Deep Cover (Part 2), Don/Charlie/Ian, Numb3rs

[penguingal]

Title: Deep Cover (Part 2)
Authors: penguingal and schnaucl
Rating: NC17
Pairing: Don/Charlie/Ian
Warnings: Unabashed incest
Disclaimer: Oh God, no. Not ours.
Feedback: Like porn? Tell us about it!
A/n: Part of our Fantasy of Every Red-Blooded American Male series. What happens when Ian goes on deep assignment and loses his memory. Posted in two parts for length.

The debriefing lasted several hours, during which Don paced and Charlie watched him pace outside the closed conference room. When Ian finally emerged, he wanted to wrap him protectively in his arms and take him home to bed. He looked tired, like he'd been raked over the coals. Thankfully, Charlie stepped in and wrapped his arm around Ian's waist since Don couldn't.

"What happened?"

"They grilled me pretty closely, had to make sure I hadn't conveniently forgotten letting the bad guy go or forgotten going to the other side. And they very helpfully reminded me that these guys hadn't only threatened to kill the families of FBI agents, they actually succeeded. So." Ian scrubbed a hand over his face.

"So maybe Don's theory is right," Charlie said. "Maybe you were trying to protect us, in case they found out who you were. Did they ever come close to finding you?"

"There were a couple close calls," Ian said wearily. "When's the appointment with Bradford? Because if there's any chance he can get me to stop feeling like this, I really want to get him to do it."

"In about half an hour. Do you want to go up to his office to wait? Sometimes he's done with a client early," Don said, squeezing Ian's shoulder in sympathy.

"Yeah, that sounds good."

....

Charlie and Ian took a spot on Bradford's couch in the waiting room while Don sat in the chair trying to look like he wasn't fidgeting or nervous. About 15 minutes before their appointment, Bradford walked another agent out and saw them sitting there. "So, this is the famous Ian Edgerton," Bradford said, extending his hand.

"That's what they tell me," Ian said, shaking Bradford's hand.

"And I see you brought friends."

"They've been very helpful in trying to guide me through this. I thought Charlie should be here at least, seeing as he's supposed to know me best," Ian said.

"And I'm just here for moral support," Don said.

Bradford nodded. The rumors about Charlie and Ian had managed to reach even him. "I'd like to talk with Ian alone first, but if we need you, I'll bring you in," Bradford said. He stood aside and motioned Ian into his office.

Ian looked around the office curiously. This was the man who had apparently done wonders for Don. He tried to let that reassure him. He was going to have to walk a careful line between being honest and keeping his relationship with Don a secret.

"I understand you're coming back from an extended and stressful assignment."

"Yes. And now I don't remember Don or Charlie or anything connected with them. Don seems to think it may have been a kind of protective mechanism."

"Give a guy a little therapy and suddenly he thinks he's a psychiatrist," Bradford joked, trying to put Ian at ease. "So what does Doctor Don Eppes hypothesize is the reason for the protective mechanism?"

"The survivalists I was hunting had a penchant for killing the families of FBI agents that went after them. If I had been captured and they found out about Charlie, he might have been hurt or killed. Since Don is Charlie's family and Don's team is like his family, it's possible I convinced myself they didn't exist so I could keep them safe. But now that they're safe, I can't seem to be able to unconvince myself. And I want to. I really do."

"Tell me what Don and Charlie have told you about your life with Charlie," Bradford said.

Ian shifted in his seat. He told Bradford what Don had told him about saving Charlie's life. He told him about the apartment and how Charlie sometimes worked there when he was away. He told him about Charlie being in love with him and promising to stay with him even if he didn't get his memories back. He very much wanted to tell Bradford about Don knowing the way he took his coffee and where he kept his gym clothes and how loved it had made him feel, but he didn't. He kept the focus on Charlie as much as he could. "And it all sounds great, doc. It's a life I didn't know I wanted until they told me about it--a life I never thought I'd get to have."

"That might be worth talking about, too, after we get your memories back. Do you think Don's theory is right? That you forgot Charlie and the people he's connected to in order to keep him safe?"

"I think it's the only thing that makes sense right now. There's been no trauma or injury that anyone can find. Maybe it's something I've always done anyway, turned on the sniper when I've needed it and turned everything else off. But this time it went deeper than that, and now I can't turn Charlie's Ian back on."

Bradford frowned. "How is 'Charlie's Ian' different from who you are now?"

