Woof woof!!!
I will never understand my two pet humans, Lila and Minto...
Yesterday, I was at my usual watch post, guarding the family home from marauding men. There are those who come and steal empty milk bottles and insist on dumping full ones in our porch. There are also men who come and dump envelopes in our porch as well, and Lila and Minto usually open these before throwing them away, but I would not bother. They put these papery things in a bag outside, but even then, there are men who have the nerve to steal them! Right under our noses!!
And let's not forget all those cats that walk by our house, flaunting their felinousity, as well as dogs who think that just 'cos their human is with them it gives them some sort of right to walk right past our house! The very nerve of some animals!!!
I see them off, I do. Give them a right good barking at that sends them all fleeing in mortal terror. They ph33r me!!!!
Anyway, my watch post is on the first floor. The window there goes right down to the floor, so I can see out and view the whole street. For some strange reason my humans pull a curtain across it when it gets dark, which stops me doing my job properly. So yesterday I was really givin' it large, showing some marauding miscreant how big and tough I am, throwing myself at the window, barking furiously. I was really giving it some! Then this curtain thing attacked me! Obviously in league with the miscreants!! Not content with stopping me doing my job in the evening, it attacked me in daylight!!! It leapt off the wall onto me, complete with the pole!!!! I was right annoyed, but I did kill it. It was dead on the floor when Lila came rushing in.
To be honest, she was more annoyed about the state of that wretched curtain than her faithful doggie who bravely defends the home! She wants Minto to put that curtain back up. Minto said he'll do it "when he get a round tuit". If I find that round tuit first, I'm gonna kill it and bury it in the garden! I don't want that wretched curtain going back!
Grrrrrrrr!!!!!!
Despite my heroism, my humans don't seem very happy with me right now. I don't understand why...
Yesterday, I was at my usual watch post, guarding the family home from marauding men. There are those who come and steal empty milk bottles and insist on dumping full ones in our porch. There are also men who come and dump envelopes in our porch as well, and Lila and Minto usually open these before throwing them away, but I would not bother. They put these papery things in a bag outside, but even then, there are men who have the nerve to steal them! Right under our noses!!
And let's not forget all those cats that walk by our house, flaunting their felinousity, as well as dogs who think that just 'cos their human is with them it gives them some sort of right to walk right past our house! The very nerve of some animals!!!
I see them off, I do. Give them a right good barking at that sends them all fleeing in mortal terror. They ph33r me!!!!
Anyway, my watch post is on the first floor. The window there goes right down to the floor, so I can see out and view the whole street. For some strange reason my humans pull a curtain across it when it gets dark, which stops me doing my job properly. So yesterday I was really givin' it large, showing some marauding miscreant how big and tough I am, throwing myself at the window, barking furiously. I was really giving it some! Then this curtain thing attacked me! Obviously in league with the miscreants!! Not content with stopping me doing my job in the evening, it attacked me in daylight!!! It leapt off the wall onto me, complete with the pole!!!! I was right annoyed, but I did kill it. It was dead on the floor when Lila came rushing in.
To be honest, she was more annoyed about the state of that wretched curtain than her faithful doggie who bravely defends the home! She wants Minto to put that curtain back up. Minto said he'll do it "when he get a round tuit". If I find that round tuit first, I'm gonna kill it and bury it in the garden! I don't want that wretched curtain going back!
Grrrrrrrr!!!!!!
Despite my heroism, my humans don't seem very happy with me right now. I don't understand why...