Fic: Spring
Title: Spring
Author: Demeter
Fandom: Dollhouse
Pairing: Caroline/Bennett
Disclaimer: Dollhouse belongs to Joss Whedon & Fox, and after watching that show, I could finally understand what all the fuss about the man was all about.
A/N: This was written for yetanothermask for her donation to help_japan. Thank you! Every now and then, it's great when you're challenged to do something completely different. Thanks also to qbeck for rewatching Dollhouse with me.
Spring
By Demeter
The Dollhouse destroys. People, relationships, promises. Caroline once thought that a human connection and a good plan could overcome the greed and evil of a few people. Together with her allies, she had managed to avert the apocalypse, but victory had come with many losses. As she wanders around the buildings that had once housed the university, she thinks of Bennett.
The first woman who fell for her, for real. Later, it didn’t matter anymore. Echo could be anyone whose imprint was put into her brain, gay, straight, irresistible and whatever worked for the Dollhouse’s agenda. The first woman who had truly hated her.
That knowledge had always hurt more than any of the torture Caroline had been subjected to in the DC lab. Because this hadn’t been Bennett, it had been who they’d made her. They could turn anyone, a sharp mind and kind person to a cold, soulless scientist. That was another form of torture. Even worse, Caroline knows she isn’t innocent in this. She sits on the bench in front of the rosebushes, inhaling their scent. Like that other time. It was here where they’d first kissed.
They’d been nervous, just a little over 48 hours away from the big day that was going to change the world. Bennett was scared, so Caroline had to pretend that she wasn’t. If anything, she could put on a brave front, something that had helped her survive later when the unspeakable happened. They’d had some wine at another student’s party, pretend normal, and were a little tipsy. This was where the human connection came in. They’d been righteous and naive enough to think that they could take on the monster Rossum all on their own, and that their friendship would remain untouched.
Caroline smiles sadly at the memory. She’d seen Bennett look at her, but she’d mistaken those looks for admiration due to her partly fake bravado. The kiss came as a surprise, but she enjoyed it anyway. Maybe Bennett needed a good reason to risk a brilliant career and, possibly, her life. They’d considered the danger, on the theoretical level. They couldn’t acknowledge the whole extent of it, or they would have never dared to carry through with the plan. Maybe Caroline needed a good reason, too, because part of her knew that she was exposing both of them to likely harm.
“I’ve never had a friend like you,” Bennett says when they are in her room, and Caroline laughs, because the same is true for her. They kiss again, passionately, with the desperation of two people who know that the day after tomorrow, life as they knew it will be over. One way or another. They could save humankind. They could end up in jail. Clothes get strewn over the floor, and finally, the feel of warm skin overcomes the lingering fear.
It’s the last time they get to share this tenderness... And trust.
Caroline has seldom cried through all of this; there wasn’t the time and space with Echo and various other people in her head, but she feels her eyes sting now. If Bennett had ever understood that Caroline had left her behind to save her, would that make a difference? She’d still be dead. Maybe it’s that selfishness that Caroline has often been accused of, that she would want the truth to be known.
What an irony that Bennett died helping to put Caroline back together when there was nothing more left than a damaged imprint. With the hope to finally have her revenge, granted, but still. There’s always been an intensity.
“What do you want to do once we’ve done this?” Bennett asks as they lie together in a close embrace, trying to understand what has just happened. It’s a loaded question. Bennett has her path figured out for her, many awards in her future, with an income that her past bullies could only dream of.
Caroline... She’s not so sure. She wants to save Bennett from said bullies as long as she can. She wants to save the world. She wants to do everything.
“More of this,” she says, turning to Bennett and kissing her, running a hand down her side, her thigh and back up. For a little while, she’s successfully evaded the question.
Caroline has done pretty much everything, though it’s been nothing like she’d ever imagined. She didn’t manage to bring the world forward, to a kinder future, so sometimes it feels like nothing was gained, but that isn’t true. They stopped the world from burning.
She had her part in it, and so did Bennett. It’s been a long war, but they’ve stopped the enemy for future generations who will never know what they’ve been spared.
The Dollhouse sent Echo to ‘romantic engagement’ with women seven times, married her off to one. Caroline can access those memories if she wants to. With her, she also keeps the memories of the people they once were, Caroline Farrell and Bennett Halverson. Their connection, and the promise.
No one could make her forget that. Caroline gets up and continues to walk along the path they’d been going together, comes by the area where there used to be the table where they first met.
She can’t turn back time, take away her pain, or Bennett’s, the betrayal, perceived and real. She can only try to be her best. There’s a part of her that will always remember the vision they shared, and the passion that got them there. We won, she thinks stubbornly.
Next to her, Bennett is asleep. Caroline brushes a strand of hair away from her face, just for a moment thinking what if they simply forgot about the plan? Just go on with life as if they weren’t aware of hell about to break loose. She’s tempted. Then, she lets the thought go. It’s not just about them.
Having abandoned memory lane, Caroline sits back in her car, pulling out of the parking lot. She feels calm, and with that, she’s finally letting go of the guilt, too. It’s like after a long winter, there are finally the first signs of spring.
