Did You Need Something? (WWE - Pure Sillyness. Matt Hardy, Jeffy Hardy, Edge)
In honour of this journal, I have to post the first fic I ever REALLY posted in public.
I wrote it many many moons ago and now it just cracks my shit up.
I figured since it was about a notebook, it was fitting.
TITLE: Did You Need Something?
RATING: R
WHY?: Mention of TEH GAY SECKS.
DISTRIBUTION: Sure, just let me know.
DISCLAIMER: I don’t own any of the wrestlers, I just like making them do dirty things.
SUMMARY: Matt Hardy catches one of the WWF’s physical therapists writing “fiction”
DID YOU NEED SOMETHING?
“Did you need something?” she asked putting down her pen and closing the notebook she had been writing in.
“Not much - just tape for my wrist - fuckin’ RVD doesn’t know how to land that Goddamn Frogsplash……..” complained Matt.
“Here you go,” said Liv, taping his wrist for him “All done.” She sat down on the couch against, picking up her pen and notebook.
“Thanks……..” he said. Then “What are you writing?” he asked curiously.
Liv raised an eyebrow. “Dirty Stories” she deadpanned.
“No really - “ Matt laughed “what are you writing?”
“I TOLD you. Dirty Stories. About all the lovely men in this company.”
It was Matt’s turn to raise an eyebrow. “Like who?”
Liv smirked “Like YOU Flyboy.”
“You lie!” laughed Matt. “Who’d you put me with? Lita??? Molly?”
“Ha!” said Liv “In MY world you’re Jimmy Rave’s BITCH.”
Matt backpedaled “What?!?”
“You heard me.”
“But I’m not…….”
“Uh huh. Tell it to someone who DOESN’T spy on you all in the showers.”
“WHAT?!?!”
“You heard me.”
“I don’t believe you……..”
Liv smirked again, opening her notebook “Then try this on for size…….just stop me if it sounds FAMILIAR.”
“He peered through the crack in the shower stall, stroking himself and watching as his brother leaned his head back against the tile, water pouring down on the blonde curls of the man who knelt before him…”Shit Adam…..I’m gonna….Aahhhhhhhhhhh!” Jeff’s back arched as he shot into Adam’s mouth……”
“Stop! Stop!” growled Matt trying to take the notebook away from her.
Liv climbed backwards, standing on the back of the couch…… “Are you SURE you want me to stop? The next part gets really………….STEAMY.” She held the notebook over her head. “Really……..just let me continue…..I guarantee YOU get satisfaction……………….”
“Give me that notebook!” howled Matt jumping onto the couch.
“No! It’s MINE! I wrote it!” squealed Liv trying to escape.
Matt stalked her across the therapy room, backing her into a corner. Liv kept the notebook behind her back. Matt leaned forward until he was nose to nose with her.
“Give. Me. The. Notebook.” He demanded.
“Or WHAT?” she asked.
“Or I’ll……….”
The door opened.
“Oh! Sorry man! Didn’t know you were BUSY!” stuttered Hugh Morrus.
“That’s okay Hugh - we were DONE. Weren’t we Matt?” smirked Livia.
“No really - It’s okay - just keep doin what yer doin! I’ll wait!” Hugh Backed out the door and ran down the hall.
“Oh MAN!” He thought to himself “I win the bet! I TOLD Christian that Matt wasn’t gay!”
FINI.
*falls on floor laughing at herself*
I wrote it many many moons ago and now it just cracks my shit up.
I figured since it was about a notebook, it was fitting.
TITLE: Did You Need Something?
RATING: R
WHY?: Mention of TEH GAY SECKS.
DISTRIBUTION: Sure, just let me know.
DISCLAIMER: I don’t own any of the wrestlers, I just like making them do dirty things.
SUMMARY: Matt Hardy catches one of the WWF’s physical therapists writing “fiction”
DID YOU NEED SOMETHING?
“Did you need something?” she asked putting down her pen and closing the notebook she had been writing in.
“Not much - just tape for my wrist - fuckin’ RVD doesn’t know how to land that Goddamn Frogsplash……..” complained Matt.
“Here you go,” said Liv, taping his wrist for him “All done.” She sat down on the couch against, picking up her pen and notebook.
“Thanks……..” he said. Then “What are you writing?” he asked curiously.
Liv raised an eyebrow. “Dirty Stories” she deadpanned.
“No really - “ Matt laughed “what are you writing?”
“I TOLD you. Dirty Stories. About all the lovely men in this company.”
It was Matt’s turn to raise an eyebrow. “Like who?”
Liv smirked “Like YOU Flyboy.”
“You lie!” laughed Matt. “Who’d you put me with? Lita??? Molly?”
“Ha!” said Liv “In MY world you’re Jimmy Rave’s BITCH.”
Matt backpedaled “What?!?”
“You heard me.”
“But I’m not…….”
“Uh huh. Tell it to someone who DOESN’T spy on you all in the showers.”
“WHAT?!?!”
“You heard me.”
“I don’t believe you……..”
Liv smirked again, opening her notebook “Then try this on for size…….just stop me if it sounds FAMILIAR.”
“He peered through the crack in the shower stall, stroking himself and watching as his brother leaned his head back against the tile, water pouring down on the blonde curls of the man who knelt before him…”Shit Adam…..I’m gonna….Aahhhhhhhhhhh!” Jeff’s back arched as he shot into Adam’s mouth……”
“Stop! Stop!” growled Matt trying to take the notebook away from her.
Liv climbed backwards, standing on the back of the couch…… “Are you SURE you want me to stop? The next part gets really………….STEAMY.” She held the notebook over her head. “Really……..just let me continue…..I guarantee YOU get satisfaction……………….”
“Give me that notebook!” howled Matt jumping onto the couch.
“No! It’s MINE! I wrote it!” squealed Liv trying to escape.
Matt stalked her across the therapy room, backing her into a corner. Liv kept the notebook behind her back. Matt leaned forward until he was nose to nose with her.
“Give. Me. The. Notebook.” He demanded.
“Or WHAT?” she asked.
“Or I’ll……….”
The door opened.
“Oh! Sorry man! Didn’t know you were BUSY!” stuttered Hugh Morrus.
“That’s okay Hugh - we were DONE. Weren’t we Matt?” smirked Livia.
“No really - It’s okay - just keep doin what yer doin! I’ll wait!” Hugh Backed out the door and ran down the hall.
“Oh MAN!” He thought to himself “I win the bet! I TOLD Christian that Matt wasn’t gay!”
FINI.
*falls on floor laughing at herself*