(no subject)
I think I'm about due for another round of STORY TIME, you guys. Gather 'round.
So, Emily and I decided to meet up for lunch at Pho Time because I'm totally gay for those eggrolls and I could practically live off of them. We were texting in the car because lol I'm such a rebel, and she was waiting for me. I was like, I'M ALMOST THERE 8D and then my phone started vibrating a bunch in my lap. I answered it because I saw Emerypants for a second on my phone (turns out she sent a text saying "KK~" at the same time I got the phone call), and this is the brief conversation, word-for-word:
???: Hey there!
ME: I'm coming to fuck you in the butt.
???: What...?
ME: I'm coming to fuck you in the butt!
???: ... Oh, are you?
And then the look of abject horror on my face as I pull up next to Emily and see that she doesn't even have a phone in her hand. So I glance down at my caller ID, read Mommy and promptly hang up. Emily can even vouch for the look on my face, something akin to D8, and when I got out of the car, the first thing I said was: "I JUST TOLD MY MOM THAT I WAS COMING TO FUCK HER IN THE BUTT."
Like.
Fffffff, and then the entire meal was spent with us choking on our food as we keep giggling, and I was like, "IF I DON'T SEE YOU AFTER WORK TONIGHT IT'S BECAUSE I WENT HOME AND MY MOTHER KILLED ME FOR SAYING THAT TO HER."
Clearly, this is only something I, of all people, am capable of saying to someone.
THE END RESULT: I AM STILL ALIVE, OBVIOUSLY. I came home and we totally carried on a 20 minute conversation that didn't even touch this topic with a thirty foot pole.
So, Emily and I decided to meet up for lunch at Pho Time because I'm totally gay for those eggrolls and I could practically live off of them. We were texting in the car because lol I'm such a rebel, and she was waiting for me. I was like, I'M ALMOST THERE 8D and then my phone started vibrating a bunch in my lap. I answered it because I saw Emerypants for a second on my phone (turns out she sent a text saying "KK~" at the same time I got the phone call), and this is the brief conversation, word-for-word:
???: Hey there!
ME: I'm coming to fuck you in the butt.
???: What...?
ME: I'm coming to fuck you in the butt!
???: ... Oh, are you?
And then the look of abject horror on my face as I pull up next to Emily and see that she doesn't even have a phone in her hand. So I glance down at my caller ID, read Mommy and promptly hang up. Emily can even vouch for the look on my face, something akin to D8, and when I got out of the car, the first thing I said was: "I JUST TOLD MY MOM THAT I WAS COMING TO FUCK HER IN THE BUTT."
Like.
Fffffff, and then the entire meal was spent with us choking on our food as we keep giggling, and I was like, "IF I DON'T SEE YOU AFTER WORK TONIGHT IT'S BECAUSE I WENT HOME AND MY MOTHER KILLED ME FOR SAYING THAT TO HER."
Clearly, this is only something I, of all people, am capable of saying to someone.
THE END RESULT: I AM STILL ALIVE, OBVIOUSLY. I came home and we totally carried on a 20 minute conversation that didn't even touch this topic with a thirty foot pole.