Searching for Hope
So work is slow again and this is an idea I came up with last night. I've just signed a new contract at work which means I will be getting a lot of extra tasks so I won't be able to write during the day for much longer but as I seem to be a bit of a writing machine at the moment I shall make the most of it!
Title: Searching for Hope
Author: Penikitty
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairing: Paul/Madeline, Caroline, mentions of Dewitt and Topher
Disclaimer: Dollhouse and the characters used in it do not belong to me, I just like to have fun with them
Word Count:1025
Summary:Caroline and Paul have gone to find a safe place for everyone and, while Caroline sleeps, Paul thinks about what has bought them to this point.
Spoilers/Warnings:Contains spoilers for season one, in particular Epitaph One.
This is un-betaed so apologies for any mistakes!
Paul watched Caroline as she slept by the fire they had built together. He should have woken her hours ago to take over guard duty but he couldn’t bear to disturb her, they got so little sleep these days. He looked around the basement of the burnt out shell of a house they had taken shelter in. The blackened walls seemed to be closing in on him, creating intense feelings of claustrophobia, and he found himself having to take deep, cleansing breaths to stay calm.
There was no moonlight to shine through the tiny broken window in the basement. Through the darkness an endless barrage of gunshots intermingled with shouts and screams of agony drifted into the basement. Paul felt the despair rising within him, threatening to take over.
Anarchy had been unleashed on this planet and Hell had found a new home.
Night was always the worst for him. Between the endless hours of not making a sound and the adrenaline burning through his veins he was constantly on edge, waiting for the next attack. The lack of movement and conversation meant that he couldn’t distract himself from thinking about the fact his planet now consisted of those who had picked up the phone and those who hadn’t.
It was all so pointless. Why would anyone want to reduce the world to nothing more than a screaming, bloody mess? So many people had been lost, good people, people who had done nothing wrong and didn’t disturb such ends.
Images of her filled his mind. His poor, sweet, Madeline. He’d bartered for her freedom but after only a few short weeks she had been back, begging to be a Doll again. He had tried to change her mind but, as recognition had filled her eyes, she told him she had nothing worth living for. She wouldn’t talk to him about her reasons but she willingly signed a contract giving up another five years of her life and just like that she was November again.
Seeing her walking around the Dollhouse, a vacant stare on her face, had almost crippled him. It was worse when she was sent out on assignments where he knew some dirty bastard was going to act out his fantasies using her body. He had never looked at her file to find out what had bought her back to the Dollhouse, if she had wanted him to know she would have told him. When the war had started Dewitt had ordered Topher to put all the original personalities back into the Dolls. When Madeline had woken up she hadn’t been happy. She had demanded to have another contract to sign and when she was told it wasn’t possible she had broken down, screaming and crying.
After a few weeks, and when she had found out what was going on in the outside world, she had begun seeking Paul out to talk to. She’d confided in him that after she had left the House memories of Mellie had come back to her, memories of him had come back to her. It was then their relationship started over again. He got to know Madeline and they fell in love only this time it had been real.
Tears began to fill his eyes. He hated thinking about this but every night was the same. His mind wouldn’t let him forget what had happened to her, he didn’t think it ever would. Although she had seemed happy with him, Madeline had slowly begun to draw into herself. She would cry at night when she thought he was asleep. She wasn’t eating. Memories of her life were consuming her, the memories she had become a Doll to escape. One night just a few short weeks ago he had woken to find the space next to him where she slept empty. He had gone searching for her but she wasn’t in the House. There was only one other place she could have gone; outside.
He had slowly made his way to the outside world, keeping low and staying quiet, a shotgun in his hands. He had found her standing in an alley next to the sewer entrance to the House. Tears were streaming down her face, her hair blowing out behind her, white ash decorating her clothes. She hadn’t even jumped when he’d approached her as if she’d been expecting him.
“Paul.” She had said, her voice tight with emotion, “I can’t live in this world. I can’t live in a place with no hope and I can’t live in a world without my little girl.”
He’d been so shocked. No one had told him she’d had a daughter. In that moment everything had clicked into place.
“I love you Paul, I truly do, but I don’t want this life. I want to be with my daughter or I want to forget. Being alive is the worst pain I have ever experienced and you can’t change that.”
He had tried to argue with her. He had cried. He had tried to force her back into the sewer. None of it had made the slightest bit of difference and he had watched helpless as she had walked away from him to where the alley led out into the street. She had only just disappeared from view when he heard an angry roar followed by a scream which was cut off abruptly. He had fled from the ally back to the safety of the House, disgusted with himself for letting her go. He should have fought harder, forced her to stay with him, anything but letting her die that way.
This was how he’d ended up here with Caroline. With Madeline gone he felt he had nothing to lose so when she had said she wanted to look for a safe place for them to go he had been the first one to volunteer...actually he’d been the only one.
