imagination run rampant
Hellloooo daaarrrlings. Ahem, yes. So, last night, during "Sex in the City" on WB17, they happened to show an advertisment for that new WB show "Supernatural". Now, as we all know, I do not do so well with the supernatural and try to avoid being reminded of it at all costs. Yes, well, this ad caught me by surprise so I heard AND watched it. In the next epidsode they're dealing with the whole "Bloody Mary" rumour. You know, the one where if you say "Bloody Mary" three times into the mirror she'll appear in it? Well she definitely appeared TWICE in this ad, as a extremely creepy reddish-brown, dead-looking person. TWICE. Did I mention TWICE?? THEN, of course they showed the ad again the commercial after next. Needless to say, I spent all night when I was awake and all morning attempting desperately not to look into mirrors. You never realize how many mirrors there are in this world until you're trying to avoid them. I sucked it up and had to look in eventually, b/c the contacts needed putting in and the hair needed fixing....Bloody Mary never showed up. Of course I wasn't SAYING anything, but I sure as hell was thinking it. Yeah, I'm a nut, I know.
Funny thing today. I got to work, and didn't have my pretty heels. Shoes I had on with my snazzy suit? Argyle airwalks...shoes in my bookbag? Black flipflops. Flipflops it is. Thank goodness you can't see my feet when I'm sitting behind my desk.
I'm very confused about graduate school. #1) I've been delving further into the Cambridge thing in order to complete my application, and am discovering that the .1% chance I thought I might have of getting in (out of a small bit of egotism really) is slowly disappearing. So much so, that I really don't want to apply at all anymore. Especially now that Dr. Facknitz's recommendation hasn't come yet and it's looking like I'm going to have to overnight two seperate packages to England, which I can't really afford to do. At least not for a school that I'm pretty positive I won't have a prayer of getting into. However, this leads to me feeling like a big a-hole for stressing my profs out, who so kindly did a recommendation for me on super short notice in order for me to be able to get my Cambridge app in on time. I mean they'd probably never find out if I didn't apply. But what if they did?? I'd feel HORRIBLE. Feel free to offer advice...please. #2) I can't decide if I want to go for my PhD right now...or at all. I mean I really want to teach at university level, and for that I'd definitely need a PhD. But am I smart enough to do that? I mean, I don't want to sell myself short, I think I definitely am smart enough, but I'm also a bit of a slacker, no one will deny that. I've always floated through school. I learn, b/c I love it, but I don't do a lot of work unless I feel like it...and to be a college prof, I'd have to be publishing stuff on a semi-regular basis. Do I want to have to do that b/c i HAVE to? Then again, no one would publish anything in the historical field if it wasn't written by someone with a PhD. A masters means nothing, beyond high school teaching. If I got my masters I could teach AP History, whoot. I think I'd be happy at the high school level....but am I selling myself short b/c I'm a slacker? B/c I don't want to deal with the work and expense and crap I'm gonna have to go through to get a PhD? I mean, once I'm there it won't be so bad probably...but just thinking about it stresses me out. I won't want to do a half-ass job, I'll want to be the best and part of me feels like when/if I fall a little short of that, I'll be really dissapointed. Phew...anyway....
Peace kids.
Funny thing today. I got to work, and didn't have my pretty heels. Shoes I had on with my snazzy suit? Argyle airwalks...shoes in my bookbag? Black flipflops. Flipflops it is. Thank goodness you can't see my feet when I'm sitting behind my desk.
I'm very confused about graduate school. #1) I've been delving further into the Cambridge thing in order to complete my application, and am discovering that the .1% chance I thought I might have of getting in (out of a small bit of egotism really) is slowly disappearing. So much so, that I really don't want to apply at all anymore. Especially now that Dr. Facknitz's recommendation hasn't come yet and it's looking like I'm going to have to overnight two seperate packages to England, which I can't really afford to do. At least not for a school that I'm pretty positive I won't have a prayer of getting into. However, this leads to me feeling like a big a-hole for stressing my profs out, who so kindly did a recommendation for me on super short notice in order for me to be able to get my Cambridge app in on time. I mean they'd probably never find out if I didn't apply. But what if they did?? I'd feel HORRIBLE. Feel free to offer advice...please. #2) I can't decide if I want to go for my PhD right now...or at all. I mean I really want to teach at university level, and for that I'd definitely need a PhD. But am I smart enough to do that? I mean, I don't want to sell myself short, I think I definitely am smart enough, but I'm also a bit of a slacker, no one will deny that. I've always floated through school. I learn, b/c I love it, but I don't do a lot of work unless I feel like it...and to be a college prof, I'd have to be publishing stuff on a semi-regular basis. Do I want to have to do that b/c i HAVE to? Then again, no one would publish anything in the historical field if it wasn't written by someone with a PhD. A masters means nothing, beyond high school teaching. If I got my masters I could teach AP History, whoot. I think I'd be happy at the high school level....but am I selling myself short b/c I'm a slacker? B/c I don't want to deal with the work and expense and crap I'm gonna have to go through to get a PhD? I mean, once I'm there it won't be so bad probably...but just thinking about it stresses me out. I won't want to do a half-ass job, I'll want to be the best and part of me feels like when/if I fall a little short of that, I'll be really dissapointed. Phew...anyway....
Peace kids.