Author’s Note: This is a follow-up to
The Doctor's Diary. I wasn’t intending this to be a series even though it seems like it should be, but I had some more ideas. I don’t know if more will strike me, but we’ll see.
Date: About five minutes from the last entry.
Am I sure I love her? I am. I really do! That’s surprising! Why am I so surprised that I love her? Why is it so shocking that she has so much power over me? River Song - water and music. Two of the most powerful yet beautiful things in the universe. One can tear down mountains; the other can elevate a man’s soul. And River does both.
How much time do I have left to love her? There’s something, how old is she? She’s part Time Lord. She could be 200 for all I know. Or older. Could she even be older than me? I don’t know if I can go by her appearance alone. Look at me. I look younger than ever. Well, except for when I was a child. Sometimes I feel like a child again. A timey-wimey space child, running across the universe. Falling, scraping a knee then jumping up to do it all over. Other times I feel more ancient than the whole of time itself.
Maybe I should ask her next time I see her. “River, how old are you?” Ooh, wait… that may just be one of those dangerous questions. That woman can go from happy to cross and back again faster than anyone I’ve ever seen. And when she slaps, she means it. I still feel the sting on my cheek from the last time I upset her. That was… well, technically, it was a couple hundred years from now although it really just happened last week. I’m still not quite sure what I do to deserve it. I hope it will be worth it.
I listen to the little things she says and wonder if she’s giving me more spoilers than she thinks she is. Or does she just want me to think that? Or does she think I’d think that she thinks she’s giving me more spoilers, so she thinks I will think about things I shouldn’t?
Like the cot. She recognized it. MY cot. How would she know my cot? I mean, sure, it was old. And it had Gallifreyan writing. But that didn’t automatically make it mine. I couldn’t ask at the time, there was quite enough to be going on with. Was it just a guess? Or has she seen it before? Could she possibly remember it from when she was a baby? Surely we don’t… could we? If we did… what would it be? More Time Lord than her and less than me?
That does tie into how she seems to keep suggesting we’re married. Does she really think I’d want to be stuck with a maddening woman who won’t even let a man wear hats? I mean, sure her hair is just magical and her eyes are like crystal stars, and that kiss… oh, I wouldn’t mind more of those. And that smile! Every move she makes, every look she gives me, just make my hearts feel all fluttery-tingly and funnily light.
Well, maybe... just maybe… I wouldn’t mind so much being stuck with her.