From everything I read, I was expecting the after care to be a lot more involved than it was for us. My husband had surgery almost three years ago, and being prepared, mostly from ideas in this community, made the process a lot easier.
My husband is a carpenter and he goes stir crazy so easily. I think his difficulty in staying still and wanting to do things was the hardest part. Cabin fever set in quickly.
I cared for him the first four or five days. His surgery was on a Friday, and then I cared for him through Monday.
The first day or so it was pretty easy because he wasn't feeling like he wanted to be up and about. I made his meals, cut his meat, etc. Straws were a big helper, because he could hold his own drink without raising his arms to actually drink. He needed help in going to the bathroom. No water could be let in around the chest area, so I gave him a sponge bath every other day or so.
Taking care of the drains was also a lot easier than expected. I just followed the instructions from the nurse, and they were removed about 10 days after the surgery. I just needed to empty them and record the fluid amount. It didn't hurt him at all, and actually, he said it felt better when they had been emptied and restarted.
After a handful of days, he was able to go to the bathroom alone and do basic things. He didn't really stress his arm area a lot or lift anything heavy. His surgeon said nothing over 15 pounds for the first 3 weeks, and nothing over 25 pounds for 6 more weeks after that. Again, my husband is a carpenter, so his physical load is a lot more than the average joe. I can say that our black lab did bump him "the wrong way" after about 5 weeks, and it caused some tenderness, so I think that a squirming toddler will be a bit much for awhile.
Here are some of the things I found helpful:
1. Straws 2. A lot of magazines, books, and videos 3. Bring a pillow to put between his chest and the seatbelt for the ride home. 4. When you leave the house, put things he may need at counter level, such as snack items, bowls, plates, etc. That way he isn't reaching. 5. The first night, I slept on the couch, so as not to bump him or accidentally hurt him while sleeping. 6. Take advantage of having friends or family he wants to see coming over so you can have a break. Take this time to go for a walk, clear your head, etc. Walking the dog during that time was a great escape from the caregiving.
That's all I can think of off th top of my head. Having a great support network will be a great help. Good luck, and make sure to come back with any questions.
On another note, I know the "are we there yet" feeling. We're no longer in our young 20s, too, and are often in that straight-seeming bunch, and there's just so much you can take. It wears me thin from time to time, as well. Seeing Adam go through surgery helped a lot. He felt "finally" there and he blossomed so much as a person. I hope you have that same experience. He felt so much more free and relaxed and it was wonderful.
Thank you for both the logistical suggestions and the hopeful words! You folks have a really positive space here.
I never thought of the straws or the pillow. Adding those to the travel list! Did I mention that we're taking the family, plus my mom and our best friends, to DC for this ordeal?
Oh, BTW, your wedding pics are gorgeous! Mazal tov, belatedly.
From everything I read, I was expecting the after care to be a lot more involved than it was for us. My husband had surgery almost three years ago, and being prepared, mostly from ideas in this community, made the process a lot easier.
My husband is a carpenter and he goes stir crazy so easily. I think his difficulty in staying still and wanting to do things was the hardest part. Cabin fever set in quickly.
I cared for him the first four or five days. His surgery was on a Friday, and then I cared for him through Monday.
The first day or so it was pretty easy because he wasn't feeling like he wanted to be up and about. I made his meals, cut his meat, etc. Straws were a big helper, because he could hold his own drink without raising his arms to actually drink. He needed help in going to the bathroom. No water could be let in around the chest area, so I gave him a sponge bath every other day or so.
Taking care of the drains was also a lot easier than expected. I just followed the instructions from the nurse, and they were removed about 10 days after the surgery. I just needed to empty them and record the fluid amount. It didn't hurt him at all, and actually, he said it felt better when they had been emptied and restarted.
After a handful of days, he was able to go to the bathroom alone and do basic things. He didn't really stress his arm area a lot or lift anything heavy. His surgeon said nothing over 15 pounds for the first 3 weeks, and nothing over 25 pounds for 6 more weeks after that. Again, my husband is a carpenter, so his physical load is a lot more than the average joe. I can say that our black lab did bump him "the wrong way" after about 5 weeks, and it caused some tenderness, so I think that a squirming toddler will be a bit much for awhile.
Here are some of the things I found helpful:
1. Straws
2. A lot of magazines, books, and videos
3. Bring a pillow to put between his chest and the seatbelt for the ride home.
4. When you leave the house, put things he may need at counter level, such as snack items, bowls, plates, etc. That way he isn't reaching.
5. The first night, I slept on the couch, so as not to bump him or accidentally hurt him while sleeping.
6. Take advantage of having friends or family he wants to see coming over so you can have a break. Take this time to go for a walk, clear your head, etc. Walking the dog during that time was a great escape from the caregiving.
That's all I can think of off th top of my head. Having a great support network will be a great help. Good luck, and make sure to come back with any questions.
On another note, I know the "are we there yet" feeling. We're no longer in our young 20s, too, and are often in that straight-seeming bunch, and there's just so much you can take. It wears me thin from time to time, as well. Seeing Adam go through surgery helped a lot. He felt "finally" there and he blossomed so much as a person. I hope you have that same experience. He felt so much more free and relaxed and it was wonderful.
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I never thought of the straws or the pillow. Adding those to the travel list! Did I mention that we're taking the family, plus my mom and our best friends, to DC for this ordeal?
Oh, BTW, your wedding pics are gorgeous! Mazal tov, belatedly.
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