Stupid cupid
Happy Valentine's day, everyone. Sucks, don't it?
I never really had a Valentine before. (I won't count elementary school when everyone brought a paper bag and decorated it, and then dropped cards and candy into each one.) Well, okay, so I lied... I've gotten roses a couple times actually. But, see, my problem? I'm retarded and just feel bad when I get flowers.
Sophomore year was a better year than most of my school years. It was the only time I felt I had people who befriended me for who I was, and I had an almost-boyfriend, Josh. He was a baseman, and my stunting partner (the one who threw me into the air and such, hopefully to catch me). I went to the Sweetheart Dance with him around Valentine's Day, although I'm not even sure how it happened. The senior girls seemed to have set it up, Brooke gave me a dress I could borrow and Josh and I went out to eat at Mogger's with Sydney and Ostan before the dance. (My mom just informed me that we're going out to eat tonight... at Mogger's. Great.)
I did like Josh. But once I found out he liked me too, I got all shy and weird. Not that I wasn't all shy and weird before, but it made it worse. No guy I ever had a bit of a crush on ever returned those feelings, so I didn't know how to handle it. At the dance, I barely talked. Okay, not so weird for me, but I was also stricken with anxiety when it came to dancing. And if you know me, you know that's an unusual thing, because that's a place I totally let loose and am the opposite of shy. I danced with the girls a bit, but when Josh came around, I'd wanna hide in my shell. I did slow-dance with him once, but it just felt awkward... part of it was because he was so much taller than me. I just felt really bad, and then when it was over and he dropped me off I felt bad about feeling bad and wanted to run away into my house. Stupid bad cycle.
He came over to my house to give me a rose on Valentine's day. I stayed home (sick, I think) from school that day. Well, when I found out he was at the doorstep, I just panicked. I was wearing PJ's, hadn't any makeup on, and I don't even think I'd taken a shower. I thought he'd think I was hideous if I came to the door, so I didn't. Instead I felt like crying and told my sister to tell him I was sleeping or something. How's that for romantic?
Mostly when I think of that Valentine's Day, I remember having those friends and try to repress the other memories. I wasn't particularly close to them, but I loved those girls, they'd taken me under my wing and accepted me when I had no one. So for me, friendships should be what Valentine's Day is for anyway. Couples don't really need it, let them have their anniversaries.
Oh, and the other time I got flowers was the year before last, at work. It was a guy I worked with who I only thought of as a friend, but who I found out liked me. So, again, I just felt confused and anxious. Bah.
You Belong in 1968
1968
If you scored...
1950 - 1959: You're fun loving, romantic, and more than a little innocent. See you at the drive in!
1960 - 1969: You are a free spirit with a huge heart. Love, peace, and happiness rule - oh, and drugs too.
1970 - 1979: Bold and brash, you take life by the horns. Whether you're partying or protesting, you give it your all!
1980 - 1989: Wild, over the top, and just a little bit cheesy. You're colorful at night - and successful during the day.
1990 - 1999: With you anything goes! You're grunge one day, ghetto fabulous the next. It's all good!
What Year Do You Belong In?
You Are 22 Years Old
22
Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.
13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.
20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.
30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!
40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.
What Age Do You Act?
Okay, that's a bit odd.
You Are A Romantic
You are more romantic than 80% of the population.
You life your life like a fairy tale... or at least you try to.
Living for magical moments, you believe there's only one true love for you.
Love is the most important thing in your life, and you don't take it for granted.
Your perfect match loves to be in love as much as you do!
Are You Romantic or Realistic?
Huh?
Lastly, here's a Melanie wallpaper I made the other day, with lyrics from her song "Reason" (not that anyone particularly cares, heh).
I never really had a Valentine before. (I won't count elementary school when everyone brought a paper bag and decorated it, and then dropped cards and candy into each one.) Well, okay, so I lied... I've gotten roses a couple times actually. But, see, my problem? I'm retarded and just feel bad when I get flowers.
Sophomore year was a better year than most of my school years. It was the only time I felt I had people who befriended me for who I was, and I had an almost-boyfriend, Josh. He was a baseman, and my stunting partner (the one who threw me into the air and such, hopefully to catch me). I went to the Sweetheart Dance with him around Valentine's Day, although I'm not even sure how it happened. The senior girls seemed to have set it up, Brooke gave me a dress I could borrow and Josh and I went out to eat at Mogger's with Sydney and Ostan before the dance. (My mom just informed me that we're going out to eat tonight... at Mogger's. Great.)
I did like Josh. But once I found out he liked me too, I got all shy and weird. Not that I wasn't all shy and weird before, but it made it worse. No guy I ever had a bit of a crush on ever returned those feelings, so I didn't know how to handle it. At the dance, I barely talked. Okay, not so weird for me, but I was also stricken with anxiety when it came to dancing. And if you know me, you know that's an unusual thing, because that's a place I totally let loose and am the opposite of shy. I danced with the girls a bit, but when Josh came around, I'd wanna hide in my shell. I did slow-dance with him once, but it just felt awkward... part of it was because he was so much taller than me. I just felt really bad, and then when it was over and he dropped me off I felt bad about feeling bad and wanted to run away into my house. Stupid bad cycle.
He came over to my house to give me a rose on Valentine's day. I stayed home (sick, I think) from school that day. Well, when I found out he was at the doorstep, I just panicked. I was wearing PJ's, hadn't any makeup on, and I don't even think I'd taken a shower. I thought he'd think I was hideous if I came to the door, so I didn't. Instead I felt like crying and told my sister to tell him I was sleeping or something. How's that for romantic?
Mostly when I think of that Valentine's Day, I remember having those friends and try to repress the other memories. I wasn't particularly close to them, but I loved those girls, they'd taken me under my wing and accepted me when I had no one. So for me, friendships should be what Valentine's Day is for anyway. Couples don't really need it, let them have their anniversaries.
Oh, and the other time I got flowers was the year before last, at work. It was a guy I worked with who I only thought of as a friend, but who I found out liked me. So, again, I just felt confused and anxious. Bah.
You Belong in 1968
1968
If you scored...
1950 - 1959: You're fun loving, romantic, and more than a little innocent. See you at the drive in!
1960 - 1969: You are a free spirit with a huge heart. Love, peace, and happiness rule - oh, and drugs too.
1970 - 1979: Bold and brash, you take life by the horns. Whether you're partying or protesting, you give it your all!
1980 - 1989: Wild, over the top, and just a little bit cheesy. You're colorful at night - and successful during the day.
1990 - 1999: With you anything goes! You're grunge one day, ghetto fabulous the next. It's all good!
What Year Do You Belong In?
You Are 22 Years Old
22
Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.
13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.
20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.
30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!
40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.
What Age Do You Act?
Okay, that's a bit odd.
You Are A Romantic
You are more romantic than 80% of the population.
You life your life like a fairy tale... or at least you try to.
Living for magical moments, you believe there's only one true love for you.
Love is the most important thing in your life, and you don't take it for granted.
Your perfect match loves to be in love as much as you do!
Are You Romantic or Realistic?
Huh?
Lastly, here's a Melanie wallpaper I made the other day, with lyrics from her song "Reason" (not that anyone particularly cares, heh).
