T~T
*insert image of miserable me here*
Okay, so life has been pretty okay lately. Except for the whole, I'm completely miserable with myself as of late. I got a new car, school is going okay. But I'm just having a hard time dealing with the fact that half of my friends have ditched me because I picked a side and I think it was the right decision to choose this side. I'm also having a hard time dealing with the fact that so many people lie right to my face. It's just so... Fucking annoying. I'm just getting really, REALLY sick of it. For me to be led on for so long... I feel both completely retarded and just plain abused. No, it's no one I know in real life. But still. It still hurts. Because you trust someone so much after knowing them for so long like this. And... And they go around and stab you in the back. I think it has something to do with loyalty. But... damnit, being loyal isn't always the right thing to do! I'm more depressed now. And I had my counseling appointment yesterday. I wish I would've found out about this sooner. God, I miss people that wouldn't lie to me and tell it straight up. I miss Jeremy. I miss Michael. I freaking hate Terri right now. But, there's not a damn thing I can do about it. I don't know. I think that I'm really lonely. I only have one really close friend and I can't even talk to her about everything because I know she wouldn't understand half of it. I... *headdesk* Can I just have some happiness now please? Just a little bit? That's all I want. That's all I've ever wanted. SOMEBODY FREAKING LOVE ME ALREADY THAT I CAN TOUCH. THAT AREN'T CONNECTED TO ME VIA A BUNCH OF FREAKING CORDS AND BINARY CODES.
Okay, so life has been pretty okay lately. Except for the whole, I'm completely miserable with myself as of late. I got a new car, school is going okay. But I'm just having a hard time dealing with the fact that half of my friends have ditched me because I picked a side and I think it was the right decision to choose this side. I'm also having a hard time dealing with the fact that so many people lie right to my face. It's just so... Fucking annoying. I'm just getting really, REALLY sick of it. For me to be led on for so long... I feel both completely retarded and just plain abused. No, it's no one I know in real life. But still. It still hurts. Because you trust someone so much after knowing them for so long like this. And... And they go around and stab you in the back. I think it has something to do with loyalty. But... damnit, being loyal isn't always the right thing to do! I'm more depressed now. And I had my counseling appointment yesterday. I wish I would've found out about this sooner. God, I miss people that wouldn't lie to me and tell it straight up. I miss Jeremy. I miss Michael. I freaking hate Terri right now. But, there's not a damn thing I can do about it. I don't know. I think that I'm really lonely. I only have one really close friend and I can't even talk to her about everything because I know she wouldn't understand half of it. I... *headdesk* Can I just have some happiness now please? Just a little bit? That's all I want. That's all I've ever wanted. SOMEBODY FREAKING LOVE ME ALREADY THAT I CAN TOUCH. THAT AREN'T CONNECTED TO ME VIA A BUNCH OF FREAKING CORDS AND BINARY CODES.