Ugh
Ugh ugh ugh.
It is a rare thing for a Duckie to take a strong and immediate dislike to one of her girls' boyfolk. Most of the time, my friends pick winners.
But Lizz brought home a breathtakingly egotistical photographer with no brain-mouth filter and the attention span of a gnat, who cannot hold a coherent conversation because he's too busy informing the breakfast table that, "One really awesome acid trip, I fucked a lesbian."
Ugh.
He told Lizz her dogs would recognize a man's authority and listen to him instead of her. Then when her Yorkie ignored him and ran the fuck away, he said, "See? That's right, she knows who to be scared of."
He is incapable of taking part in a conversation that is not focused on him, his interests, or his opinions - he can't even manage for a minute at a time. Lizz and I were talking about yesterday's motorcycle adventure for a whole thirty seconds before he interrupted with a story about tripping balls and getting laid. He is also one of those insufferable assholes who take pride in "complete honesty," regardless of tact, courtesy, or relevance.
The "I fucked a lesbian" story was shortly followed by His Thoughts On Yaoi, during which he told me that homosexuality is not a sexual orientation, but rather the result of deep-seated sexual issues, perversion, or confusion. Deep down, lesbians really do want cock. He knows this because he once fucked a married lesbian. Also, homosexuality is a sin, like adultery or premarital sex. (Seriously, premarital sex. After he just spent the fucking night.) Don't hate gay people just because they're sinners - we all are.
I try very hard not to be rude to people for their religious beliefs, no matter how strange or baseless I find them. But I was seething and offended and I could not stand him, and so I raised an eyebrow and said, "You believe in the concept of sin?"
Which then launched him into a Calvinist screed about how some people are destined for heaven from birth, and he thinks he might be one of them, but he's not really sure.
"Duckie is an atheist," Lizz informed him, in a please-shut-up mutter.
"Oh, well, the god I believe in is probably totally different from anything you've ever - "
"No," I cut him off. I had no desire to hear what a Speshul Snowflake of an imaginary friend he'd invented for himself. "I once argued about the Problem of Evil with a man who told me his 'god' was a yet-undiscovered unifying theory of the universe which would tie together all scientific knowledge from quantum mechanics to natural selection. Your god cannot surprise me."
At which point Lizz got up to clear dishes and ask if anyone wanted more orange juice.
I'm inexperienced at disliking people, but for him I'll make a real effort.
It is a rare thing for a Duckie to take a strong and immediate dislike to one of her girls' boyfolk. Most of the time, my friends pick winners.
But Lizz brought home a breathtakingly egotistical photographer with no brain-mouth filter and the attention span of a gnat, who cannot hold a coherent conversation because he's too busy informing the breakfast table that, "One really awesome acid trip, I fucked a lesbian."
Ugh.
He told Lizz her dogs would recognize a man's authority and listen to him instead of her. Then when her Yorkie ignored him and ran the fuck away, he said, "See? That's right, she knows who to be scared of."
He is incapable of taking part in a conversation that is not focused on him, his interests, or his opinions - he can't even manage for a minute at a time. Lizz and I were talking about yesterday's motorcycle adventure for a whole thirty seconds before he interrupted with a story about tripping balls and getting laid. He is also one of those insufferable assholes who take pride in "complete honesty," regardless of tact, courtesy, or relevance.
The "I fucked a lesbian" story was shortly followed by His Thoughts On Yaoi, during which he told me that homosexuality is not a sexual orientation, but rather the result of deep-seated sexual issues, perversion, or confusion. Deep down, lesbians really do want cock. He knows this because he once fucked a married lesbian. Also, homosexuality is a sin, like adultery or premarital sex. (Seriously, premarital sex. After he just spent the fucking night.) Don't hate gay people just because they're sinners - we all are.
I try very hard not to be rude to people for their religious beliefs, no matter how strange or baseless I find them. But I was seething and offended and I could not stand him, and so I raised an eyebrow and said, "You believe in the concept of sin?"
Which then launched him into a Calvinist screed about how some people are destined for heaven from birth, and he thinks he might be one of them, but he's not really sure.
"Duckie is an atheist," Lizz informed him, in a please-shut-up mutter.
"Oh, well, the god I believe in is probably totally different from anything you've ever - "
"No," I cut him off. I had no desire to hear what a Speshul Snowflake of an imaginary friend he'd invented for himself. "I once argued about the Problem of Evil with a man who told me his 'god' was a yet-undiscovered unifying theory of the universe which would tie together all scientific knowledge from quantum mechanics to natural selection. Your god cannot surprise me."
At which point Lizz got up to clear dishes and ask if anyone wanted more orange juice.
I'm inexperienced at disliking people, but for him I'll make a real effort.