hate.
i hate him. i never want a single thought of him to cross my mind ever again.
thanks for taking his side bailey. an even better friend you are.
sometimes i wonder how i surround myself which such undoubtably immature and selfish individuals. and i wonder even more, why the fuck do i give in to them over and over again? why do i forgive them, why am i always the one apologizing for shit i didn't even do? why do i tolerate people that get a kick out of making me feel like complete crap? i would rather have no friends, than friends that are going to turn their back on me everytime we get into a petty argument and say nasty things about me while taking sides with the one person they know treats me the worst. and then when i say... "hey, i'm sorry, let's just forget it" even when it shouldnt even be my initiative to make up, they're totally like "ok. and yeah... he's such a dick. i agree." wtf?
i'm just over it. i'm tired of letting things go. I don't believe in holding grudges. but when your best friend is referring to you as a self-righteous whore, and you're ex-boyfriend likes to take every opportunity he can to make you cry and say some of the most awful and degrading things a person can say to you, why should that be ok? why should i say.. hey yeah, i know you didn't mean it, don't worry about it? if they didn't mean it, they wouldn't say/do these things over and over again. they only do because as he (for example) has said to others, "she'll forgive me, she always does." fuck that. i'm tired of people taking advantage of me and just walking all over me.
i know the things they say shouldnt bother me. i know everyone tells me it shouldnt. especially becuase i know they aren't true. i'm not a whore. i don't even have to prove that one to anyone. but the fact that people i consider my friends and people that i care about despite all the bullshit and everything are calling me these things, it hurts.
i guess this is where i figure out that these aren't the people i should be wasting my time caring/worrying about. i'm done.
thanks for taking his side bailey. an even better friend you are.
sometimes i wonder how i surround myself which such undoubtably immature and selfish individuals. and i wonder even more, why the fuck do i give in to them over and over again? why do i forgive them, why am i always the one apologizing for shit i didn't even do? why do i tolerate people that get a kick out of making me feel like complete crap? i would rather have no friends, than friends that are going to turn their back on me everytime we get into a petty argument and say nasty things about me while taking sides with the one person they know treats me the worst. and then when i say... "hey, i'm sorry, let's just forget it" even when it shouldnt even be my initiative to make up, they're totally like "ok. and yeah... he's such a dick. i agree." wtf?
i'm just over it. i'm tired of letting things go. I don't believe in holding grudges. but when your best friend is referring to you as a self-righteous whore, and you're ex-boyfriend likes to take every opportunity he can to make you cry and say some of the most awful and degrading things a person can say to you, why should that be ok? why should i say.. hey yeah, i know you didn't mean it, don't worry about it? if they didn't mean it, they wouldn't say/do these things over and over again. they only do because as he (for example) has said to others, "she'll forgive me, she always does." fuck that. i'm tired of people taking advantage of me and just walking all over me.
i know the things they say shouldnt bother me. i know everyone tells me it shouldnt. especially becuase i know they aren't true. i'm not a whore. i don't even have to prove that one to anyone. but the fact that people i consider my friends and people that i care about despite all the bullshit and everything are calling me these things, it hurts.
i guess this is where i figure out that these aren't the people i should be wasting my time caring/worrying about. i'm done.