Por si éramos pocos by Belenuski - Chapter 8 (Part 9)
Title: Por si éramos pocos by Belenuski
Rating: PG-13
NB: Okay, this a shorter update than normal, but after this there's only one part left to finish the second and the second volume, so I'll try to get the next part out soon. Oh, and *hugs* to all of you...y'all are going to need one, methinks. :-/
Aitor took the stairs down to the hotel lobby. He had lost track of David and he was a little worried. David hadn’t seemed like he was enjoying himself that evening, and as a colleague, Aitor knew something was wrong. He heard David get out of bed and leave the room, but he had been gone for a long time and he thought maybe it’d be best to go looking for him. Without glancing towards the windows, he went down the stairs and peered around the bar. He continued to wonder about David’s whereabouts until, suddenly, all thoughts of locating him vanished.
Walking back to the stairs, he saw Pepa sitting on the bottom step, gazing at the wall in front of her with her face covered in tears and her hands clenched into fists. He hesitated in getting closer, but finally he went up to her.
“Pepa?” He asked. She lifted her head to look at him. “What happened? What’s wrong…?”
Pepa threw her arms around Aitor and hugged him, receiving a caring squeeze in return. She began to cry even harder and Aitor realized she was trembling when they finally parted.
“I don’t know what to do…I don’t know what to do…” She mumbled, her eyes shut tight. Aitor hugged her again with worry.
“Shhh…let’s go to my room and talk, okay? Come on.”
He helped her get to her feet and she tried to wipe away her tears, but they wouldn’t stop falling.
Aitor walked up the stairs and was about to walk out into the hallway, but Pepa stopped him.
“Not that way…let’s…let’s go around.”
Aitor, confused, just nodded. There was something in that hallway that the brunette didn’t want to see. Going through another hallway would mean a longer route, but of course he would do it for her. He had already gotten used to do things he didn’t want to do just for the woman he was in love with.
Silvia found herself stroking her wedding wing and her previously blank mind was quickly filled with words, with gestures, with people…and David wasn’t amongst those people. Snapping out of her reverie, she brusquely pulled away from him and, without daring to look at him, she covered her mouth with her hand, feeling guilty.
“Silvia?” He asked, taking a step closer to her.
“No.” She said as she stretched out her arm to impede him. “No.”
David, completely confused, tried to step closer again, but she took a step back.
“What’s wrong?”
“I’ve already chosen.” Their eyes met. “I’ve already chosen and it’s not you.”
The redhead began to understand everything. Her heart beat when she kissed David not out of love, but from the overwhelming feeling of it not being Pepa. She was happy to see David during their breaks because he provided a way for her to think about Pepa. Knowing that what she was doing was wrong, she thought of Pepa as her wife again, as the person she was in love with. Deep down, everything had been about her…for Pepa, for her wife.
Her world that had collapsed during the kiss was being rebuilt at a breakneck speed. All the moments, the words, the feelings…they were all with that brunette with green eyes with whom she felt she was destined to share them. And now, looking at David, she realized her error in having doubts and trying to clear them up with a simple kiss. She finally understood Pepa, the instability of them both and, more importantly, her doubts and fears immediately disappeared.
“But, Silvia…” David began.
“You said that everything would be cleared up with a kiss, no?” She looked at him, serious, sure. “I don’t know whether to thank you or shoot myself for being an idiot, but clear things up I have.”
She didn’t say goodbye to him, or even spare him another glance. She didn’t know what time it was, it could’ve been three in the morning, or four, it didn’t really matter. But now she felt capable of waking Pepa up, asking her forgiveness for everything, and as Pepa had been thinking all evening though Silvia didn’t know it, asking to start anew. She wanted to tell her, simply, that she loved her.
She left David, who banged his fist against the small, decorative table, behind her and knocked on Sara’s and Pepa’s door. Three hard knocks. Her heart raced with nerves and emotion, like a schoolgirl.
Sara walked out half-alseep.
“Tita? Is something wrong?”
“I have to speak with Pepa.”
“Well, she’s not here…she left some time ago.”
Silvia frowned. Pepa wasn’t there? Where had she gone? Well, even better, now she wouldn’t have to wake her up and Pepa would be able to heary everything with clarity.
