#55 Of Nostalgia and Hidden Tears
In my young eyes, she has always been a part of the “it” group. You know, girls who are friends, and at the same time popular, with the boys. In my young mind, those types of girls were the ones who were hard to reach, that someone like me could never be close friends with them (unless I let them copy my assignments, which never really crossed my mind at that time). She was one of them, but at the same time, she was different. Her name and her face were familiar to me, because I always saw her name on the papers being pasted on classroom doors every time the quarter ends, and I also always saw her during recognition exercises after every end of each school year. Yes, aside from being a part of the “it” group, she is also an achiever. I never really thought that I’d see her with the likes of nerds like me. We didn’t talk that much then. We knew each other, but at the same time, we didn’t.
Fifth grade. I think it was the first time that I had the chance to talk to her, being a co-delegate in a leadership seminar in Baguio City that we attended for a week. I came with my mom (I think I was sick then), so I wasn’t really able to talk and mingle much with my co-delegates. But, I do remember one quirky fact that happened then: we shared the same crush. Yes, people, the “it” girl and I shared the same taste in boys! I forgot when we talked, but I do know that it was about him. Fortunately for us (more for her, actually), the boy we liked was a very outgoing one. They became close, and being the wallflower that I am, I actually just looked at them from afar. No, don’t get me wrong: I wasn’t looking at them with eyes of envy. In fact, the shy girl that I was then felt really blessed to be friends with the said boy, expecting nothing more but that. There were other moments that I spent with her and my other newfound friends. Then, graduation came and we both bid farewell to the boy that we liked.
Sixth grade. I already had a firm resolution that whatever it takes, I will transfer to another school after graduation. With this goal in mind, I took entrance examinations in different science high schools that were known to my parents. Also, I was given another chance to participate in another leadership seminar, again held in Baguio City. The “it” girl also attended the said seminar, alongside other friends and classmates. We had been mere acquaintances all our elementary life, so it wasn’t really surprising for me that I hadn’t been able to really connect with her that well. I’m still blaming the wallflower in me for that. After that, results from the entrance examinations we took were released. I was really keen on enrolling in this certain high school because it was near our house, plus a boy who I liked would most likely enroll there. I debated with my parents, but I still took heed of their wish at the end, that I enroll in the same science high school where my older sister graduated. So, I was like, okay whatever I’ll do it. Never did I think that that decision would lead me to where I am right now.
High school. I was sad at first because I didn’t get my wish of enrolling in my desired school, and also because I thought I was the only one from my elementary school who decided to attend my current school. But, lo and behold, as I rode our service van going to school, I found the “it” girl sitting beside me, beaming and giving me a shy “good morning.” That’s when I thought that maybe, just maybe, this budding friendship that we started to have would last for a very long time.
She was like an older sister to me. You know, the type of older sister who gives advice to her naïve younger sister, always guiding her through new experiences in life. That became her role in my life. You see, I wasn’t really the outgoing, adventurous type. I preferred being in my comfort zone, away from the stresses and problems of life. For example, hmm, vegetables. Yes, vegetables and I were a big no-no combination. But, because of her, I started eating those things that I lovingly termed as “bitter leaves” (I’m sorry veggies, but if it helps, I now love eating salads :D) We talked about the most mundane and the most important things (at that particular moment/era), we ate a lot, we slept a lot (inside the service van) and we made a lot of good memories together. But of course, our experiences were definitely not just made out of happy moments. There were times wherein problems would arise, and she’ll come to me for advice, or maybe just for someone who’ll listen. I gave that to her, because I thought that it’s one of the simple ways in which I could be there for her. This was what friendship was for me, as simple-minded and as naïve as I was. From first year to third year, she has always been my beloved service-seatmate, and with those little moments, our friendship became stronger.
Of course, our social lives did not revolve around one another. We had other people hanging out with us, and it was fun. Truly, high school is one of the best times a student will ever experience. But despite not always being physically together, we shared this certain bond that we knew won’t be broken. It appeared like a silent veil hanging around us, connecting us always. We still updated each other about our respective lives, she knew my secrets and quirks, I knew some of hers. She threatened to rush and bring forth violence to the people who irritated and hurt me. I threatened to hit her head with anything within my reach whenever she does or implies something bad. I wasn’t that strong-willed, unlike her, so it was kind of weird that I got to bully her with my words. But I guess our friendship is weird like that, noh? But in reality, she has always been the strong one, between the two of us. I always felt protected and safe when I’m with her. Pretty much a reiteration of the older sister-younger sister relationship I’ve described a while ago.
