(no subject)
winter days seem so much longer and that sucks. the cold and ice make me pouty & just wanna get lost in my bed somewhere.. things are changing alot all over again & i think im moving out of my place and in with my moms.. maybe. depends..if i do, i get a regular shower&bathtub again<3 with my own washer&dryer! yayy. id get my own room w/bathroom n a cute lil deck on the roof..oh! and a bunny.but what happens when i want lots of ppl over or a boy? or whats gonna happen when i come home at 5am stoned? what thennnnn.! ive been lookng at colleges online alll dayyy. my brains gonna throw up. ive lost touch with alot of my best friends & the ones i have left say that we've drifted...&its probably my fault. i feel like im so lonley all the time but once i have someone around i get sick of them and want to be alone all over again.. im sick of doing nothing and extra sick of not working.the boy i was seeing, or am seeing? i dont even know whats going on with that but its going no where and im getting bored with it,i havent seen him really & everythings just..dead. like theres no emotions behind anything. and it hurts cos it feels like im waisting time.last night my mom and i drove to delaware and i picked up all of my "memories" i left behind when i went to spain..just pictures,drawings, letters and stuff..i havent gone through it all yet, ive been staying at my moms for the past 4540754 dayss. maybe im just home sick. someone come over & ill make you dinner and we can watch moviess and paint our nails haha....whatevs. highlight of my day tho? anita<3