come sail away with me...

Feb 02, 2010 14:17

Im feeling lost. I have nothing going for me in life, I have no friends(atleast that is how it feels). I actually cried myself to sleep last night. I havent done that since i left UB.

Im not depressed per se. I think this is more me wondering what I am doing in life. Yesterday I kept getting into fights with Manda. I think this happened because Im feeling empty. I cant stop from crying. And the person that I want to talk to, atleast right now, wants nothing to do with me.

When did I lose all my friends? When did my life stop being life, and started to be a routine? Maybe this is just SAD. IDK.

Maybe this is just depression talking. I know I am right(or atleast it seems like it is) when I say I have no friends. People that I thought were my friends from UB where just there to stab me in the back. I couldnt cut it there, so they cut me off from there life. Im actually happy that i have nothing, absolutely nothing to do with APO. They claim that they have a three fold purpose. But what they dont tell you is that there three fold purpose is backstabbing, hatred, and maybe a bit of service to community. that is really different then there stated three fold purpose of Friendship, Leadership, and Service.

I think that is where my life started to go wrong. I joined a group of people that I thought would be friends, if not for life, would atleast help when i needed it. And I couldnt have been more wrong.

Well, enough with this pity party.
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