Response to previous post
I want to respond to everyone's comments at once in an entry because it makes it easier for me.
-First of all, I mentioned the idea of personal morals, and it was challenged. I think that I need to clarify this point. There are two types of morals in this world. The first is the generalized social norms that are a product of our society. These norms say that underage drinking is not good, smoking anything is not good, random hooking up is not good, etc. When I refer to morals, I'm not referring to this type of moral. I'm instead referring to the second type, which are personal morals. As people, we have the power to decide what we will do and what we won't do, and people draw the line at different points. For example, someone who is straight edge won't drink or do any drugs, but may or may not also randomly hook-up. Personally, I will drink and get drunk, but I won't smoke cigarettes or pot or do any other drugs. To me, drinking for social reason is not a bad thing, but that may not be the same for someone else. Ilana, for example, says that she will drink alcohol if it tastes good, but she won't get drunk. Those are her own personal morals, which are different than general social morals. Therefore, it's wrong to say that someone is "stronger" than someone else because they don't drink, because they also have morals that they are sticking to.
-Second of all, I want to clarify that I'm not calling anyone out in particular, so please don't interpret it that way. The examples I use from entries later on in this post are just entries that particularly jumped out at me. Don't feel like I'm patronizing you.
-I completely understand if people are concerned about alcohol, but I also believe that, ultimately, people are to blame for what they do even if they're drunk. I'm tired of seeing entries where the focus of the entry is how bad alcohol itself is. I agree that people decide to drink alcohol, so I also think that they should be held accountable for drinking alcohol. For example, I forgot who said it, but I remember seeing a comment that said something along the lines of "So and so and so and so did this when they were drunk, therefore, alcohol is a bad thing." It's not alcohol's fault that these people are in the situation...it's still their fault.
"But here, we've already had more than a dozen sexual assaults, some of them rapes, a shooting, and a drunk driving crash, all of these alcohol-related."
As bad as that is, again, it's not alcohol's fault, and I don't know if that was what this comment was saying, but I'd rather see people call out others than call out the institution of alcohol. I'd rather see an entry like Ilana's where she wonders why people are going to such desperate measures to drink than an entry like David's where he states that drinking alcohol is stupid (reference entry from 9/7)
-In an entry from 9/30, David said
"Why is it so hard to peopel to accept that some people simply don't want to drink. Yes, it's a huge social norm, and msot peope are fine with even a little, but if someone simply doesn't like it, why do so many peopel take issue with it?"
Maybe this is because of where I am from, but I'm still confused as to where this is coming from. I don't know of any person who honestly thinks that you need to drink in order to be friends with them. If they do, they don't deserve to be your friend. If these people who drink want to hang out with you and be your friends anyway, it shows that they really don't care whether you drink or not. For example, there is this one kid who keeps asking me why I don't smoke, and it annoys me sometimes, but this kid also likes to hang out with me even when neither of us are smoking, so I know he really doesn't care that much that I don't smoke.
For these reasons, I only drink with people who I am comfortable with, and I don't see too much harm in that. The focus is having a fun time with my friends, and not on the alcohol. Even if I go to a huge party, I always make sure to go with someone I trust, in case either of us makes the mistake of drinking too much. You shouldn't have to feel like an asshole if you tell someone they're having too much to drink, becuase hopefully you're close enough to that person where you can demonstrate that you really care about their well-being. This is a much better approach than driving home the message that drinking is a bad thing to someone who does drink.
-Finally, people make mistakes. Drinking alcohol is a form of responsibility, just like driving a car is. People make mistakes early on when driving, but it ultimately makes them better drivers. When people first drink, they will not know exactly what their limit is. For some, it takes longer to learn moderation, but it's still an important thing to learn. I still am learning myself, and that in itself is not such a bad thing. There's nothing wrong with not drinking, just like there is nothing wrong with not wanting to drive. There are ways around both. But drinking, just like driving, is a means of responsibility, and people will screw it up, but it will make them better and more responsible in the end.