High school went by like a blur, and here comes another chapter of our lives: College. We decided to go to different universities, thus the time we spent away from each other increased. We would still update each other once in a while, but time had always been an issue. A lot of things happened and lots of stories were left untold. But, despite the physical separation, I felt that the veil was still hanging around us. Stories were told over meals and coffee during meetups, and those moments really, really made me happy.
Fast forward to the present. Now, she’s already a certified public accountant. I’m now a medical student. Our dreams and aspirations in life are slowly unfolding right before our eyes. Before we know it, we’ll be an inch away from realizing our dreams. Yes, the “it” girl and I are now running towards our goals in life, and we’re not planning to stop halfway.
I just came home from having a coffee bonding with the “it” girl. I know I never told her this, but I always thought of her as a cool, tough chick. Haha, forgive me? That’s a compliment, you know. :P
Oh, and I'm not sure if you still remember, but we were classmates during our Senior Kinder year. A very early start, huh? ;)
The “it” girl will be leaving on Saturday. I know, I’m not supposed to be writing an entry because I still have a 7am class tomorrow, but I just wanted to express my feelings. Feelings of both gratitude and sadness. I want to thank you for being my friend, for putting up with me, for always being there in times of need, for threatening to kill anyone who has hurt me (haha), and for being like an older sister to me. We’ve known each other for more than half of our lives. Heck, we practically grew up together!
As you immerse yourself in another “adventure”, another chapter in your life begins. I know you’ll do well there. You always do! You can do it! :)
I’ll really, really miss you, my dear. No words can describe how happy I am to be your friend. Likewise, I thank God for giving me a friend like you. :)
(P.S. Once I get a decent ‘first boyfriend’ for myself, you’ll be one of the first few people to know, I promise! Just that, don’t expect it in the very near future, okay? xD And also, enjoy your "date" with Kuya on Wednesday ;) Haha!)
***
Early Histology class tomorrow. Haven't even finished reading the GI Physiology chapters in Berne yet. Long weekend = Lack of academic productivity o_O
Maa, maa. Ganbarimasu! ^^
Fifth grade. I think it was the first time that I had the chance to talk to her, being a co-delegate in a leadership seminar in Baguio City that we attended for a week. I came with my mom (I think I was sick then), so I wasn’t really able to talk and mingle much with my co-delegates. But, I do remember one quirky fact that happened then: we shared the same crush. Yes, people, the “it” girl and I shared the same taste in boys! I forgot when we talked, but I do know that it was about him. Fortunately for us (more for her, actually), the boy we liked was a very outgoing one. They became close, and being the wallflower that I am, I actually just looked at them from afar. No, don’t get me wrong: I wasn’t looking at them with eyes of envy. In fact, the shy girl that I was then felt really blessed to be friends with the said boy, expecting nothing more but that. There were other moments that I spent with her and my other newfound friends. Then, graduation came and we both bid farewell to the boy that we liked.
Sixth grade. I already had a firm resolution that whatever it takes, I will transfer to another school after graduation. With this goal in mind, I took entrance examinations in different science high schools that were known to my parents. Also, I was given another chance to participate in another leadership seminar, again held in Baguio City. The “it” girl also attended the said seminar, alongside other friends and classmates. We had been mere acquaintances all our elementary life, so it wasn’t really surprising for me that I hadn’t been able to really connect with her that well. I’m still blaming the wallflower in me for that. After that, results from the entrance examinations we took were released. I was really keen on enrolling in this certain high school because it was near our house, plus a boy who I liked would most likely enroll there. I debated with my parents, but I still took heed of their wish at the end, that I enroll in the same science high school where my older sister graduated. So, I was like, okay whatever I’ll do it. Never did I think that that decision would lead me to where I am right now.
