating to my childhood are disjointed and I … He claimed something or someone must have hurt me badly and that would have made me stop using this gift or power call it what you will.” He shook his head again and looked confused.
“Perhaps you do use it but you’re not aware you are using it. I have watched you with your patients. There does seem to be a link or bond that you use to reach them to encourage them or just to ease their pain. I have felt this myself and seen it many a time. I might have said it was magic, but I know you wouldn’t approve, but maybe you do have this gift but it is buried under all that knowledge and reason and thinking, you just don’t allow yourself to see it.” Jack smiled at him and leaned forward and kissed him.
Stephen smiled and leant forward and whispered, “Does that kiss indicate a desire to investigate other possibilities in your cot?”
“Yes, my dear I intend to resume cultivating that bond between us.” He pulled Stephen up and led him to their cabin.
Brigid woke an hour or so later sensing something odd about her father and Uncle Jack. They were happy but seemed very excited, something like when Mama was alive and Papa was with her at night. Curious, she rolled out of her hammock and opened her cabin door and went to their cabin and heard strange muffled moans. She pushed the door open and saw Uncle Jack and Papa on a mattress on the floor with no clothes on. Uncle Jack was holding Papa tight and kissing him and pushing against him. She was confused and a little frightened now. Uncle Jack was not hurting Papa and she could feel Papa’s joy but she didn’t understand and now was worried they would be angry if they saw her and she slipped out of the cabin and closed the door and turned to see Killick staring at her.
“Miss Brigid what have you done?” He stopped and listened for a few seconds to confirm something and looked horrified. He led her back to her cabin. He looked at her more closely and saw she was frightened. “Shh, my dear … what did you see?”
She looked up at him and whispered, “Uncle Jack was holding Papa so tight and moving against him and kissing him. They seemed very happy and excited but what were they doing? I know Uncle Jack wasn’t hurting Papa. I’ve never seen the colours so bright streaming from both of them. What is it?”
“Miss Brigid, you stay here and I will be back in a little while with Dr Jacob.”
“They are not sick or hurt. I would know that right away. I would have felt it.”
“No, of course not my dear. He might explain it better than I can.”
She nodded and got into her hammock, sensing the feelings still flowing from her Papa and Uncle Jack. They seemed to grow and grow and both of their colours seemed to mix into each other and she felt a sensation so piercing and thoroughly delightful that made her whole body tingle. What were they doing that made them feel this way?
Amos and Killick were standing at the entrance to her cabin and heard the two men’s climax and saw Brigid’s body go stiff and then relax and a smile spread across her face and then she wriggled a little and relaxed and then looked totally confused.
She blinked, once, twice and then looked up and whispered, “I think they have gone to sleep.”
Killick backed away and stood in front of the Admiral’s cabin door while Amos quietly closed the other cabin door. He stood beside the hammock and placed a hand on her forehead, “Are you feeling well Brigid?”
“Oh yes, what were those wonderful feelings coming from Uncle Jack and Papa? I felt tingly all over. It was lovely.”
He reached out and held her hand. “Dear Miss Brigid when two older people like your Papa and Uncle Jack …”
They could now hear Jack’s snores and Brigid giggled and then stopped and looked at Amos again.
“As I was saying when two older people are alone together in a sleeping place or a bedroom, they like to be private. If you enter the room you may upset them. What your Papa was doing with your uncle is special for them and they want to be alone with each other. It is not something they wish to share with other people. Do you understand?”
She nodded but looked unhappy, “So I can’t share this thing with them when they are so happy.”
He smiled now, “No my dear, you have to grow up and experience it yourself with someone who is very special to you. It is very important that you don’t talk about this to anyone on this ship or any other ship in the squadron and not to anyone at home. Do you understand?”
She nodded and now looked uncertain, “Is it bad what they are doing?”
He shook his head, “No my dear, they are just loving each other. They need to be with each other this way but no one else must know as it is very precious and must be kept a secret. Can you do this to protect your Papa and your Uncle Jack?”
She nodded, “Yes Dr Jacob, I will protect them. No one will know about their loving, but I’m sure anyone with eyes to see could see that anyway.” She shrugged. “The only problem is Papa is so loud. I can feel his emotions so clear, it is hard to ignore.”
“Well just don’t talk about it to anyone.”
“Yes, sir. Can I go to sleep now?”
“Good night my dear.”
He closed the door and turned to Killick who motioned to him to go into the dining cabin.
“What do we do sir? I don’t fancy talking to the Doctor or the Admiral about this.”
“I have talked to Brigid and explained that she must respect her father’s privacy. She is an intelligent girl and she has promised not to tell anyone of what she saw. I’m not quite sure she really understands. She may understand in a few years’ time. I see no point in bringing it up with either of them at this time. So, we will keep this between ourselves. Are we agreed?”
“Yes, sir. But what if …”
“If something goes wrong, I will talk to the Doctor myself, until then are we agreed?”
“Yes sir. Good night sir. Thank you for coming up and speaking to Miss Brigid.”
Brigid never told her Papa and never told anyone else of what she had seen but she did enjoy some nights those tingly sensations when she woke up and felt her Papa’s joy.