She said goodbye to her niece with one last quick wave and headed to her own room so she could put on some clothes before going downstairs, but just as she was about to slide the card into the groove, she saw two bodies holding each other and walking into the room down the hall. David and Aitor’s room. And the two bodies were Aitor himself and Pepa.
It was a tense moment.
They both looked at each other. Pepa had just stopped crying and her eyes, looking so empty, met Silvia’s who was taking in the sight. The redhead shut out any negative thoughts that tried to fight their way to the front of her mind. She had blamed Pepa once before, only to go and commit the same mistake herself. She wasn’t going to judge this time. Aitor was just a friend, and the truth was, Pepa didn’t exactly look happy at the moment. With the card still in her hand, she turned to walk over and stand in front of the other two. And now what?
Pepa, meanwhile, was completely lost. Not knowing what to want or what to do, only knowing that she was hurt, and that she couldn’t take the situation anymore. She pulled away from Aitor slowly, and he distanced himself a bit, but quickly realized he wasn’t needed, but instead of going back in the room, he headed downstairs.
He walked back down the stairs not quite knowing how he wanted their discussion to end. But no matter what happened, he wanted his best friend to be happy. He wanted the woman he was in love with to stop crying.
Pepa didn’t make any special gestures. She merely walked into Aitor’s room with the card he had given her and sat down on the bed, knowing that sooner or later, the woman who had been her wife for several years would eventually follow her in.
Effectively, the redhead walked in and closed the door behind her, flicking on the lights.
“Pepa,” she began. “Look, I’ve been thinking and…”
“I saw you kissing him, "she said seriously. She didn’t sound angry so much, more like absent. But the words were like a stab to Silvia’s chest.
“I can explain.”
“No. Now you be quiet…and we’ll finally fucking finish this.”
She seemed so destroyed…the brunette dropped her gaze from Silvia’s and looked down at the floor, holding her head between her hands, like when she would get sick to her stomach. And she did feel like vomiting, as she usually did when she was nervous.
“I’m sorry…and it doesn’t matter to me anymore what happened with Aitor, I just know that…”
“Don’t say it, please.” Pepa closed her eyes. She had a bad taste in her mouth, but she controlled the urge to vomit. She rose on shaky legs to change positions and she saw Silvia’s eyes fill with tears. But, even so, neither one of them cried. They had cried so much already and now they needed to talk. And it was difficult to talk through tears. “Now I understand you. The feeling of not being able to take it anymore, of reaching the limit…of being tired of living like this. And now I regret not taking that break that we needed. In the end, the situation has gotten to the point…the point where…”
“Where we can’t continue anymore.”
There was silence between them. Silvia wiped a stray tear from her cheek. The only one she’d let fall in front of Pepa.
She had arrived here with the intention of telling Pepa just the opposite, that she wanted to try starting over again, but instead here they were talking about leaving it all behind, about ending their relationship. She knew how Pepa felt because she had felt that way a million times, and though Pepa had never understood her, that didn’t matter just now. Neither one was interested in throwing anything in the other’s face. They knew that they had both fucked up. That one of them had let a simple kiss with someone else in a locker room almost become something more. And that the other had let someone kiss her and had responded out of her own doubts…and they both suffered.
They didn’t know anymore if they wanted to clear things up for themselves or for each other. At this point, the only thing they knew for certain was that they should be brave, in both the good and bad moments.
And what was coming wasn’t good.
Pepa looked at her right hand and raised it to Silvia so she could also see it. Without resentment, without hate. More like sadness. She took the ring off her finger and after a few bitter seconds of staring at it, she left it on the bed.
“It’s over,” she said, attempting to keep her voice from breaking.
Silvia nodded slowly. Her hand shook so hard it was difficult for her to get the ring off, but when she did, she slipped it into her pocket.
