(no subject)
I wonder what truly changes people. I've noticed the changes people take, and it is sort of like spiraling outwards. Everyone changes all the time in high school, but now people are starting to take more shape which minor changes...or at least it seems like. I think I have changed a lot since the end of the school year. I can remember a time when I didn't know what I would do if I didn't have a friend around me at all times. The thought of not being over at Eric's house every night was the most horrifying though imaginable. Tonight, I spent the evening reading and playing guitar, and now I am going to go to bed because I must awaken early in the morn. I had invitations to go out, but I declined. I feel bad because I have tried so hard for so many years to keep so many relationships with so many people strong, and now I have let a lot of them crumble. When I think about the next two years of my life, all I think of it as is a wall in the way. Granted, I don't know what is on the other side of the wall, there is a compelling force telling me to climb over it, knock it down, develop a method of passing though solid objects, or something of the sort. I wish God would come to me and make himself apparent. Life would be more interesting this way.