"Charlie's Ian is... warm. He sounds like he's kind and attentive and loving. Don even said he can be saccharine." Ian chuckled at the thought. "I'm not that way. I can't be, not when I'm hunting. Otherwise, I don't think I could ever make a kill when I needed to. And intellectually, I know we're the same guy, that I am the one who's that way with Charlie. But I don't remember it. I know I'm capable of it. Just having Charlie stay with me last night proved it."

"This may sound intrusive, and it is, but I need to get a full understanding of what's going on. Were you physically intimate with Charlie last night? I don't need the details," Bradford assured him.

"We slept in the same bed, but that was all." He hesitated, then in the interest of being honest, he continued. "I wanted to. When I first saw him after he and Don found me in the woods. He had to tell me who he was, who they were. What they were to me. Even then I didn't get it, at first. I thought the whole thing was just physical. Charlie's a good looking guy."

Bradford made a few notes. "Who decided you shouldn't have sex last night, you or Charlie?"

"I did. Charlie reacted negatively when I--propositioned him. I don't blame him. I must seem like a stranger. That's when I understood that my relationship with Charlie is different."

"Do you have any trouble remembering relationships you've had in the past, before Charlie?"

Ian shook his head. "No. I can remember all the lovers I've had, not that there were many. But I never had what I have with Charlie with any of them."

"Because you hadn't found anyone you were interested in or because you were trying to protect others?"

Ian shrugged. "A little of both. Also it was not finding anyone who was willing to sign up for a life with a man who often has to kill people for a living, even if I am doing it on the side of the good guys. It doesn't seem to bother Charlie, though."

"Does it bother you?"

"Not at all. I was born to do this," Ian said.

Bradford nodded and made a few more notes. "I think I have an idea of what's going on here. How about we bring Charlie in? I'd like to try something a little different to try to get your memories back."

"Can Don come in, too? They're both a part of this."

"I think we should probably check with Charlie. This is likely to get pretty personal."

Ian nodded and Bradford stepped out.

"How is he Doctor Bradford?" Charlie asked, standing immediately.

"He's okay, but he has repressed anything to do with you and your relationship together. He's created a mental block that allows him to believe your relationship doesn't exist so that if he had been captured he wouldn't put you in danger. I get the sense that this is something that Ian has never had to handle before. He's never let himself get close enough to someone to potentially put him or her in harm's way. Now, he can't get past that block." Bradford rubbed his lips. "I'd like to try hypnotizing him, seeing if we can get his brain to let him go back to the time when he was with you without worrying that it'll put you in danger."

"And if it can't?" Charlie asked quietly.

"Then we'll try something else. Ian's asked that you be there for the session. Don, too. I told him I thought you should have a say, Charlie. There might be things that come up that you don't want your brother to hear."

"No, it's okay. I want him there, too," Charlie said, before Don could worry about being left out. And if something did come out that wasn't supposed to, well, better Don was there and knew about it as it happened.

"Okay... let's go then," Bradford said, opening the door.

Ian stood when Charlie walked in and they immediately linked hands.

"It's going to be okay," Charlie murmured, squeezing his hand.

Bradford motioned for them all to sit. "Ian, have you ever been hypnotized?"

"No. Why?"

"I'd like to try it to see if we can get you past this block you've created. If our conscious mind is trying to protect us from something, sometimes the only way to get at it is to go to the subconscious directly." He studied Ian's face. "You ready to give it a shot?"

"If you really think it'll help," Ian said. "I've never put much stock in hypnosis."

"I think it might."

"And if it doesn't?" Ian asked.

Bradford smiled. "Then we'll try something else. Now try and relax and focus on my voice."

Charlie held Ian's hand while Bradford slowly took him down into a relaxed state. He had never seen his face so calm and free of care, and it made him want to reach out and stroke his cheek. But he didn't.

"Okay, Ian," Bradford said in the same calm voice he had used. "I want you to think back to before you were in the woods. Tell me where you are."

"I'm in my truck. I'm driving."

"Where are you going?"

Ian frowned. "I don't know."

"How do you feel?"

"Relaxed. Job is done. Don't have another job to go to yet."

Bradford nodded. "So where are you going?"

"Home. Home to Charlie. Charlie and his family. We're going to celebrate. It's been a long time since we've seen each other. Too long. Always too long."

"What happens the first time you see Charlie?"

Ian smiled. "I smile at him. He looks gorgeous. Curls all around his face. Can't wait to kiss him. Feel them under my hands."

"Good," Bradford said. "Where are you?"

"My apartment. He rushes to me. Kisses me. Calls me Tiger."

Charlie squeezed Ian's hand, refusing to blush under Bradford's even gaze.

"Then what?"

