cause i'm right here in your arms today
I'm sure most of you read PostSecret, right?
So, this week there was this -
- and it got me to thinking about porn.
As you may (not) know, the last boy liked amateur porn. And okay, that makes it sound like he had a problem. But you know how certain things turn certain people's cranks? Amateur porn was one of those things for him.
But every time I tried to watch any of it, I'd just, like, cringe. The bad lighting! The awkward fumbling! The forced 'ohh, baby, that's so good' expressions! The really horrible money shot groaning!
I just. Blurgh. Not my thing, but I could never really articulate why. And we got into several rather hilarious discussions of him basically saying, 'But, dude, ALL porn is bad! So what is your deal?' and me going, 'I don't know but holy hell, put that shit away!'
But when I saw this postcard, I had an epiphany as to why. Possibly because my reaction to porn is kind-of the polar opposite of this lady's.
Sex is kinda awkward, right? The weird moves, the funny expressions, the fumbling the first couple of times you're with someone. Very few people look good having sex. When you're actually the one doing it, it doesn't matter what you look like, what the other person looks like - you're having too much fun to care.
But when I'm watching it, I don't want to see that.
I want someone who knows what they're doing. Someone who's conscious of moving a certain way or holding themselves a certain way; someone who knows (most times, at least) what looks good. Someone who gets paid to have sex for a reason.
I mean, let's be honest for a moment - the only reason to actually watch porn is to get off. And getting off is the last thing on my mind when I'm distracted by the bad music from the boom box and actually having to concentrate on what exactly is going on and my own special phobia of 'ohgod, do I know that person?'
In short - I want professionals, damn it.
So, this week there was this -
- and it got me to thinking about porn.
As you may (not) know, the last boy liked amateur porn. And okay, that makes it sound like he had a problem. But you know how certain things turn certain people's cranks? Amateur porn was one of those things for him.
But every time I tried to watch any of it, I'd just, like, cringe. The bad lighting! The awkward fumbling! The forced 'ohh, baby, that's so good' expressions! The really horrible money shot groaning!
I just. Blurgh. Not my thing, but I could never really articulate why. And we got into several rather hilarious discussions of him basically saying, 'But, dude, ALL porn is bad! So what is your deal?' and me going, 'I don't know but holy hell, put that shit away!'
But when I saw this postcard, I had an epiphany as to why. Possibly because my reaction to porn is kind-of the polar opposite of this lady's.
Sex is kinda awkward, right? The weird moves, the funny expressions, the fumbling the first couple of times you're with someone. Very few people look good having sex. When you're actually the one doing it, it doesn't matter what you look like, what the other person looks like - you're having too much fun to care.
But when I'm watching it, I don't want to see that.
I want someone who knows what they're doing. Someone who's conscious of moving a certain way or holding themselves a certain way; someone who knows (most times, at least) what looks good. Someone who gets paid to have sex for a reason.
I mean, let's be honest for a moment - the only reason to actually watch porn is to get off. And getting off is the last thing on my mind when I'm distracted by the bad music from the boom box and actually having to concentrate on what exactly is going on and my own special phobia of 'ohgod, do I know that person?'
In short - I want professionals, damn it.