my life is confusing

[pepelepei]

so...i thought i was doing good...i wasnt. i still am in love with him...at a performance i had asked him to consider giving us a shot next semester and he agreed to consider. then i stumbled upon new guy and things took off to a point, nothing serious happened. but today i realized that i still think about him alot more than i should if i was truly over him...and that was realized when i told him not to worry about considering and he asked why. i feel if it really wasnt a deal, or he wasnt considering anything it just would have been okay, not why. why says something could be there to me. i could be reading too deep into this which is why i am, hopefully, going to talk to him later tonight. i dont want to rush a decision, but i dont want to wait all semester but thats something i shall discuss with him.

thankfully the new guy understands and we will just be friends for now.