"Don comes over. I'm happy to see him. We eat. Charlie cooks. Later, Charlie and I make love."

Don held his breath. It wasn't a lie. Ian and Charlie had in fact made love first while he watched from the hook in the ceiling, but he didn't know if in this state Ian was compelled to be truthful, too.

Bradford glanced at Don but didn't comment. "And then?"

"More sex until we're exhausted. Then sleep. The next morning a run with Don while Charlie sleeps. The longer course, lots of people. Coffee, teasing Don about bacon though I have the turkey stuff, which I make."

"I see. And then what?"

"Hanging out with Charlie and Don. Relaxing. Dinner with Alan. Cozy. Warm." Ian took a deep breath and let it out, a content smile on his face.

"Good." Bradford made sure he was still deep down and then continued. "Now, where were you when you got the call for the job you just finished?"

Ian frowned again. "My car. No. My apartment. With Don and Charlie. Long assignment. They're worried."

"Are you worried?"

"No, not really. I'll miss them, but I don't think anything bad will happen. And Charlie and Don can spend some time alone together, or with their dad. They don't get as much time to hang out together when I'm there. It's not good for me to be gone so long, but it's not bad to be gone for a while, either."

"Okay, so you leave Don and Charlie and go out into the woods. What happens when you get out there?"

Ian shifted uncomfortably and involuntarily squeezed Charlie's hand. "Takes me a couple of days to find the survivalists. But once I do, they're easy to track. No sign of the leader though. Not yet. I overhear them talking."

"What are they talking about?"

"No. I don't... Charlie. I have to keep Charlie safe."

Bradford leaned forward. "Charlie's fine. He's safe. You kept him safe. What are the survivalists talking about?"

"They--they're talking about the way they killed a family. How they tortured them first. Made the mother watch while they killed the children. They're animals. I could kill them right now, but there're others around. I have to keep Charlie safe. I have to keep Don safe. I have to hide them away. I can't let them find out. Not even if they torture me."

"Ian, it's okay. Don and Charlie are safe, you kept them safe. They're right here with you."

"We're here," Charlie confirmed quietly.

"Right here," Don echoed.

"Safe," Ian repeated. He let out a breath and relaxed again. "They're safe."

Bradford touched Ian on the knee. "Ian, do you remember finishing the job?"

"Yes."

"And what about Don and Charlie?"

"They're safe," Ian said again. "I can go home now."

"Okay, Ian. I want you to listen to me very closely. I am going to tap you on the knee three times. When I get to three, you're going to wake up feeling refreshed and relaxed. You'll be in a room among friends, okay? One... two... three..."

Ian blinked and opened his eyes.

Charlie didn't even have to ask if he remembered who they were, he could see it in Ian's face.

Ian smiled broadly at Charlie before looking down to see their hands linked. "Charlie. God... it is so good to see you," he said, tugging Charlie into a fierce hug. "How did we get here?"

"What do you remember?" Bradford said.

Ian shook his head slowly. "I remember being out in the woods and finishing the job. But I got cut off from my truck and couldn't make it back right away. And now, here I am."

Bradford nodded. "I thought that might happen."

"And... who are you, exactly?"

"I'm William Bradford, one of the FBI's psychiatrists. Don and Charlie brought you in to see me because of some memory loss you were experiencing."

Don stepped forward and put a hand on Ian's shoulder, gratified to get a broad smile of recognition. "When you didn't come home, Charlie and I got worried. We found you out in the woods, but you didn't remember who we were or anything about us. It was like we had never met."

Ian shuddered. If he was that far gone they were all damn lucky he hadn't killed them. They probably knew that, too. "Did I suffer a head injury?"

"No. Your targets had tortured and killed family of FBI agents," Don said, his voice hard. And how the hell had the FBI kept that under wraps? "You were trying to protect us."

"How long have I been not myself?" Ian asked, his arm still tightly around Charlie's shoulder.

"Since we found you, just a day," Don said.

"A very long day," Charlie said. He turned to Bradford. "Can we take him home now? Please?"

Bradford nodded. "Yeah, you can go home. But, Ian, I'd like to see you back here in a couple days to make sure there aren't any other holes in your memory. And I think there are some things you might like to talk about."

Ian's brows knit together and he looked at Bradford skeptically. "I don't need a shrink."

"Maybe, maybe not. But I think everyone can use someone to talk to from time to time. At the very least, I want you back here for a follow-up before I sign off on putting you back on active duty. Now, get out of here."

"You know, Ian, Bradford is Don's shrink," Charlie said pointedly, once they were out of the office.

