am i???

[pass_my_guitar]

i feel as though i am losing muh best friend...he got a new gurlfriend and now that he has i feel like i dont mean ne thing too him ne more im not jelous of what he has...i know it may come accross as that but thats not it at all...im happy if hes happy...i just dont want to lose muh best buddy just beacuse he has a gurl friend does that mean he has too stop talkin too me???i dont understand.he used too call me at night...there used to not be a night that went by that i didnt talk too him...i miss our late night conversations....i miss the way we used too be i miss...i miss him!!!he means the world too me and now i feel like i dont even have him ne more.i thought of him as muh best friend and now i dont even hear from him. i know that we cant be the way we used to because we have both moved on...but i love him soo much and i feel like were drifting apart...just beacuse we have both moved on from eachother doesnt mean that we cant be friends ne more...and it dosent mean that we cant talk ne more.i mean i still tell him whats going on in muh life and try too keep him posted but i have no idea whats goin on in his.i love him soo much...but i cant put muh self through this ne more i did it for blake but i cannot do it again for ryan...its just not healthy...i know that we will probly never be together again...and thats not what i want unless its what he wants but i do what muh buddy back...i want muh best buddy ryan back!!!

i miss u soo much!!!