I turn my back for one second!
And find out the window of opportunity that I'd been hoping for has already opened and shut big time.
I mentioned I'd be reading "Cook's Tour" on this trip right? I'm almost done. It's magnificent. If I hadn't already known that Tony picked up and moved to Vietnam for a year I would have guessed it was in the future. He writes, "I love it here" on nearly every page. While there are only one chapter of every other place he visited, there are numerous dedicated to Vietnam throughout the book. So yeah, he moved to Vietnam for year. And I guess now he's back.
But here's the deal. I wrote Ellen and said, you know, I am really really really jealous of Nancy (his wife, of like a gabrillion years). Or maybe I said hate, or despise. Whatever, she's lucky because we all lust over him and he's not exactly typically lust-afterable. And yes, he's a bad-ass cook but he's the skinniest man on the planet, I believe his arms are at their thickest the same diameter as my wrist, and there was that icky heroin thing he had going on. But still, freaking sexy (also I just realized the same women on my tribe who lust after Tony Bourdain also see Mick Jagger as somebody they still want to you know). Anyway, Ellen does a quick search and finds out something interesting.
They split. All the travelling to eat the perfect meal on earth broke them up.
And.
He just had a baby with some Italian .... female.
How did that happen so fast and how did I miss it? Where was I? I mean maybe I wouldn't have been a match for some Italian....female. But damn I at least wanted a shot at sleeping with him! And having him cook some steak for me.
Life is so unfair. Seriously.
And now I just feel super bad for Nancy.
I mentioned I'd be reading "Cook's Tour" on this trip right? I'm almost done. It's magnificent. If I hadn't already known that Tony picked up and moved to Vietnam for a year I would have guessed it was in the future. He writes, "I love it here" on nearly every page. While there are only one chapter of every other place he visited, there are numerous dedicated to Vietnam throughout the book. So yeah, he moved to Vietnam for year. And I guess now he's back.
But here's the deal. I wrote Ellen and said, you know, I am really really really jealous of Nancy (his wife, of like a gabrillion years). Or maybe I said hate, or despise. Whatever, she's lucky because we all lust over him and he's not exactly typically lust-afterable. And yes, he's a bad-ass cook but he's the skinniest man on the planet, I believe his arms are at their thickest the same diameter as my wrist, and there was that icky heroin thing he had going on. But still, freaking sexy (also I just realized the same women on my tribe who lust after Tony Bourdain also see Mick Jagger as somebody they still want to you know). Anyway, Ellen does a quick search and finds out something interesting.
They split. All the travelling to eat the perfect meal on earth broke them up.
And.
He just had a baby with some Italian .... female.
How did that happen so fast and how did I miss it? Where was I? I mean maybe I wouldn't have been a match for some Italian....female. But damn I at least wanted a shot at sleeping with him! And having him cook some steak for me.
Life is so unfair. Seriously.
And now I just feel super bad for Nancy.