"I know that. I--oh. Look, I didn't mean--"

"Yes, you did," Don said evenly. "But we'll worry about that later. Let's just enjoy having you back right now."

Ian waited until they were at Don's SUV. He grabbed Don's wrist and squeezed. "I'm sorry."

Don gave him half a smile and pressed a hand to Ian's cheek. "I'm just glad you're home. I have missed you so much."

"I missed you, too. Both of you. I want to kiss you so badly, but if I start I might not stop."

Charlie squeezed Ian's shoulder. "Then let's go home."

"Tell me what happened while I was gone," Ian said.

Charlie and Don filled him in on their lives for the months he was gone. The cases they'd worked, together or separately, Charlie talked about his classes, students and work on Cognitive Emergence.

They were trying to kill time until they got home. Even from the backseat Charlie knew Don was exceeding the speed limit. Not dangerously so, but noticeably.

At last they were parked and inside Ian's apartment. As soon as the door was closed Ian reached for them both, trying to hold and kiss and caress them both all at the same time.

Charlie tugged on Ian's shirt. "This time, the exam will definitely include you being naked."

"What?" Ian asked.

"Explain later," Don growled.

Ian grabbed Don around the waist and propelled him into the bedroom, hauling Charlie along by the wrist. He laid them both out on the mattress and stood back. "God, you two are such a sight for sore eyes. I could just look at you forever."

Don pulled Charlie to him, running his hands into his curls and nibbling on his neck. "I sure as hell hope you plan to do more thank look."

"Oh, I intend to," Ian said.

Charlie gave a soft moan as Don nibbled on a particularly sensitive spot.

"Then get over here so we can get you naked," Charlie gasped, rubbing shamelessly against Don.

Ian growled in the back of his throat and launched at the bed, wrapping himself tightly against Charlie's back. He turned his head to him so he could claim his lips in a long, deep kiss. "Fuck, you feel so good," he murmured as he kissed his way along Charlie's jaw, nibbling and tasting. "Warm and alive. Both of you."

"We're right here, partner," Don said. "We're not going anywhere." He tugged on Ian's shirt, pulling it up his torso until Ian broke off long enough to let him strip it and toss it aside.

"I've missed you," Charlie said. He kissed Ian's neck and chest, then shifted a little so Don could have access to Ian. Charlie busied himself stripping Don and felt hands on the fly of his jeans.

"Missed you, too, baby. God, I missed you both so much," Ian said as he worked on Charlie's jeans, pushing them down his hips as soon as they were open. Turning his head a little he captured Don's mouth in a fierce and frantic kiss.

"Easy, partner, easy," Don soothed. "We don't have to rush."

Ian took a deep breath and tried to calm down. "I need you," he said urgently.

"You have us. I promise," Don said.

Together, Don and Charlie finished stripping Ian, making sure their clothes disappeared at the same time. Naked together at last, Ian wrapped a hand around Charlie's cock and stroked as he devoured his lips once more.

Charlie moaned and pushed into Ian's hand. He knew Don was right, knew they didn't have to hurry but he felt Ian's same urgency. Like if they didn't have sex right now it would all fade away and Ian would be gone or not remember them again.

"I need--I want Charlie in the middle," Ian murmured. "Want to feel you both under me. Please?" he said, still stroking Charlie steadily.

"Anything you want," Don said, kissing Ian deeply. He reached over for the lubricant and put it in Ian's easy reach. He kissed Charlie's neck and shoulder, ready to offer himself up to Charlie when he was ready.

Charlie kissed Don hungrily, fingers caressing his chest and sides, then lower down until he reached Don's cock and stroked firmly.

"Charlie," Don moaned.

Ian pressed a kiss to the small of Charlie's back and slicked his fingers.

"Who do you want to prep you, Don? Me or Ian?" Charlie asked, nibbling on his neck.

"Ian," Don said, arching his neck to give Charlie more access. He understood it was hard for Ian to choose, and that there was in fact only one of him. He knew Ian would be with him soon enough. "Want to feel him."

Ian leaned over Charlie and claimed Don's lips hard, a promise for later. "Roll over for me, partner."

Don obliged and Ian slid one finger in followed swiftly by a second.

Charlie alternated between kissing Don, kissing Ian, and just watching.

Don responded to whatever stimulus was presented to him, the feel of Ian's fingers moving in him, the touch of Charlie's lips and hands on his fevered skin. All he could do was make small, inarticulate sounds of pleasure as finally Ian dipped a third finger inside, stroking against his prostate.

"All ready for you, baby," Ian purred, kissing Charlie deeply.

