Black Friday
I must admit it! My mother and I are annual Black Friday adventurers. I know many of you think that only crazy people partake in this yearly ritual of bargain hunting, but I must disagree. I’m only out for a good deal, not to hurt others. Let me give you a little taste of what the average schedule for Black Friday is for my mother and I:
4:30- Wake up and brush hair and teeth. Put on some warm clothes and stumble to car.
5:00- Arrive at Wal-Mart but remain nice and warm in car while people outside in line freeze. Drink some coffee and talk about plans.
5:25- Exit car and move to front entrance of Wal-Mart. (By the time, the line has disappeared and a large mob of people is just standing around. Only experienced Bargain Hunters know this secret move.)
5:30- Enter Wal-Mart. Protect any ligaments and clothing while herd pushes forward. (It’s important to watch out for your heels. People use carts as plows at this time and don’t care about anyone else.)
6:15- Pay for treasures found at Check out.
6:30- Enter Kmart.
6:35- Leave Kmart. (Kmart doesn’t have many good deals.)
6:50- Arrive at Mall.
7:00- Enter either Bon ton or JCPenny. Fight with other customers over free items (such as snow globes, jewelry, ornaments, etc.)
7:30- Wait in line for 45 minutes.
8:20- Enter either Bon ton or JCPenny (depending on which you have already been to) and repeat.
9:30- Walk through rest of mall. Find nothing.
10:30- Home and in bed.
Now, every year is different. This year, my mom and I accidentally slept in and missed the herd into Wal-Mart. That’s ok though. We really didn’t miss it.
Most of the Black Fridays I have experienced haven’t been that bad (except for the time this woman hit me really hard with a cart, so I pushed her cart over). My mom has experienced many more than I have. Next time you see her, ask her about the Cabbage Patch Kid incident.
Take care everyone, and happy hunting!
4:30- Wake up and brush hair and teeth. Put on some warm clothes and stumble to car.
5:00- Arrive at Wal-Mart but remain nice and warm in car while people outside in line freeze. Drink some coffee and talk about plans.
5:25- Exit car and move to front entrance of Wal-Mart. (By the time, the line has disappeared and a large mob of people is just standing around. Only experienced Bargain Hunters know this secret move.)
5:30- Enter Wal-Mart. Protect any ligaments and clothing while herd pushes forward. (It’s important to watch out for your heels. People use carts as plows at this time and don’t care about anyone else.)
6:15- Pay for treasures found at Check out.
6:30- Enter Kmart.
6:35- Leave Kmart. (Kmart doesn’t have many good deals.)
6:50- Arrive at Mall.
7:00- Enter either Bon ton or JCPenny. Fight with other customers over free items (such as snow globes, jewelry, ornaments, etc.)
7:30- Wait in line for 45 minutes.
8:20- Enter either Bon ton or JCPenny (depending on which you have already been to) and repeat.
9:30- Walk through rest of mall. Find nothing.
10:30- Home and in bed.
Now, every year is different. This year, my mom and I accidentally slept in and missed the herd into Wal-Mart. That’s ok though. We really didn’t miss it.
Most of the Black Fridays I have experienced haven’t been that bad (except for the time this woman hit me really hard with a cart, so I pushed her cart over). My mom has experienced many more than I have. Next time you see her, ask her about the Cabbage Patch Kid incident.
Take care everyone, and happy hunting!