It All Comes Down To Family

Dec 12, 2009 14:48

Title: It All Comes Down To Family
Rating: E
Characters/Parings: Castiel, Sam, Dean, Bobby/no pairings
Warnings: None
Spoilers: 5.10 Abandon All Hope, season four and five in general
Genres: General
Chapters: 1
Completed:Yes
Word Count: 1,239
Disclaimer: Characters not owned by moi, only used for my own amusement.
Summary: In the end, it all comes down to family. Even for angels.


Brothers I

Dean doesn’t think that Castiel can feel emotion. Dean doesn’t think that Castiel understands the bond of brotherhood that he and Sam share.

But he does.

Castiel knows that Dean will stop at nothing to protect his brother. And that he will never give up hope, not even when it’s so clear that Sam’s already been lost to temptation.

Castiel knows what Sam has done, what he’s doing, and what he will do, and Castiel knows that he cannot be trusted.

But then his own brothers and sisters in heaven are lost to darkness as well. They begin killing each other, and Castiel would give anything to make it stop. But it appears that a war is coming.

None of the angels can be trusted, for they have all betrayed Castiel in the past.

But still, he feels a secret trust for them anyway, a trust that perhaps they will realize the sin of their ways and come back to the light.

He feels something that would be called understanding now, for Dean and his brother.

Father

Castiel has never met Him, nor even heard His voice, or been in the glory of His presence.

But he has felt His love, and known His grace. This is why he keeps looking, though demons, the Winchesters, even his own brothers and sisters say his mission is futile.

He has always been faithful, but while being in this human vessel and walking on God’s Earth, he has been tempted by doubt.

And yes, sometimes he does wonder if he can find his Father, or if he’s on a fool’s mission.

But he does not stop, because he knows his Father is out there to be found.

He has faith.

Brothers II

He battled through Hell for Dean, and now fights next to him in the war of Heaven and Hell.

At first he felt nothing for Dean, for he did not feel anything at all. But as emotions and feelings crept into his consciousness, he became aware of something akin to a bond between himself and Dean.

Dean had not liked him at first, and Castiel had been filled with confusion about the human’s mixed emotions and rebellion.

But now he feels, and he knows that perhaps he and Dean are now friends. This puzzles him and fills him with another emotion: something close to happiness, or perhaps hope.

He is not sure of the relation between himself and the vessel of Michael, if there even is one.

But he knows that he will fight along Dean’s side just as hard as he had once fought alongside his own brothers.

Uncle

“Family don’t end in blood, boy.”

Castiel has heard this thought crossing Dean’s mind before, and had not known where it came from until Bobby Singer had repeated it to Dean in Castiel’s presence.

Dean wished to go on a fool’s errand, to kill the devil. The odds were stacked against them, but the boy still had hope, and Castiel could only wonder where it came from.

Bobby thought he should help, which Castiel silently did not agree with. Bobby was in a wheel chair, and if he were to come on their mission, it was likely that he would not return.

Dean must have thought something along the same lines, and said so. But Bobby did not take Dean’s refusal well. He reminded Dean that this was his family as well, though they were not related by blood.

Castiel feels a warmth when he remembers these words, for he now knows what it means to have family whom you share no blood relation with.

Castiel has two families now, his brothers in heaven and his family here, on Earth.

Brothers III

Castiel is still wary of Sam. His bond to Dean does not necessarily extend itself completely to his brother, and frankly, he does not trust him.

Simply, Sam has betrayed Dean and himself in the past, and there is no reason to think he might not do it again.

Castiel keeps an eye on him, though Sam says that he has been cleaned of the unholy demon blood since Lucifer’s rising.

But it is precaution.

One night Castiel appears in Dean and Sam’s motel room. Dean is asleep, snoring softly. Sam is kneeling beside his own bed, something clutched within his hands. He is muttering to himself, deep in concentration.

Castiel cocks his head, and sees that Sam is holding rosary beads.

Sam looks up, and sees Castiel there. He is surprised, then embarrassed.

“Oh, uh, hey Cas,” he says.

Castiel frowns. “Were you…praying?”

Sam is only slightly taken aback by his straightforwardness, for he is used to it by now. Sam nods.

“Yeah, I was.”

Castiel frowns again and sits on Sam’s bed. There has been endless loss, endless destruction in the past few months. Ever since Lucifer rose, hope has been next to non-existent, faith even more so.

Castiel wonders how this child who has been tainted by darkness could possibly hold onto faith.

“I did not know you prayed,” Castiel says.

Sam nods, and sits down next to Castiel. He looks at the beads, rubbing his fingers over them.

“I stopped praying after Dean went to Hell. I used to pray every night before then, but after Dean died…I just couldn’t believe in a God anymore.”

“But,” Sam continues, “After this whole angels and demons war started…I don’t know, I just felt like I was going to fall apart if I didn’t have someone to have faith in.”

Castiel nods. He knows the feeling all too well.

“You need not be ashamed of prayer. It is what connects us with the Lord.”

Sam looks guilty, and glances over at Dean. “He wouldn’t understand.”

Castiel knows that Dean does not have much faith in God, but also knows that Sam would be surprised as to how capable of faith Dean is.

Though Dean is not faithful in a God, he has immeasurable faith in his brother.

Castiel only says, “Perhaps,” to Sam, and leaves it at that. He has another question though, one that he feels as though he needs to be answered.

“What do you pray for?”

Sam is slightly surprised by this question, but answers. “I…pray for a lot of things, I guess. I pray that Dean will be okay, that maybe he can actually be happy. I pray that Bobby’s legs will heal and that Joe and Ellen are in Heaven…”

Sam looks at Castiel. “I pray for you too, if you can believe it.”

Castiel is surprised. “You pray for an angel?”

Sam laughs, but there is no humor in it. “I do. That you’ll find God. I know how hard it must be to keep believing that you’ll find him, but I pray that you do. And…I pray that this war will be over, so that you won’t have to fight with the other angels anymore.” Sam can still remember the confrontation between Castiel and Gabriel. “I know how hard it can be to fight your own family.”

“More than any other trial I have faced,” Castiel says, knowing that Sam understands him perhaps more than anyone else can. It is an odd feeling, to be understood, but Castiel holds onto it.

“What do you pray for?” Sam asks him, looking once again at his rosary beads.

Castiel looks at Sam, and their eyes meet.

“I pray for hope.”

supernatural, fic

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