Charlie smiled and turned Don's face up for a long kiss. Then he lined himself up and slowly pushed inside.

"Fuck, Charlie," Don moaned, pushing back eagerly into him. He hadn't quite realized how much he needed this until now, all the last tension of Ian being missing and then not being himself finally fading away. "God, yes."

"Your turn," Ian purred in Charlie's ear, preparing him as swiftly as he had Don and then plunging deep inside him.

Charlie moaned as Ian drove him deeper into Don. "Ian. Yes, just like that."

"Ian... Charlie...," Don moaned, twining his fingers with Charlie's. "God, please."

Ian wrapped his hands around Charlie's hips, forcing him into his rhythm as he worked hard and frantic into them both. "Fuck. You both... god you both feel so good. You're amazing. Missed you so much."

"Ian," Charlie whispered, letting him take control, drive them both. He kissed Don's back, squeezed Don's fingers. Already his pleasure was reaching the apex. It'd been too long.

Ian nibbled the back of Charlie's neck. "Stroke Don for me, baby," he commanded. "Want to feel you two come apart under me."

Don moaned as Charlie wrapped a hand around him, stroking in time with Ian's increasingly frantic thrusts.

"Ian... yes, Ian. Please," Charlie panted. "Please."

"Come for me, baby."

Charlie couldn't have disobeyed Ian's command even if he'd wanted to.

Don moaned as Charlie came, warmth spreading deep inside him. The sensation was the last trigger he needed, coming over Charlie's fingers with a strangled shout.

Ian came last of all, covering Don and Charlie's joined hand with his own.

Don panted at the bottom of the pile as they all started to come down from their orgasms. He closed his eyes, the wall of emotion--fear and gratitude and love and more--hitting him hardest now that all of his defenses were down. Charlie must have felt him take a shaky breath because he was suddenly whispering soothing words in his ear and shifting to the side so Ian could wrap his arms around him and stroke his skin.

"So scared," Don murmured, his face buried in Ian's neck. "When we couldn't find you, I was so scared you were gone. And then when you didn't remember us... it was so much worse. To have your body here and not the rest of you. I... I just..."

"Shh, partner. It's okay. It's okay now," Ian soothed.

"No, it's not," Don said. "How can we be sure it won't happen again?"

"We can't. But you know that. It's part of the job," Ian said. "All we can do is keep each other close and tight and love each other every day." He kissed Don deeply. "I'd never leave you if I could help it."

"I know. But I was talking about the memory loss."

"So was I," Ian said. "You know I'd do whatever I had to do to keep you safe, even if that meant risking not remembering you at all."

"What if the price is too high? What if Bradford can't bring you back next time?"

Ian drew Don tighter to him and reached out for Charlie, knowing Don was saying the things that Charlie was too full of emotion to express. "I don't know, partner. When you first found me without my memories, did I trust you?"

"Yes," Don said. "You did. Much faster than I thought you would. You believed everything we told you."

"Then, even as far as I had repressed my memories, I still knew you on some level. Deep down." He paused. "If Bradford hadn't been able to get my memories back, what would you have done?"

"We'd have found a way to get through it. Together." It probably wouldn't be an issue again. But Don wasn't sure how many times he could go through that.

"I can't promise you this will never happen again," Ian said. "I hope it never does. I always want to be able to come home to you both at the end of a job, hold you and kiss you and make love to you. I want--I want to spend the rest of my life with both of you."

"So do I," Don said quietly. "I know you can't make any guarantees. I can't either."

Ian rolled onto his back, tugging Don on top of him so he straddled his hips. Then he pulled Charlie close to his side. "Don, Charlie... I have every intention of growing old with you. As long as I live, I will always love you. And I never want to let go of you again."

Taking a deep breath, Don leaned down and kissed Ian deeply and passionately, sealing Ian's pledge with a kiss before allowing Charlie to do the same. "I love you."

"I love you," Ian said firmly. "Charlie, you've been quiet."

"It seemed like something you two needed to work out."

"And you? What do you need, baby?" Ian said, stroking Charlie's curls.

"I just need to be with both of you."

"You have us, baby," Ian said.

Don nodded. "Promise."

"So... what did you mean when you said that this time the examination would include me getting naked?" Ian asked, running his hands up and down Don's thighs.

Don ducked his head and smiled, taking the opportunity to run his hands along Ian's chest. "Something you said when you weren't you. We were taking you to the doctor, getting you checked out. And you asked if getting checked out included the two of us getting you naked."

Laughing, Ian threw his head back. "Wow. That sounds like... like the way I used to be. Before I met Charlie."

