Anything Goes Meme!

Jul 23, 2010 22:15

What you've always wanted to ask for, but never dared to ( Read more... )

fanfiction, meme: anything goes, fanart

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HMS Ark Part 1 anonymous August 5 2010, 05:22:02 UTC
Once upon a time, there was a cheerful young sea-officer named Jack. He went to a concert, where a sour rude man jabbed him with his elbow. Jack left the concert very sad. But at home, he found out he had been made captain! Jack was happy again.

The next morning, Jack saw the sour rude man in the street, and apologized for making him (the man) be rude to him (Jack) at the concert. The sour man looked less sour and politely invited Jack to join him for hot chocolate. Jack learned that the man was a doctor named Stephen. They drank their chocolate and talked together for a long time.

Now, we see that:
Jack was tall. Stephen was short.
Jack had long golden locks. Stephen covered his sparse dark hair with a scruffy wig.
Jack had bright blue eyes. Stephen had pale colorless eyes.
Jack was big and burly. Stephen was scrawny and thin.

Jack was handsome, but did not know it.
Stephen was ugly, but did not care (much).

Stephen was of illegitimate birth. Jack was heir to the lord of the manor.
Stephen was Catholic. Jack was Church of England.

Stephen was Irish and Catalan. Jack was English.
Stephen spoke many languages. Jack spoke English.

Stephen attended Trinity College in Dublin.
Jack attended a dame's school in the village.

Stephen was intelligent and knowledgeable about many things, including physic, natural philosophy, art and literature, the classics, politics, and world cultures.
Jack was intelligent and knowledgeable about all things nautical.

Stephen was an honourable man who believed that devious methods may be used to defeat a vicious tyrant.
Jack was an honourable man who could not lie his way out of a paper bag.

Stephen was often morose and melancholy. Jack was nearly always cheerful and happy.

Jack believed in the King, authority, and the navy hierarchy.
Stephen believed in freedom and independence.

Jack was punctual. Stephen often lost track of time.
Jack was neat in his dress. Stephen often lost track of his clothes.

Stephen was a physician. His job was to heal people.
Jack was in the Navy. His job was to kill people.

Jack enjoyed music and played the violin.
Stephen enjoyed music and played the violincello.

So naturally, they fell in love.

Now Jack was a creature of the sea, at home on any type of sea-going vessel. Jack often got into trouble on land, like calling out rude men at concerts, or sleeping with his superior officer's wife.

Stephen was a creature of the land, preferring solid ground beneath his feet and birds overhead, with every kind and type of creature creeping, crawling, slithering, hopping, jumping or walking about him. Stephen often got into trouble at sea, like falling down hatchways, or falling into the water and nearly drowning, or being late.

But since they were in love, Jack and Stephen decided always to be together, and they made this plan: Stephen would sail with Jack on his ships, and Jack would take him to visit strange new lands with wondrous new creatures no one had ever seen before. So for years and years Stephen sailed with Jack on each of his different ships to all different parts of the world. And Jack kept his promise, and took Stephen to each of the wondrous strange new lands they passed. Usually. Sometimes. Well, he did on occasion, subject to the requirements of the service, unless there was not a moment to lose. But still they were in love, and they were very happy together.

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Re: HMS Ark Part 1 - Swiss, is that you? anonymous August 5 2010, 07:51:21 UTC
Oh, this is brilliant. It's cracking me up so bad already, I can't wait to see where you take it.

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Re: HMS Ark Part 1 - Swiss, is that you? anonymous August 5 2010, 18:26:58 UTC
Uh-oh, pressure's on now :-) I'm glad you're enjoying it so far - thanks for your comment!

A J/S comparison I forgot to include:
Stephen enjoyed naturalizing and could identify many birds, plants, and animals by sight.
Jack enjoyed eating, and could identify many puddings by sight.

P.S. Sorry, I'm not Swiss! (though I love Swiss' work - especially the stick-figure vids! Talk about brilliant!)

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Re: HMS Ark Part 1 - Swiss, is that you? anonymous August 8 2010, 21:59:31 UTC
Puddings! Ha ha ha!

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Re: HMS Ark Part 1 anonymous August 7 2010, 07:37:37 UTC
So naturally, they fell in love.

Naturally. :)

or sleeping with his superior officer's wife

These things happen! You get distracted by how the solid ground is not moving just one second, and the next thing you know you are cuckolding your superior!

And Jack kept his promise, and took Stephen to each of the wondrous strange new lands they passed. Usually. Sometimes. Well, he did on occasion, subject to the requirements of the service, unless there was not a moment to lose.

XD

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