(no subject)
i decided i didn't like paying my phone bill...so i kinda stopped. and then sprint decided to turn it off. it's been shut down for like a week and it's killing me, and i can't turn it on until i make enough money. next week sometime, maybe? anyway the point is this: there are 4 people i NEED to call. i haven't talked to them in way too long and i feel like a complete idiot for it. yasmin, sahar, steve-o, drew, despite what you may think, i love you all and i'm sorry i've been a shitty friend. i miss you guys so much and i promise i'm going to call all of you as soon as i can.
also, i was thinking about my life. and i was thinking that anyone that went to college after high school and graduated with me is probably going to be done with school in the next year or two. it kinda makes me feel like a failure, and i'm sick being a loser who has absolutely nothing to show for herself. i don't want to be that person who never has a real job and is always depending on other people to help her survive. namely my parents and my boyfriend. i mean it's sad, really. my parents pay for my health insurance and car insurance, and the pay for it when the car goes in. and my boyfriend pays for almost everything else and i completely appreciate the help, but i feel like an ass. i need to be able to count on myself and i can't. that sucks. but i believe i've found my calling (for the time being). flight attendant. but i can't start that until i'm 21. i would go back to school, but i think if i did that i might just be setting myself up to fail. i just think there's no way i would actually be able to finish. i have no drive, or passion for anything at the moment. blah.
also, i was thinking about my life. and i was thinking that anyone that went to college after high school and graduated with me is probably going to be done with school in the next year or two. it kinda makes me feel like a failure, and i'm sick being a loser who has absolutely nothing to show for herself. i don't want to be that person who never has a real job and is always depending on other people to help her survive. namely my parents and my boyfriend. i mean it's sad, really. my parents pay for my health insurance and car insurance, and the pay for it when the car goes in. and my boyfriend pays for almost everything else and i completely appreciate the help, but i feel like an ass. i need to be able to count on myself and i can't. that sucks. but i believe i've found my calling (for the time being). flight attendant. but i can't start that until i'm 21. i would go back to school, but i think if i did that i might just be setting myself up to fail. i just think there's no way i would actually be able to finish. i have no drive, or passion for anything at the moment. blah.