Charlie rolled his eyes. "Right. Like if you'd been yourself you wouldn't have said exactly the same thing. I probably would have taken you up on it, too."

"I might have," Ian admitted. "Maybe not right after just being found in the woods after being missing for several days. But a naked examination with the two of you sounds just like a little slice of heaven to me."

Don's hands still stroked Ian's chest, pulling a soft moan from him now.

"Don..." Ian murmured.

Charlie laughed. "I think Don's saying he's ready for round two."

Reaching down between them, Don wrapped a hand around Ian's half-hard cock. He stroked languidly a few times, Ian's cock hardening in his grip. "I think Ian just might be ready for the next round as well."

"Three months away... it's a long time to wait for you."

"Damn right," Don said. "They better give you a long time off this time."

"Well, until Dr. Bradford signs off on my eval, I can't do anything anyway. But they're talking about a month off, at least."

"It should be at least a month. And can we make a deal never to mention my therapist in the middle of sex ever again?" Don squeezed Ian's cock pointedly, making Ian groan.

"Technically, this is still foreplay, but you have a deal, partner," Ian said.

"Oh, really? Does this feel like foreplay?" Don asked, sliding down Ian's body and sucking the head of his cock into his mouth.

"Fuck!" Ian groaned and one hand made its way down to cup the back of Don's head, holding him in place and urging him on.

He reached out blindly with the other hand, searching for Charlie's skin and drawing him close when he found his hand.

Charlie claimed Ian's lips in a soft kiss but didn't interfere.

"Okay?" Ian managed, concerned about Charlie's quiet in the last few minutes.

"Relax. I'm just enjoying the show."

"Good... your brother does put on one hell of a show--oh, god," Ian moaned, arching up into Don's mouth as his teeth gently grazed his flesh.

Charlie grinned. "He'll tell you if you can still talk he's doing it wrong."

Ian only panted in reply, squeezing Charlie's hand. His other hand stroked over Don's hair restlessly, the soft strands against his palm just adding to the pleasurable sensations.

"Don--" he panted. "God... want to fuck you. Please."

Don pulled off and shifted to kiss Ian. "Then fuck me," he whispered.

Ian groaned and shifted, rolling Don onto his back so he could hover over him. He dropped his hand between Don's legs, finding him still stretched and mostly slick from his encounter with Charlie. Still, he took his time to stretch him again just because he could, using just a little more lube, before plunging deep inside Don's welcoming body.

Don groaned in pleasure, reaching for Ian's hand and linking it with his.

"Love you," Ian said, two fingers on the side of Don's jaw coaxing his eyes up to his face. "So much."

"Love you, too--oh God... Ian..." Don moaned. He reached out blindly for Charlie, dragging him close and making a frustrated noise when he didn't find his lips on the first try. When he finally did, he kissed him long and deep, transmitting the pleasure he was receiving to Charlie in the best way he could.

Charlie continued to kiss Don, enjoying making out with him and hearing the sounds of pleasure Ian was producing.

Ian steadily upped his pace until he was pushing hard, fast, and frantic into Don, one hand braced against the headboard so he didn't inadvertently slam Don's head against it. He felt his climax building at the base of his spine far sooner than he really wanted it to, but what could he expect after so many months away. Don was making soft whimpering noises below him, hard again and needy for release.

Resolutely, without laying a hand on Don, he let go of his control, coming deep inside him with a cry. Don whimpered in protest as he slipped from his body.

"Ian, please--oh!" Don moaned, breaking off and Ian took his cock deep in his mouth, sucking expertly. Don couldn't last long against that. He came with Ian's name on his lips and Charlie's hot mouth on his chest, sucking a particularly sensitive spot.

"God, you two..." Charlie said, pressing a kiss to Ian's wet mouth and tasting Don. "You two are just so hot together. You drive me absolutely crazy."

"Back at you," Ian said, running his thumb over Charlie's lips.

It was then that Don became aware of the pressure of Charlie's hard cock pressing against his thigh. He had a moment of absurd pleasure, as he always did, to know that he had a part of making that happen.

"Think Charlie needs a hand with something, partner," Don murmured, voice husky.

"A hand, a mouth, anything,' Charlie agreed, voice filled with need.

Ian pushed at Charlie's hip so he rolled onto his back, effortlessly offering himself for whatever Ian wanted to give him. Legs still half-tangled with Don, he kissed his way up Charlie's thigh until he finally pulled his cock between his soft lips.

Shifting so he could watch, Don threaded his hand into Charlie's hair, stroking in the places he knew would send pleasure spiraling through him, and occasionally dropping a soft kiss to a sensitive place on Charlie's skin.