____________________________________________________
Links to the original story:
http://pepaysilvia.mforos.com/1469855/8481210-por-si-eramos-pocos-01-11-09-23-40/
http://pepaysilvia.mforos.com/1469855/8680673-por-si-eramos-pocos-ii-28-11-09-21-35/
http://pepaysilvia.mforos.com/1469855/8848739-por-si-eramos-pocos-iii-14-02-10-0-55-finalizado/
Rating: PG-13
NB: Okay, this a shorter update than normal, but after this there's only one part left to finish the second and the second volume, so I'll try to get the next part out soon. Oh, and *hugs* to all of you...y'all are going to need one, methinks. :-/
Aitor took the stairs down to the hotel lobby. He had lost track of David and he was a little worried. David hadn’t seemed like he was enjoying himself that evening, and as a colleague, Aitor knew something was wrong. He heard David get out of bed and leave the room, but he had been gone for a long time and he thought maybe it’d be best to go looking for him. Without glancing towards the windows, he went down the stairs and peered around the bar. He continued to wonder about David’s whereabouts until, suddenly, all thoughts of locating him vanished.
Walking back to the stairs, he saw Pepa sitting on the bottom step, gazing at the wall in front of her with her face covered in tears and her hands clenched into fists. He hesitated in getting closer, but finally he went up to her.
“Pepa?” He asked. She lifted her head to look at him. “What happened? What’s wrong…?”
Pepa threw her arms around Aitor and hugged him, receiving a caring squeeze in return. She began to cry even harder and Aitor realized she was trembling when they finally parted.
“I don’t know what to do…I don’t know what to do…” She mumbled, her eyes shut tight. Aitor hugged her again with worry.
“Shhh…let’s go to my room and talk, okay? Come on.”
He helped her get to her feet and she tried to wipe away her tears, but they wouldn’t stop falling.
Aitor walked up the stairs and was about to walk out into the hallway, but Pepa stopped him.
“Not that way…let’s…let’s go around.”
Aitor, confused, just nodded. There was something in that hallway that the brunette didn’t want to see. Going through another hallway would mean a longer route, but of course he would do it for her. He had already gotten used to do things he didn’t want to do just for the woman he was in love with.
Silvia found herself stroking her wedding wing and her previously blank mind was quickly filled with words, with gestures, with people…and David wasn’t amongst those people. Snapping out of her reverie, she brusquely pulled away from him and, without daring to look at him, she covered her mouth with her hand, feeling guilty.
“Silvia?” He asked, taking a step closer to her.
“No.” She said as she stretched out her arm to impede him. “No.”
David, completely confused, tried to step closer again, but she took a step back.
“What’s wrong?”
“I’ve already chosen.” Their eyes met. “I’ve already chosen and it’s not you.”
The redhead began to understand everything. Her heart beat when she kissed David not out of love, but from the overwhelming feeling of it not being Pepa. She was happy to see David during their breaks because he provided a way for her to think about Pepa. Knowing that what she was doing was wrong, she thought of Pepa as her wife again, as the person she was in love with. Deep down, everything had been about her…for Pepa, for her wife.
Her world that had collapsed during the kiss was being rebuilt at a breakneck speed. All the moments, the words, the feelings…they were all with that brunette with green eyes with whom she felt she was destined to share them. And now, looking at David, she realized her error in having doubts and trying to clear them up with a simple kiss. She finally understood Pepa, the instability of them both and, more importantly, her doubts and fears immediately disappeared.
“But, Silvia…” David began.
“You said that everything would be cleared up with a kiss, no?” She looked at him, serious, sure. “I don’t know whether to thank you or shoot myself for being an idiot, but clear things up I have.”
She didn’t say goodbye to him, or even spare him another glance. She didn’t know what time it was, it could’ve been three in the morning, or four, it didn’t really matter. But now she felt capable of waking Pepa up, asking her forgiveness for everything, and as Pepa had been thinking all evening though Silvia didn’t know it, asking to start anew. She wanted to tell her, simply, that she loved her.
She left David, who banged his fist against the small, decorative table, behind her and knocked on Sara’s and Pepa’s door. Three hard knocks. Her heart raced with nerves and emotion, like a schoolgirl.
Sara walked out half-alseep.
“Tita? Is something wrong?”
“I have to speak with Pepa.”
“Well, she’s not here…she left some time ago.”
Silvia frowned. Pepa wasn’t there? Where had she gone? Well, even better, now she wouldn’t have to wake her up and Pepa would be able to heary everything with clarity.