So here they were, looking for a safe haven, an island of tranquillity within the madness. Caroline was so strong, so determined, that he was sure they would succeed. They had to succeed.
Without hope they had nothing.
Title: Searching for Hope
Author: Penikitty
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairing: Paul/Madeline, Caroline, mentions of Dewitt and Topher
Disclaimer: Dollhouse and the characters used in it do not belong to me, I just like to have fun with them
Word Count:1025
Summary:Caroline and Paul have gone to find a safe place for everyone and, while Caroline sleeps, Paul thinks about what has bought them to this point.
Spoilers/Warnings:Contains spoilers for season one, in particular Epitaph One.
This is un-betaed so apologies for any mistakes!
Paul watched Caroline as she slept by the fire they had built together. He should have woken her hours ago to take over guard duty but he couldn’t bear to disturb her, they got so little sleep these days. He looked around the basement of the burnt out shell of a house they had taken shelter in. The blackened walls seemed to be closing in on him, creating intense feelings of claustrophobia, and he found himself having to take deep, cleansing breaths to stay calm.
There was no moonlight to shine through the tiny broken window in the basement. Through the darkness an endless barrage of gunshots intermingled with shouts and screams of agony drifted into the basement. Paul felt the despair rising within him, threatening to take over.
Anarchy had been unleashed on this planet and Hell had found a new home.
Night was always the worst for him. Between the endless hours of not making a sound and the adrenaline burning through his veins he was constantly on edge, waiting for the next attack. The lack of movement and conversation meant that he couldn’t distract himself from thinking about the fact his planet now consisted of those who had picked up the phone and those who hadn’t.
It was all so pointless. Why would anyone want to reduce the world to nothing more than a screaming, bloody mess? So many people had been lost, good people, people who had done nothing wrong and didn’t disturb such ends.
Images of her filled his mind. His poor, sweet, Madeline. He’d bartered for her freedom but after only a few short weeks she had been back, begging to be a Doll again. He had tried to change her mind but, as recognition had filled her eyes, she told him she had nothing worth living for. She wouldn’t talk to him about her reasons but she willingly signed a contract giving up another five years of her life and just like that she was November again.
Seeing her walking around the Dollhouse, a vacant stare on her face, had almost crippled him. It was worse when she was sent out on assignments where he knew some dirty bastard was going to act out his fantasies using her body. He had never looked at her file to find out what had bought her back to the Dollhouse, if she had wanted him to know she would have told him. When the war had started Dewitt had ordered Topher to put all the original personalities back into the Dolls. When Madeline had woken up she hadn’t been happy. She had demanded to have another contract to sign and when she was told it wasn’t possible she had broken down, screaming and crying.
After a few weeks, and when she had found out what was going on in the outside world, she had begun seeking Paul out to talk to. She’d confided in him that after she had left the House memories of Mellie had come back to her, memories of him had come back to her. It was then their relationship started over again. He got to know Madeline and they fell in love only this time it had been real.
Tears began to fill his eyes. He hated thinking about this but every night was the same. His mind wouldn’t let him forget what had happened to her, he didn’t think it ever would. Although she had seemed happy with him, Madeline had slowly begun to draw into herself. She would cry at night when she thought he was asleep. She wasn’t eating. Memories of her life were consuming her, the memories she had become a Doll to escape. One night just a few short weeks ago he had woken to find the space next to him where she slept empty. He had gone searching for her but she wasn’t in the House. There was only one other place she could have gone; outside.
He had slowly made his way to the outside world, keeping low and staying quiet, a shotgun in his hands. He had found her standing in an alley next to the sewer entrance to the House. Tears were streaming down her face, her hair blowing out behind her, white ash decorating her clothes. She hadn’t even jumped when he’d approached her as if she’d been expecting him.
“Paul.” She had said, her voice tight with emotion, “I can’t live in this world. I can’t live in a place with no hope and I can’t live in a world without my little girl.”
He’d been so shocked. No one had told him she’d had a daughter. In that moment everything had clicked into place.
“I love you Paul, I truly do, but I don’t want this life. I want to be with my daughter or I want to forget. Being alive is the worst pain I have ever experienced and you can’t change that.”
He had tried to argue with her. He had cried. He had tried to force her back into the sewer. None of it had made the slightest bit of difference and he had watched helpless as she had walked away from him to where the alley led out into the street. She had only just disappeared from view when he heard an angry roar followed by a scream which was cut off abruptly. He had fled from the ally back to the safety of the House, disgusted with himself for letting her go. He should have fought harder, forced her to stay with him, anything but letting her die that way.
This was how he’d ended up here with Caroline. With Madeline gone he felt he had nothing to lose so when she had said she wanted to look for a safe place for them to go he had been the first one to volunteer...actually he’d been the only one.
So here they were, looking for a safe haven, an island of tranquillity within the madness. Caroline was so strong, so determined, that he was sure they would succeed. They had to succeed.
Without hope they had nothing.