It didn't take long before even Charlie was spent. He had a hand on Don's thigh and one on the back of Ian's neck. "That's it. I'm never moving again."

Ian chuckled, kissing Charlie softly. "I imagine you'll feel different when it comes time for breakfast tomorrow morning."

"No," Charlie protested. "You've killed me. I'm just going to lie here and be dead."

"But that would be sad," Don said. "You wouldn't want us to be sad, would you, Chuck?"

Charlie huffed, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. "Fine. Not dead then. But I am so not moving until someone makes me coffee tomorrow. Okay?"

"Deal," Don said, kissing his lips. He stroked his hand down Ian's arm. "I love you so much."

"I love you, too. Both of you. And even when I wasn't myself--some part of me must have known that."

Don stroked his hand down Ian's back. "You did. I know you did."

Charlie nodded, his eyes starting to droop with satiation and exhaustion. "I vote for sleeping now and making up for the rest of Ian's time away in the morning."

"And every day for the next month," Don agreed.

Ian chuckled and kissed Don one more time as he slid to Charlie's other side, holding him firmly in the middle. "You have that kind of time, Don? You're likely to be late for work every day for the next month if you make that promise."

"For you and Charlie, I'll make the time."

"Aw," Charlie said, turning to give Don a kiss. He felt entirely relaxed for the first time in months, ready to sleep between the two men he loved.

Don kissed him back in return, stroking his skin as he closed his eyes and drifted off into easy sleep. He and Ian soon followed suit and the next thing he knew it was morning and the sun was bathing the bedroom in a soft yellow light.

The next morning Ian was as good as his word and Don was 20 minutes late getting into the office. Don did his best to keep the stupid grin off his face.

He called Ian around 10:30, knowing Charlie should be teaching a class by now. "Hey. Why don't you meet me for lunch?"

"Sure. Where do you want to meet? The apartment? Though you might not actually eat if we do that," Ian said, smiling into the phone.

"How about Gonzales?" Don said. "I'll treat you to a burger."

Ian didn't ask about Charlie, figuring if Don wanted him there he'd have said so. As good as it was to have the three of them together, they all understood that spending time one-on-one was important, too. "Okay. Noonish?"

"Noonish is good."

"See you then," Ian said.

The bar had a small lunch crowd when Ian arrived. He saw Don almost immediately, sitting by himself in a corner booth.

"Hey," Ian said, sliding in across from him.

"Hey yourself." Don offered him a smile and a menu, although by now they were both so familiar with the place they didn't need it. They made a little small talk and after the waitress took their order Don leaned forward and Ian braced himself.

"I wanted to talk to you about what Bradford said. And what you said."

"Don, I already said I'm sorry. And I am."

"I know, but that's not what I meant. After the Holye shooting I thought seeing Bradford was a waste of time, too. Instead of just getting through it I went in pissed off and blew him off. I walked out of the session. He made the point that I could have just gotten through it, and he'd been prepared to do a pro forma review. But since I acted the way I had, maybe there were issues that needed to be addressed, and he was right. I do have issues, even entire subscriptions. But I don't think anyone would say it hasn't helped me. And I don't think anyone would say it makes me a liability in the field."

"Don, I appreciate what you're trying to do. But I really don't think I'm going to get anything out of sitting down and talking to Bradford. I don't have a problem with what I do. It's what I was always meant to do."

Don pressed his foot to the inside of Ian's under the table, the best he could do in lieu of holding his hand. "Are you sure? When you didn't have your memories, Charlie told you he loved you and you seemed... surprised. Like you couldn't quite believe someone like Charlie was capable of loving someone like you."

"I was probably just surprised a civilian didn't run away or seem to worship it." He'd known people like that, too. People who had never killed who wanted to be close to someone who had. They bothered him a lot more than the people who were simply turned off. "And as I recall, Charlie took some convincing."

"Charlie had to get to know you and not your job first, but it wasn't long before he fell for you, that much I know," Don said. "Look, I get it. I know the idea of therapy is not the most appealing. Guys like us, we don't open up easily. All I'm saying is that there might be some things it could be helpful to talk about that you aren't even aware of. Maybe deep down you don't think that you deserve to have this kind of life. I saw the--the longing on your face when you didn't know who we were. You definitely wanted to believe that this was your life, but you couldn't quite do it."

"Don't--" Ian began, but stopped and took a breath. Don wasn't the enemy. Even if he felt like it right now. And maybe that was Don's point.

