Fic - First Few Desperate Hours

[sixpences]

Good grief, plot.

Fandom: Fullmetal Alchemist
Pairing/Characters: Roy/Riza, Team Mustang
Content Advisory: Sex
Words: 5,556
Summary: Isolation breeds anxiety, and some rather rash decisions. Set after chapter 62, though a little handwavy about the timeline.

Many thanks to memories_child for beta-fu.

Comments

[bob_fish]

Whoa. It is very late at night so this review may not be super-coherent, but just - whoa. Your beautiful prose makes me jealous, your manga!Roy is nuanced and clever and totally human. I love him sitting up with Flamel and a packet of biscuits, such a charming, humanising detail and more interesting than the usual fan staple of having him sit up with his emo brain and a glass of whisky (ironically, I am writing this with a glass of whisky next to me XD).

Your character work with Riza was equally wonderful, and the romantic stuff flows so naturally and effortlessly from the understated but intense feelings we see in canon. Loved her sneaky little jokes, and them playing footsie under the table. Now I am going to do that thing where you quote a whole paragraph you love:

He wants to tell her all the ridiculous things he still hasn't got around to telling her, about wanting to found a university and that weird story about horses from the city paper last week and how he managed to let a bit of bacon catch on fire when he'd picked up a

[anat_astarte]

I totally agree with this comment. Fantastic job author!

[sixpences]

Thank you!

[sixpences]

Thank you! Long comments are the best! I'm really glad Roy and Riza work so well for you here- the biscuits thing is one of my own favourite bits. I honestly can't see manga!Roy as being a big drinker- he's too disciplined. And biscuits and a comfort book is much less wangsty *g*.

The tachi are just too much love, I had fun with them (and Roy-Havoc banter is almost as good as Roy-Ed banter!).

[bob_fish]

My beta and I have been having this exact conversation recently! Manga Roy is definitely not an emo drinker. In fact, I imagine him as amusingly lightweight on those occasions he's out with Havoc and Breda (and how much would they be entertained by that?). I was joking with her before I read this about writing a scene where he can't sleep/has one of those angsty Ishbal dreams, and stays up with a glass of warm milk and his favourite novel - as a counterpoint to all that emo whisky. You practically wrote that scene! (I still might try my version, though).

Roy-Havoc banter rocks, you're right - I'm currently writing a manga ensemble piece where the two of them haven't interacted much, and trying to get a handle on writing their friendship. I can only aspire to do as good a job as you did!

[sixpences]

I was joking with her before I read this about writing a scene where he can't sleep/has one of those angsty Ishbal dreams, and stays up with a glass of warm milk and his favourite novel - as a counterpoint to all that emo whisky. You practically wrote that scene! (I still might try my version, though).

Oh you definitely should- the emo whisky needs to go down! And the thought of Roy making himself some warm milk is ridiculously adorable.

[bob_fish]

I blame anime 1.0 for all the whisky emo! Manga Roy is such a different character from his anime counterpart. And I like him when he's being adorable. XD The biscuits were pretty cute too.

[live4him4eva]

This is exactly what I was going to say, right down to the "It's very late and this review may not be very coherent."

This story was spectacular for lack of a better word. Even without the Royai goodness, this was nothing short of astounding. Your attention to little details of the story, even the parts that don't matter, but give you a better feel of everything was a marvelous touch.

Easily the best fic I've read in ages. Many, many props to you.

[sixpences]

Thank you so much! I must say, the little details of scene and character are one of my favourite things as a writer- as you say, they're not always necessary, but they give an extra dimension to things (plus, fun research!). I'm really glad the relationship stuff worked for you as well- Mustang and Hawkeye are so reserved and understated that it can be hard to convey.

[live4him4eva]

With Hawkeye and Mustang, they both convey a lot of things with each other even in silence, so small details are crucial for them. You hit that, but also went above and beyond and put little details into everything and that makes me so happy, haha.

I agree, but personally, the intimate quiet silences between them are one of the things I love most about this pairing. Patience and reservation. A fic that ends with them still waiting for the day they can legally be together is just as good for me as a fic where they hook up. ...Even though both those types of fics satisfy a different interest.