WHY CAN'T YOU LOOK ME IN THE EYES AND TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT TO, I KNOW YOU WANT TO.
no matter what i do, i can never do anything right. as soon as something or everything gets on the right track. i have to go and fuck it up again...
sunday, was cool. i went to kenny's and then to his hockey game.
yesturday, the dreaded day. not only did i make one of the biggest mistakes of my life, not only was that the day i became a disappointment, and not only was that the day that i felt like i treated the only person i care about more than life itself like shit, it was the day that i realized, that i need to change and i am a horrible person and no matter how much i think things are going oh-kay, they're not. nothings oh-kay. everythings a mess. and it's all my fault because once again i had to turn into emily the super bitch and the most uncaring person to ever walk on the face of the earth. so yeah i went to school. how gay. then i went to tops, home depot, and BK with kenny and then back to his house...
today. well, yeah. i feel even worse than i did yesturday. and i would just like to know why like everytime i turn around someone else is telling me how this person hates me and that person hates me and im sick of hearing about how all these people don't like me when i havent even said one thing to them. all these people do is talk shit, i haven't even said one word back...
anyways. today is basically horrible. i'm a mess. falling apart. ugh, and this is like the only place i can actually talk about it because the only person i can talk to about my problems and stuff, well yeah i fucked that up. and then most of my friends..wait! what friends?
* so much reminds me of you, and i miss your smile *
i just wish things would go oh-kay for once because i am so sick of everything being so shitty. i mean hey, ive been pretending for weeks that everythings oh-kay and i've been sucking all this shit up and carrying on everyday with a smile, but i just can't take this anymore.
someone leave me some kind of love please.?
BUT IVE SEEN THIS ALL BEFORE, THINGS SHOULDN'T HAVE GONE THIS FAR.
sunday, was cool. i went to kenny's and then to his hockey game.
yesturday, the dreaded day. not only did i make one of the biggest mistakes of my life, not only was that the day i became a disappointment, and not only was that the day that i felt like i treated the only person i care about more than life itself like shit, it was the day that i realized, that i need to change and i am a horrible person and no matter how much i think things are going oh-kay, they're not. nothings oh-kay. everythings a mess. and it's all my fault because once again i had to turn into emily the super bitch and the most uncaring person to ever walk on the face of the earth. so yeah i went to school. how gay. then i went to tops, home depot, and BK with kenny and then back to his house...
today. well, yeah. i feel even worse than i did yesturday. and i would just like to know why like everytime i turn around someone else is telling me how this person hates me and that person hates me and im sick of hearing about how all these people don't like me when i havent even said one thing to them. all these people do is talk shit, i haven't even said one word back...
anyways. today is basically horrible. i'm a mess. falling apart. ugh, and this is like the only place i can actually talk about it because the only person i can talk to about my problems and stuff, well yeah i fucked that up. and then most of my friends..wait! what friends?
* so much reminds me of you, and i miss your smile *
i just wish things would go oh-kay for once because i am so sick of everything being so shitty. i mean hey, ive been pretending for weeks that everythings oh-kay and i've been sucking all this shit up and carrying on everyday with a smile, but i just can't take this anymore.
someone leave me some kind of love please.?
BUT IVE SEEN THIS ALL BEFORE, THINGS SHOULDN'T HAVE GONE THIS FAR.