High school. I was sad at first because I didn’t get my wish of enrolling in my desired school, and also because I thought I was the only one from my elementary school who decided to attend my current school. But, lo and behold, as I rode our service van going to school, I found the “it” girl sitting beside me, beaming and giving me a shy “good morning.” That’s when I thought that maybe, just maybe, this budding friendship that we started to have would last for a very long time.
She was like an older sister to me. You know, the type of older sister who gives advice to her naïve younger sister, always guiding her through new experiences in life. That became her role in my life. You see, I wasn’t really the outgoing, adventurous type. I preferred being in my comfort zone, away from the stresses and problems of life. For example, hmm, vegetables. Yes, vegetables and I were a big no-no combination. But, because of her, I started eating those things that I lovingly termed as “bitter leaves” (I’m sorry veggies, but if it helps, I now love eating salads :D) We talked about the most mundane and the most important things (at that particular moment/era), we ate a lot, we slept a lot (inside the service van) and we made a lot of good memories together. But of course, our experiences were definitely not just made out of happy moments. There were times wherein problems would arise, and she’ll come to me for advice, or maybe just for someone who’ll listen. I gave that to her, because I thought that it’s one of the simple ways in which I could be there for her. This was what friendship was for me, as simple-minded and as naïve as I was. From first year to third year, she has always been my beloved service-seatmate, and with those little moments, our friendship became stronger.
Of course, our social lives did not revolve around one another. We had other people hanging out with us, and it was fun. Truly, high school is one of the best times a student will ever experience. But despite not always being physically together, we shared this certain bond that we knew won’t be broken. It appeared like a silent veil hanging around us, connecting us always. We still updated each other about our respective lives, she knew my secrets and quirks, I knew some of hers. She threatened to rush and bring forth violence to the people who irritated and hurt me. I threatened to hit her head with anything within my reach whenever she does or implies something bad. I wasn’t that strong-willed, unlike her, so it was kind of weird that I got to bully her with my words. But I guess our friendship is weird like that, noh? But in reality, she has always been the strong one, between the two of us. I always felt protected and safe when I’m with her. Pretty much a reiteration of the older sister-younger sister relationship I’ve described a while ago.
High school went by like a blur, and here comes another chapter of our lives: College. We decided to go to different universities, thus the time we spent away from each other increased. We would still update each other once in a while, but time had always been an issue. A lot of things happened and lots of stories were left untold. But, despite the physical separation, I felt that the veil was still hanging around us. Stories were told over meals and coffee during meetups, and those moments really, really made me happy.
Fast forward to the present. Now, she’s already a certified public accountant. I’m now a medical student. Our dreams and aspirations in life are slowly unfolding right before our eyes. Before we know it, we’ll be an inch away from realizing our dreams. Yes, the “it” girl and I are now running towards our goals in life, and we’re not planning to stop halfway.
I just came home from having a coffee bonding with the “it” girl. I know I never told her this, but I always thought of her as a cool, tough chick. Haha, forgive me? That’s a compliment, you know. :P
Oh, and I'm not sure if you still remember, but we were classmates during our Senior Kinder year. A very early start, huh? ;)
The “it” girl will be leaving on Saturday. I know, I’m not supposed to be writing an entry because I still have a 7am class tomorrow, but I just wanted to express my feelings. Feelings of both gratitude and sadness. I want to thank you for being my friend, for putting up with me, for always being there in times of need, for threatening to kill anyone who has hurt me (haha), and for being like an older sister to me. We’ve known each other for more than half of our lives. Heck, we practically grew up together!
As you immerse yourself in another “adventure”, another chapter in your life begins. I know you’ll do well there. You always do! You can do it! :)
I’ll really, really miss you, my dear. No words can describe how happy I am to be your friend. Likewise, I thank God for giving me a friend like you. :)
(P.S. Once I get a decent ‘first boyfriend’ for myself, you’ll be one of the first few people to know, I promise! Just that, don’t expect it in the very near future, okay? xD And also, enjoy your "date" with Kuya on Wednesday ;) Haha!)
***
Early Histology class tomorrow. Haven't even finished reading the GI Physiology chapters in Berne yet. Long weekend = Lack of academic productivity o_O
Maa, maa. Ganbarimasu! ^^