Author: Demeter
Fandom: Dollhouse
Pairing: Caroline/Bennett
Disclaimer: Dollhouse belongs to Joss Whedon & Fox, and after watching that show, I could finally understand what all the fuss about the man was all about.
A/N: This was written for yetanothermask for her donation to help_japan. Thank you! Every now and then, it's great when you're challenged to do something completely different. Thanks also to qbeck for rewatching Dollhouse with me.
Spring
By Demeter
The Dollhouse destroys. People, relationships, promises. Caroline once thought that a human connection and a good plan could overcome the greed and evil of a few people. Together with her allies, she had managed to avert the apocalypse, but victory had come with many losses. As she wanders around the buildings that had once housed the university, she thinks of Bennett.
The first woman who fell for her, for real. Later, it didn’t matter anymore. Echo could be anyone whose imprint was put into her brain, gay, straight, irresistible and whatever worked for the Dollhouse’s agenda. The first woman who had truly hated her.
That knowledge had always hurt more than any of the torture Caroline had been subjected to in the DC lab. Because this hadn’t been Bennett, it had been who they’d made her. They could turn anyone, a sharp mind and kind person to a cold, soulless scientist. That was another form of torture. Even worse, Caroline knows she isn’t innocent in this. She sits on the bench in front of the rosebushes, inhaling their scent. Like that other time. It was here where they’d first kissed.
They’d been nervous, just a little over 48 hours away from the big day that was going to change the world. Bennett was scared, so Caroline had to pretend that she wasn’t. If anything, she could put on a brave front, something that had helped her survive later when the unspeakable happened. They’d had some wine at another student’s party, pretend normal, and were a little tipsy. This was where the human connection came in. They’d been righteous and naive enough to think that they could take on the monster Rossum all on their own, and that their friendship would remain untouched.
Caroline smiles sadly at the memory. She’d seen Bennett look at her, but she’d mistaken those looks for admiration due to her partly fake bravado. The kiss came as a surprise, but she enjoyed it anyway. Maybe Bennett needed a good reason to risk a brilliant career and, possibly, her life. They’d considered the danger, on the theoretical level. They couldn’t acknowledge the whole extent of it, or they would have never dared to carry through with the plan. Maybe Caroline needed a good reason, too, because part of her knew that she was exposing both of them to likely harm.
“I’ve never had a friend like you,” Bennett says when they are in her room, and Caroline laughs, because the same is true for her. They kiss again, passionately, with the desperation of two people who know that the day after tomorrow, life as they knew it will be over. One way or another. They could save humankind. They could end up in jail. Clothes get strewn over the floor, and finally, the feel of warm skin overcomes the lingering fear.
It’s the last time they get to share this tenderness... And trust.
Caroline has seldom cried through all of this; there wasn’t the time and space with Echo and various other people in her head, but she feels her eyes sting now. If Bennett had ever understood that Caroline had left her behind to save her, would that make a difference? She’d still be dead. Maybe it’s that selfishness that Caroline has often been accused of, that she would want the truth to be known.
What an irony that Bennett died helping to put Caroline back together when there was nothing more left than a damaged imprint. With the hope to finally have her revenge, granted, but still. There’s always been an intensity.
“What do you want to do once we’ve done this?” Bennett asks as they lie together in a close embrace, trying to understand what has just happened. It’s a loaded question. Bennett has her path figured out for her, many awards in her future, with an income that her past bullies could only dream of.
Caroline... She’s not so sure. She wants to save Bennett from said bullies as long as she can. She wants to save the world. She wants to do everything.
“More of this,” she says, turning to Bennett and kissing her, running a hand down her side, her thigh and back up. For a little while, she’s successfully evaded the question.
Caroline has done pretty much everything, though it’s been nothing like she’d ever imagined. She didn’t manage to bring the world forward, to a kinder future, so sometimes it feels like nothing was gained, but that isn’t true. They stopped the world from burning.
She had her part in it, and so did Bennett. It’s been a long war, but they’ve stopped the enemy for future generations who will never know what they’ve been spared.
The Dollhouse sent Echo to ‘romantic engagement’ with women seven times, married her off to one. Caroline can access those memories if she wants to. With her, she also keeps the memories of the people they once were, Caroline Farrell and Bennett Halverson. Their connection, and the promise.
No one could make her forget that. Caroline gets up and continues to walk along the path they’d been going together, comes by the area where there used to be the table where they first met.
She can’t turn back time, take away her pain, or Bennett’s, the betrayal, perceived and real. She can only try to be her best. There’s a part of her that will always remember the vision they shared, and the passion that got them there. We won, she thinks stubbornly.
Next to her, Bennett is asleep. Caroline brushes a strand of hair away from her face, just for a moment thinking what if they simply forgot about the plan? Just go on with life as if they weren’t aware of hell about to break loose. She’s tempted. Then, she lets the thought go. It’s not just about them.
Having abandoned memory lane, Caroline sits back in her car, pulling out of the parking lot. She feels calm, and with that, she’s finally letting go of the guilt, too. It’s like after a long winter, there are finally the first signs of spring.