My life sounds much more amazing than it actually is ( Read more... )

Goddamn, I'm terrible at this. I'd probably do better if I actually had the internet at home, and didn't have to go to Starbucks or work to do, well, anything. But odds are it'll be a few weeks yet, since I'm a lazy fuck who can shirk responsibility with a nearly athletic vigor. I think one time I broke a sweat putting off a bill ( Read more... )

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Rather, Karma is awheel. Today I bent my bicycle's front wheel, and coming home from seeing a movie with chanceofgotham, I slid into a curb and bent my front left rim ( Read more... )

A few days ago, on my way home from WalMart, a guy in an SUV pulled up next to my truck and yelled, "HEY, YOU WANT TO SELL YOUR TRUCK ( Read more... )

Although I suspect that it's something I did, I'm still not sure why my entries refused to show up on friends lists about 9 months back. Going back and trying to retag them all, I realized that one of my entries - hillarious, I thought - was only read by one person.

As I have nothing new to write about today, either, I re-present to you my DMV ( Read more... )

This year at the NAIAS, Ford has released a new concept car called the SYNus. The name in itself is humorous enough, but the cavity in question has nothing to do with your nose 1.


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The DMV is killing Americans via fatal car accidents in order to control the population!

I'm becoming more and more convinced that the DMV is conspiring to kill off Americans by staging fatal automobile accidents. Why?

Simple. Population controlThe population of the world is increasing exponentially. If I hadn't told you that the graph below is ( Read more... )

I have discovered a conspiracy.

Apparently, the goddamn DMV is taking steps to ensure that getting a license is easier than ever. Unlike their old system, where all you needed was a pair of hands (not necessarily your own) and the ability to find the DMV (or a friend who'd take you), this new one actually delivers a license to where you might ( Read more... )