....
all i ever seem to do is hurt people. and worst of all, i'm feeling self-pity. i mean, im feeling alot of self hate as well, but i still deserve pity from no one, least of all my self. i fuck things up due to my selfish ass nature, and can't seem to do anything right. i've hurt the one person who means more to me than anyone else ever has AGAIN. and its through my uncertainty. i should have known i couldnt do it while i was up there. but i spose i just hoped and wouldnt admit it. but the problem is, that every minute i'm away, i'm thinking about the last time i saw her, and i can't deal with taht. i was so distraught at how upset she was that i wasnt paying attention and fell asleep on the metro.sucked. well. yea. please don't comment with comfort, cause i don't deserve it, nor really want it right now - this is something i have to deal with, because i brought it down on myself...