(no subject)
I feel really alone tonight, no matter what people say or do to me tonight, I just feel alone.
I want to cry but the tears wont flow, I want to sleep but I am not tired, I want to eat and lose weight at the same time. I want it all to just go ALITTLE right for mor than one night, or 2 hours. I so badly wanted that phone call, just because it was some reassurance that I am not the person that everyone first thinks of me as. Reassurace that this WONT happen to me EVERY time. I just need to get used to it. From now on nothing can get me really excited. I am going on in life with a blank face, its the only way to keep myself sane.
~jen~
I want to cry but the tears wont flow, I want to sleep but I am not tired, I want to eat and lose weight at the same time. I want it all to just go ALITTLE right for mor than one night, or 2 hours. I so badly wanted that phone call, just because it was some reassurance that I am not the person that everyone first thinks of me as. Reassurace that this WONT happen to me EVERY time. I just need to get used to it. From now on nothing can get me really excited. I am going on in life with a blank face, its the only way to keep myself sane.
~jen~