(no subject)
have you ever felt a need so great that you just didn't know what to do? i have and am right now. i need to see him. right now i live to see him. to hear his voice. am i crazy? he doesn't even know my name. yesterday he talked to me but he didn't know my name. i was "a girl". i want to be more than a girl... i want to be his girl. :) but i am feeling a pit of despair. i feel hopeless because i haven't seen him yet today. i feel hope when i see him and he's looking at me. does he like me? what does he see when he looks at me? am i only imagining it? am i making something out of nothing? am i going crazy for nothing? am i falling inlove with someone who will never love me back? i wish i could feel more natural around him. i always get so stiff. today i will try to be more relaxed. i will try to joke with him and talk and SMILE! and meet his eyes. but then i'm afraid that my eyes will tell too much. that he will see the adoration in them and he'll back off. why... i wish it were easy.. i wish i wasn't afraid of rejection. l'OH come lo desidero