"Ian... just think about it. Bradford's a good guy. He was on the job. He knows what it's like out there. I trust him." He pressed his foot against Ian's again. "Please just think about it?"

The food arrived and they lapsed into silence for a long moment. "Is there any particular reason you didn't want Charlie here for this?"

Don sifted through various answers to that question before speaking. "I don't really like to talk about my therapy with Charlie."

"Why not?" Ian asked, taking a bite of his burger.

Don squirmed a little. "I'm not ready yet. It's... too personal. Too raw still. I love Charlie, I do. But I'm still pretty screwed up when it comes to him."

"Does Bradford know?"

"About Charlie? God, no."

"I thought it was important to be honest in therapy."

Don shot him a dirty look. "It's more important that everyone keeps their jobs and clearance."

Ian lifted his hands. "Okay, okay. So... you really think it's a good idea I go talk to him?"

"Yeah, I do. At the very least, you've been through something traumatic. It might help to talk about it."

"Okay. I'll do one session and see what happens."

"Good." Don settled in to enjoy his burger.

"Things are okay with you and Charlie, right?"

"Yeah, as they ever are. I just meant--you know, any siblings have issues from growing up together, and when it's somebody like Charlie..."

Ian glanced around and then reached out quickly to squeeze Don's hand. "I get it."

"There's just some things I never dealt with. Now, more than ever, it's important that I do."

"Do you think it would help Charlie? If you've got unresolved issues, I'm sure he does, too."

"Maybe. But I think that's something he has to decide for himself."

"Yeah, you're probably right," Ian said. They quietly changed the topic, moving on to talk about other things until Don's phone rang.

"Eppes. Yeah. Alright, yeah... I'll be there soon. Okay." He hung up the phone and looked at Ian.

"You have to go."

"Yeah. But it doesn't sound too bad. See you tonight?" Don said as he abandoned the last of his lunch and slid out of the booth.

"You know where I'll be," Ian said, giving Don a smile. Don squeezed his shoulder and then hurried out.

Ian waited until he got home, then as promised, he put in a call to William Bradford.

They talked briefly and Ian made an appointment for the next afternoon. As he hung up the phone, he had to admit to a sense of relief. Thinking for a moment, he picked the phone up again and dialed Charlie, knowing he should be having office hours. "Hey, baby," he purred into the phone when Charlie answered.

"Ian, hi! It's good to hear your voice," he said, smiling. "What's up?"

"Was just thinking about you, wondering if you can knock off early. Don's coming over tonight and I wanted to spend some time with you first," Ian said. "I saw him at lunch."

"Sure, it's been pretty slow. Your apartment?"

"Yeah."

"See you in a few."

Ian hung up the phone and straightened up the apartment, lighting a few candles, even though the sun was still bright in the sky. He hadn't really had a chance to take care of Charlie and he really wanted to. Also, he wanted to tell him that he'd chosen to try therapy, at least once. Charlie's key turned in the lock right on schedule. "Hi baby," he said, wrapping his arms around his waist and kissing him.

“Mmm. Hi there. This is certainly a nice way to be welcomed home."

"We didn't really have a chance to connect, just the two of us, with all the craziness. And I thought we should. Plus, I have something I want to tell you," Ian said, pulling Charlie over to the couch.

"Oh? What's that?" Charlie tried to swallow against the ball of nervousness in his throat, certain that Ian was going to tell him that he didn't really remember them, that he'd been faking his recovery.

"Don and I had a talk over lunch. He convinced me... he convinced me that I should try talking to Dr. Bradford, see how therapy goes."

"Oh," he said, relieved. "Okay. That's probably a good idea. Don certainly seems to have benefited from it."

"Yeah, it seems like he has. I promised Don I'd try it out at least once. But I talked to Dr. Bradford earlier and it made me feel--relieved. I think it'll go well." Ian pulled him close and kissed him. "Now, enough about therapy. Let me take care of you."

"Well, if you insist," Charlie said, grinning.

"I do indeed," Ian said. He took Charlie back into the bedroom, laying him out on the mattress. He made love to him slowly, watching him fall apart a bit at a time before allowing himself to fall over the edge. They napped until Don came in and pulled him into bed as well.

"Well," Don panted as they lay on the bed, catching their breath. "That was fun."

"Food?" Ian asked.

Charlie rolled over. "Depends. You gonna cook?"

"Sure. I bet there's something around here I can whip up."

Don grinned. "Deal. I'll help, let Chuck sleep." He pushed himself out of bed, feeling Charlie's eyes on his ass. It was perfect. And normal. And everything he wanted. He tossed Charlie a wink over his shoulder. "Be back soon."