Merry Christmas from Payless
I was perfectly fine until my mother picked m up and took me to her house tonight. We passed I-84 and it hit me, tis the holiday season... the multiple car headlights were like a majestic red and white tree of little glass twinklers... it put a knot in my stomach.
Most people would tell you anyone who's single is miserable during the holiday season, but I don't think it has anything to do with my romantic status, even when I'm sharing it with someone special... ad I have, don't get me wrong. But even when I'm doing it with my hand held tightly by someone I love, I still hate it... from November o January I'm in this horrible funk, I cry uncontrollably, I feel alone and completely useless. I'm not sure why... maybe it's because I can't ever seem to feel quite the same glowing happiness that those silly little people in my TV feel. 'Happy Holidays from Safeway... our family is prettier, better off, and much happier than you could ever be... keep that in mind when you're carving your turkey."
Every bad thing in my life runs through my mind, all the confusion, everything that makes my stomach clench, every sob I've had to muffle in my pillow over the past year.I'm tired of being people's recovery fling. The person who patches them up, makes them whole, so they can move on to bigger better things. I am a better a thing... and I pity you for not realizing it, all of you.
So go on, smile your fake little smiles, say cheers with a bunch of people you don't love and don't know, eat your turkey and burp up all those lies till your hears content. You're just a fucking advertisement.
Most people would tell you anyone who's single is miserable during the holiday season, but I don't think it has anything to do with my romantic status, even when I'm sharing it with someone special... ad I have, don't get me wrong. But even when I'm doing it with my hand held tightly by someone I love, I still hate it... from November o January I'm in this horrible funk, I cry uncontrollably, I feel alone and completely useless. I'm not sure why... maybe it's because I can't ever seem to feel quite the same glowing happiness that those silly little people in my TV feel. 'Happy Holidays from Safeway... our family is prettier, better off, and much happier than you could ever be... keep that in mind when you're carving your turkey."
Every bad thing in my life runs through my mind, all the confusion, everything that makes my stomach clench, every sob I've had to muffle in my pillow over the past year.I'm tired of being people's recovery fling. The person who patches them up, makes them whole, so they can move on to bigger better things. I am a better a thing... and I pity you for not realizing it, all of you.
So go on, smile your fake little smiles, say cheers with a bunch of people you don't love and don't know, eat your turkey and burp up all those lies till your hears content. You're just a fucking advertisement.