(no subject)
I feel like I'm going to throw up. I've been torturing myself by looking at other people's photos on facebook. Girls I used to know, who used to live in Florida. Girls who are younger than me and more successful and much cooler than me. Girls who dress better and are more cultured and seemingly have better, more fulfilling lives than me. Girls who aren't affected by their negative thoughts like me.
It feels like this hollow creaking ache in the pit of my stomach that crawls up my chest through my esophagus and creeps its way into my throat and just sits there until it hurts so much tears begin to well up in the corners of my eyes.
I miss Chicago so much, that's no secret. I can't wait to leave this place. I want better things for me. I don't want this retreating life I've been living recently. It isn't who I am. It's not who I am meant to be. I will get out of here again and when I do I will not be coming back.
It feels like this hollow creaking ache in the pit of my stomach that crawls up my chest through my esophagus and creeps its way into my throat and just sits there until it hurts so much tears begin to well up in the corners of my eyes.
I miss Chicago so much, that's no secret. I can't wait to leave this place. I want better things for me. I don't want this retreating life I've been living recently. It isn't who I am. It's not who I am meant to be. I will get out of here again and when I do I will not be coming back.