I'm a little scared...
I'm thinking more and more about graduate school (a consequence of being on break) and how competitive it really is to be accepted. I have by no means had an ideal college career which is showing in my GPA. I started out in a major that wasn't for me, changed to one that suited me but I am still nowhere near where a happy ending. I know that I want to study clinical psychology but you apparently have to be near brilliant (according to GPA and GRE scores) to even be considered for a program. Even more than that you have to have a certain degree of conformity to what is currently accepted in the field and I don't think that fits what I was looking for but time will tell. I have not yet settled on a particular research interest which may not go over well with a graduate interviewer (because we all know that everyone going to graduate school only intends to sit in an ivory tower of some sort for the rest of their lives, never experiencing the rest of the world). When I do settle on an interest, I have a feeling it will be in some area of research that is either completely new or rapidly changing, requiring the kind of mind that I don't believe I have.
Perhaps I've just been misinformed about the nature of graduate school or my knowledge is extremely limited in how the whole process works. I've talked with friends of mine, both undergrad and grad students to try and alleviate some of the stress I'm feeling. Their words are comforting for a moment until I realize that these people are highly favored for their outstanding intellect and their definition of subpar is probably my definition of average. Between the counterbalancing of stereotype threat and halo effects I find myself in a tough spot :-\. Will I be able to convince grad schools that I'm not ignorant but rather have a different experience? Will that be good enough to get them interested in what I could potentially offer to a program? If they accept me (and I pray that at least one of them does) will I be able to fit in there and grow into a respectable professional?
Perhaps I've just been misinformed about the nature of graduate school or my knowledge is extremely limited in how the whole process works. I've talked with friends of mine, both undergrad and grad students to try and alleviate some of the stress I'm feeling. Their words are comforting for a moment until I realize that these people are highly favored for their outstanding intellect and their definition of subpar is probably my definition of average. Between the counterbalancing of stereotype threat and halo effects I find myself in a tough spot :-\. Will I be able to convince grad schools that I'm not ignorant but rather have a different experience? Will that be good enough to get them interested in what I could potentially offer to a program? If they accept me (and I pray that at least one of them does) will I be able to fit in there and grow into a respectable professional?