-Pradamaster
-First of all, I mentioned the idea of personal morals, and it was challenged. I think that I need to clarify this point. There are two types of morals in this world. The first is the generalized social norms that are a product of our society. These norms say that underage drinking is not good, smoking anything is not good, random hooking up is not good, etc. When I refer to morals, I'm not referring to this type of moral. I'm instead referring to the second type, which are personal morals. As people, we have the power to decide what we will do and what we won't do, and people draw the line at different points. For example, someone who is straight edge won't drink or do any drugs, but may or may not also randomly hook-up. Personally, I will drink and get drunk, but I won't smoke cigarettes or pot or do any other drugs. To me, drinking for social reason is not a bad thing, but that may not be the same for someone else. Ilana, for example, says that she will drink alcohol if it tastes good, but she won't get drunk. Those are her own personal morals, which are different than general social morals. Therefore, it's wrong to say that someone is "stronger" than someone else because they don't drink, because they also have morals that they are sticking to.
-Second of all, I want to clarify that I'm not calling anyone out in particular, so please don't interpret it that way. The examples I use from entries later on in this post are just entries that particularly jumped out at me. Don't feel like I'm patronizing you.
-I completely understand if people are concerned about alcohol, but I also believe that, ultimately, people are to blame for what they do even if they're drunk. I'm tired of seeing entries where the focus of the entry is how bad alcohol itself is. I agree that people decide to drink alcohol, so I also think that they should be held accountable for drinking alcohol. For example, I forgot who said it, but I remember seeing a comment that said something along the lines of "So and so and so and so did this when they were drunk, therefore, alcohol is a bad thing." It's not alcohol's fault that these people are in the situation...it's still their fault.
"But here, we've already had more than a dozen sexual assaults, some of them rapes, a shooting, and a drunk driving crash, all of these alcohol-related."
As bad as that is, again, it's not alcohol's fault, and I don't know if that was what this comment was saying, but I'd rather see people call out others than call out the institution of alcohol. I'd rather see an entry like Ilana's where she wonders why people are going to such desperate measures to drink than an entry like David's where he states that drinking alcohol is stupid (reference entry from 9/7)
-In an entry from 9/30, David said
"Why is it so hard to peopel to accept that some people simply don't want to drink. Yes, it's a huge social norm, and msot peope are fine with even a little, but if someone simply doesn't like it, why do so many peopel take issue with it?"
Maybe this is because of where I am from, but I'm still confused as to where this is coming from. I don't know of any person who honestly thinks that you need to drink in order to be friends with them. If they do, they don't deserve to be your friend. If these people who drink want to hang out with you and be your friends anyway, it shows that they really don't care whether you drink or not. For example, there is this one kid who keeps asking me why I don't smoke, and it annoys me sometimes, but this kid also likes to hang out with me even when neither of us are smoking, so I know he really doesn't care that much that I don't smoke.
For these reasons, I only drink with people who I am comfortable with, and I don't see too much harm in that. The focus is having a fun time with my friends, and not on the alcohol. Even if I go to a huge party, I always make sure to go with someone I trust, in case either of us makes the mistake of drinking too much. You shouldn't have to feel like an asshole if you tell someone they're having too much to drink, becuase hopefully you're close enough to that person where you can demonstrate that you really care about their well-being. This is a much better approach than driving home the message that drinking is a bad thing to someone who does drink.
-Finally, people make mistakes. Drinking alcohol is a form of responsibility, just like driving a car is. People make mistakes early on when driving, but it ultimately makes them better drivers. When people first drink, they will not know exactly what their limit is. For some, it takes longer to learn moderation, but it's still an important thing to learn. I still am learning myself, and that in itself is not such a bad thing. There's nothing wrong with not drinking, just like there is nothing wrong with not wanting to drive. There are ways around both. But drinking, just like driving, is a means of responsibility, and people will screw it up, but it will make them better and more responsible in the end.
-Pradamaster