It's been awhile~
Hello!
I don't really post in here much because I don't have very many friends on livejournal, but than I remember that I post to get things off of my chest,and post for myself not neccessarily for others. UvU
It's been quite rough being home after being at boarding school for so long. My mom is suddenly always angry with me for every little thing I do, and it is very stressful. She's like a bomb- the littlest thing sets her off. I think that she is mad at my dad and taking it off of me, but she doesn't admit to that. It's very hard on me, I never know when she might explode again.
My body image has been up and down, some days I feel prettier than others, and vice versa. I really want to be able to feel good about myself, but its so hard. I've always struggled with this. I wish I didn't have to wear a wig every day! But if I don't wear a wig, I do not feel confident enough to even leave the house. Make up as well.
Then there's the boy issue. I'm just...sad he hasn't been online to talk to since school let out. And it's super hard to get in contact with him, since he lives in Japan! I know he's probably super busy catching up with his friends and his band and is rumored to have a job, but it would be nice to talk to him, even for a little bit! I wonder if he even likes me anymore. Its hard to tell. It seems like he has such a playboy exterior, but one of his close friends says that that is all for show, and that he actually has a big heart. And he is very sweet! I miss him very much. I wish we had started talking sooner. And I wish he asked me out as well! His friend told me he wanted to ;w;
Anyway, some good things have been happening as well.
I got to see some friends a bout a week ago, and dressed in lolita for the first time in over a year! It really was a lot of fun! I'm getting back into the style again. It really makes me feel special. I'm selling my old stuff and buying some new things-though mostly replicas. I don't have the money for brand right now, and I'd rather have more dresses to mix and match...plus I can't dress in lolita as often as I would like to! I got a Milky Planet replica in the yellow colorway, and a Sugary Carnival in the black. Once I sell one or two more JSKs, than I think I will use that money to get a pink blouse and some accessories.
I think that's it for now. There are some other smaller things on my mind, but I think I will keep them to myself UxU
I don't really post in here much because I don't have very many friends on livejournal, but than I remember that I post to get things off of my chest,and post for myself not neccessarily for others. UvU
It's been quite rough being home after being at boarding school for so long. My mom is suddenly always angry with me for every little thing I do, and it is very stressful. She's like a bomb- the littlest thing sets her off. I think that she is mad at my dad and taking it off of me, but she doesn't admit to that. It's very hard on me, I never know when she might explode again.
My body image has been up and down, some days I feel prettier than others, and vice versa. I really want to be able to feel good about myself, but its so hard. I've always struggled with this. I wish I didn't have to wear a wig every day! But if I don't wear a wig, I do not feel confident enough to even leave the house. Make up as well.
Then there's the boy issue. I'm just...sad he hasn't been online to talk to since school let out. And it's super hard to get in contact with him, since he lives in Japan! I know he's probably super busy catching up with his friends and his band and is rumored to have a job, but it would be nice to talk to him, even for a little bit! I wonder if he even likes me anymore. Its hard to tell. It seems like he has such a playboy exterior, but one of his close friends says that that is all for show, and that he actually has a big heart. And he is very sweet! I miss him very much. I wish we had started talking sooner. And I wish he asked me out as well! His friend told me he wanted to ;w;
Anyway, some good things have been happening as well.
I got to see some friends a bout a week ago, and dressed in lolita for the first time in over a year! It really was a lot of fun! I'm getting back into the style again. It really makes me feel special. I'm selling my old stuff and buying some new things-though mostly replicas. I don't have the money for brand right now, and I'd rather have more dresses to mix and match...plus I can't dress in lolita as often as I would like to! I got a Milky Planet replica in the yellow colorway, and a Sugary Carnival in the black. Once I sell one or two more JSKs, than I think I will use that money to get a pink blouse and some accessories.
I think that's it for now. There are some other smaller things on my mind, but I think I will keep them to myself UxU