(no subject)
so today i went snowboarding with steve and aly. i owe aly soooo much. THANK YOU ALY!!! I LOVE YOU FOREVER AND EVER. it'll be my turn for the next THREE times. i promise. *hint hint, wink wink*
i still hurt from wednesday and i didnt want to risk falling and hurting myself so after we were going all normal on all the other runs, aly and i decided we wanted to do switch, or learn switch, so we went on the bunny hills. it was so funny, the lift person was asking people if they had ever ridden on the lift before and was helping them. lol i felt silly being on those runs. but i learned switch and i got pretty alright at it. i tried going on a normal easy run *not the bunny hills* and i did ok. no falling :)
aly and i waltzed off the lifts a couple times. :) lol
you guys, christmas is in like 8 days. does anyone else feel like this year has gone by so exremely fast? nickel, sam and jessica lin have half of their freshman year to go. aly and i have 2/3rds the way to go. its so insane. i got so happy reading jessicas lj the other day...where she was talking about managing her house and cleaning and cooking and decorating and everything. im so excited to do that next year. i absolutely love that. the whole thing about being independent is so enticing to me. i love it when i get motivated and go crazy with cooking or cleaning the house. its so much fun and you always feel more proud of how it all is. I dont like being a human though sometimes because being human means we have to get old. i was talking to my mommy the other day and we were talking about how meg is gonna get her license. then i was like mom, im in college. i dont live at home anymore. and i wanted to cry. and she's like, ur telling me! i feel so old! i miss being tha ree and not having to worry about anything or wonder IF i'll get married and be happy and if i'll have kids, and if i do, if they'll be ok, and if they'll be happy and that i'll have a close relationship with them. Or if all my dreams will come true. it's all just so complicated and scary and all by chance. is this really all a game? do we just have to learn how to play it?
im so seriously worried about finding a husband. i am so boy crazy all the time. but at the same time, i wish i would just settle down and i'd have a bf that i will marry later. i love the whole dating scene even though it can be so dramatized and silly. but since im so flirrty and insecure and untrustoworthy...how could a guy ever want to settle with me...will i ever find a guy i love so much that i wont ever want another guy? will i find him? i dont believe in soul mates...so i know there are lots of guys im completely compatible with, but im afraid i'll miss him, or them or whoever. what if im just so totally in my own world. OR even worse, what if i love him with all my heart and i could be so happy with him, but he doesnt love me back. what if who is good for me, and perfect for me, im not right for them? omg im gonna be single when im 50.
i cant talk about it all anymore. its gonna make me go crazy.
on a slighly sad note for me (haha), i havent talked to roy since wednesday. i still dont now if the decision that we are just friends was mine or his or mutual. i definitely dont remember the night i asked him about it and he didnt go into much detail the next day when he told me that is what we decided. and when i said oh well that is good, he's like yeah i guess. what does that mean! and then...i dunno. i dont want a bf sometimes, and i know he woudlnt be that good for me...but i dunno. i guess i do have a crush on him and so i'd like to hear from him u know? i dont want to seem like the clingy type so i refuse to call him.
ugh my nose is REALLY sunburnt. :( that means its gonna peel. err that sucks. tomorrow is our family friends daughters 2nd bday. my mom bought her this giraffe animal that you sit on. it holds up to 130 lbs weight. its got this nice metal frame...its so cool! i sat on it for a bit. grady likes it...he keeps wanting to chew it.
btw, grady is SO CUTE. omg...so cute. i love that thing to death. but he's so damn hyper now! what the HELL happened to the calm little thing we picked out and had for like 2 weeks?? okay well i have to go to bed. its like 12:18:34am so i need to pass out.
go bush, save the hubble, teach chimps sign language, save a horse, ride a cowboy/surfer!
i still hurt from wednesday and i didnt want to risk falling and hurting myself so after we were going all normal on all the other runs, aly and i decided we wanted to do switch, or learn switch, so we went on the bunny hills. it was so funny, the lift person was asking people if they had ever ridden on the lift before and was helping them. lol i felt silly being on those runs. but i learned switch and i got pretty alright at it. i tried going on a normal easy run *not the bunny hills* and i did ok. no falling :)
aly and i waltzed off the lifts a couple times. :) lol
you guys, christmas is in like 8 days. does anyone else feel like this year has gone by so exremely fast? nickel, sam and jessica lin have half of their freshman year to go. aly and i have 2/3rds the way to go. its so insane. i got so happy reading jessicas lj the other day...where she was talking about managing her house and cleaning and cooking and decorating and everything. im so excited to do that next year. i absolutely love that. the whole thing about being independent is so enticing to me. i love it when i get motivated and go crazy with cooking or cleaning the house. its so much fun and you always feel more proud of how it all is. I dont like being a human though sometimes because being human means we have to get old. i was talking to my mommy the other day and we were talking about how meg is gonna get her license. then i was like mom, im in college. i dont live at home anymore. and i wanted to cry. and she's like, ur telling me! i feel so old! i miss being tha ree and not having to worry about anything or wonder IF i'll get married and be happy and if i'll have kids, and if i do, if they'll be ok, and if they'll be happy and that i'll have a close relationship with them. Or if all my dreams will come true. it's all just so complicated and scary and all by chance. is this really all a game? do we just have to learn how to play it?
im so seriously worried about finding a husband. i am so boy crazy all the time. but at the same time, i wish i would just settle down and i'd have a bf that i will marry later. i love the whole dating scene even though it can be so dramatized and silly. but since im so flirrty and insecure and untrustoworthy...how could a guy ever want to settle with me...will i ever find a guy i love so much that i wont ever want another guy? will i find him? i dont believe in soul mates...so i know there are lots of guys im completely compatible with, but im afraid i'll miss him, or them or whoever. what if im just so totally in my own world. OR even worse, what if i love him with all my heart and i could be so happy with him, but he doesnt love me back. what if who is good for me, and perfect for me, im not right for them? omg im gonna be single when im 50.
i cant talk about it all anymore. its gonna make me go crazy.
on a slighly sad note for me (haha), i havent talked to roy since wednesday. i still dont now if the decision that we are just friends was mine or his or mutual. i definitely dont remember the night i asked him about it and he didnt go into much detail the next day when he told me that is what we decided. and when i said oh well that is good, he's like yeah i guess. what does that mean! and then...i dunno. i dont want a bf sometimes, and i know he woudlnt be that good for me...but i dunno. i guess i do have a crush on him and so i'd like to hear from him u know? i dont want to seem like the clingy type so i refuse to call him.
ugh my nose is REALLY sunburnt. :( that means its gonna peel. err that sucks. tomorrow is our family friends daughters 2nd bday. my mom bought her this giraffe animal that you sit on. it holds up to 130 lbs weight. its got this nice metal frame...its so cool! i sat on it for a bit. grady likes it...he keeps wanting to chew it.
btw, grady is SO CUTE. omg...so cute. i love that thing to death. but he's so damn hyper now! what the HELL happened to the calm little thing we picked out and had for like 2 weeks?? okay well i have to go to bed. its like 12:18:34am so i need to pass out.
go bush, save the hubble, teach chimps sign language, save a horse, ride a cowboy/surfer!