She said goodbye to her niece with one last quick wave and headed to her own room so she could put on some clothes before going downstairs, but just as she was about to slide the card into the groove, she saw two bodies holding each other and walking into the room down the hall. David and Aitor’s room. And the two bodies were Aitor himself and Pepa.
It was a tense moment.
They both looked at each other. Pepa had just stopped crying and her eyes, looking so empty, met Silvia’s who was taking in the sight. The redhead shut out any negative thoughts that tried to fight their way to the front of her mind. She had blamed Pepa once before, only to go and commit the same mistake herself. She wasn’t going to judge this time. Aitor was just a friend, and the truth was, Pepa didn’t exactly look happy at the moment. With the card still in her hand, she turned to walk over and stand in front of the other two. And now what?
Pepa, meanwhile, was completely lost. Not knowing what to want or what to do, only knowing that she was hurt, and that she couldn’t take the situation anymore. She pulled away from Aitor slowly, and he distanced himself a bit, but quickly realized he wasn’t needed, but instead of going back in the room, he headed downstairs.
He walked back down the stairs not quite knowing how he wanted their discussion to end. But no matter what happened, he wanted his best friend to be happy. He wanted the woman he was in love with to stop crying.
Pepa didn’t make any special gestures. She merely walked into Aitor’s room with the card he had given her and sat down on the bed, knowing that sooner or later, the woman who had been her wife for several years would eventually follow her in.
Effectively, the redhead walked in and closed the door behind her, flicking on the lights.
“Pepa,” she began. “Look, I’ve been thinking and…”
“I saw you kissing him, "she said seriously. She didn’t sound angry so much, more like absent. But the words were like a stab to Silvia’s chest.
“I can explain.”
“No. Now you be quiet…and we’ll finally fucking finish this.”
She seemed so destroyed…the brunette dropped her gaze from Silvia’s and looked down at the floor, holding her head between her hands, like when she would get sick to her stomach. And she did feel like vomiting, as she usually did when she was nervous.
“I’m sorry…and it doesn’t matter to me anymore what happened with Aitor, I just know that…”
“Don’t say it, please.” Pepa closed her eyes. She had a bad taste in her mouth, but she controlled the urge to vomit. She rose on shaky legs to change positions and she saw Silvia’s eyes fill with tears. But, even so, neither one of them cried. They had cried so much already and now they needed to talk. And it was difficult to talk through tears. “Now I understand you. The feeling of not being able to take it anymore, of reaching the limit…of being tired of living like this. And now I regret not taking that break that we needed. In the end, the situation has gotten to the point…the point where…”
“Where we can’t continue anymore.”
There was silence between them. Silvia wiped a stray tear from her cheek. The only one she’d let fall in front of Pepa.
She had arrived here with the intention of telling Pepa just the opposite, that she wanted to try starting over again, but instead here they were talking about leaving it all behind, about ending their relationship. She knew how Pepa felt because she had felt that way a million times, and though Pepa had never understood her, that didn’t matter just now. Neither one was interested in throwing anything in the other’s face. They knew that they had both fucked up. That one of them had let a simple kiss with someone else in a locker room almost become something more. And that the other had let someone kiss her and had responded out of her own doubts…and they both suffered.
They didn’t know anymore if they wanted to clear things up for themselves or for each other. At this point, the only thing they knew for certain was that they should be brave, in both the good and bad moments.
And what was coming wasn’t good.
Pepa looked at her right hand and raised it to Silvia so she could also see it. Without resentment, without hate. More like sadness. She took the ring off her finger and after a few bitter seconds of staring at it, she left it on the bed.
“It’s over,” she said, attempting to keep her voice from breaking.
Silvia nodded slowly. Her hand shook so hard it was difficult for her to get the ring off, but when she did, she slipped it into her pocket.
____________________________________________________
Links to the original story:
http://pepaysilvia.mforos.com/1469855/8481210-por-si-eramos-pocos-01-11-09-23-40/
http://pepaysilvia.mforos.com/1469855/8680673-por-si-eramos-pocos-ii-28-11-09-21-35/
http://pepaysilvia.mforos.com/1469855/8848739-por-si-eramos-pocos-iii-14-02-10-0-55-finalizado/