Serious face for serious thoughts.
Yes, everyone I live. How have you been? Life for me has been pretty darn good as of late, I've been running around to lots of events which I'll talk about soon...but this isn't a catch up/what's new thing. This is a sorely needed post to make things clear as to why I keep coming and going from the net like I do. There is no cut because if you know me, I don't want you to pass over this. If you don't, then just disregard it and move along.
So for those of you who know me, I'm sure you notice a pattern in the way I behave here and in other places I frequent. I'll be active, maybe persistently so for a while, and then, all of a sudden I'll stop or rarely show up. For the life of me, I CAN NOT explain the exact reason why I do this, but it's a strange reality. I suppose if you want to compare it to something, it would be a rather warped version of the porcupine syndrome.
For those who don't know: Porcupine Syndrome - The fear of getting close to someone or something because of a fear of hurting others. Much like a porcupine can’t get to close to other animals without hurting someone.
Now, I say warped because I'm not afraid of people getting to know me, or avoiding them cause they did something to upset me. Believe me, if they did, they would KNOW it. It's more akin to becoming a temporary hermit, I suppose. There are times where I just need go off and be on my own or I completely burn out. It's not isolated to the internet either, sometimes family will call me because I don't call them for a bit.
I'm sure this drives people up the wall, and I've tried to correct or adjust this behavior before, but I just couldn't make it stick. Hopefully this time I'll make some progress since jewelry school starts up again on Monday full time for me, and I'll have to manage my time and habits seriously for the next 6 months. No staying up late, goofing around, none of that due to only 5 absent days which will all be used on my dentist trips.
But I digress, the real point of all this is that for all my friends and acquaintances who want to call BS on me, yell at me, or what have you...please feel free. I'm kind of an ass, but I'm trying not to be. I apologize.
So for those of you who know me, I'm sure you notice a pattern in the way I behave here and in other places I frequent. I'll be active, maybe persistently so for a while, and then, all of a sudden I'll stop or rarely show up. For the life of me, I CAN NOT explain the exact reason why I do this, but it's a strange reality. I suppose if you want to compare it to something, it would be a rather warped version of the porcupine syndrome.
For those who don't know: Porcupine Syndrome - The fear of getting close to someone or something because of a fear of hurting others. Much like a porcupine can’t get to close to other animals without hurting someone.
Now, I say warped because I'm not afraid of people getting to know me, or avoiding them cause they did something to upset me. Believe me, if they did, they would KNOW it. It's more akin to becoming a temporary hermit, I suppose. There are times where I just need go off and be on my own or I completely burn out. It's not isolated to the internet either, sometimes family will call me because I don't call them for a bit.
I'm sure this drives people up the wall, and I've tried to correct or adjust this behavior before, but I just couldn't make it stick. Hopefully this time I'll make some progress since jewelry school starts up again on Monday full time for me, and I'll have to manage my time and habits seriously for the next 6 months. No staying up late, goofing around, none of that due to only 5 absent days which will all be used on my dentist trips.
But I digress, the real point of all this is that for all my friends and acquaintances who want to call BS on me, yell at me, or what have you...please feel free. I'm kind of an ass, but I'm trying not to be. I apologize.