136; to make up for earlier mistakes~

[paralinguistic]

This was on my flist, and I've never done this one before ever. As I also cocked up earlier with the anonymous meme, I thought I'd do this one instead, since this one's far nicer and doesn't revolve around me.

Leave me an anonymous comment pouring your heart out. Say anything. Tell me your stories, your secrets, those things no one ever asks but

Comments

[anonymous]

No, I don't think you're rubbing in at all. I've had the wonderful relationships, and then, for whatever reason, I became afraid, and then I backed away. And I regret it, I always do, because I see the relationships I used to have, and I miss those people horribly. The worst part is, that I did it to myself. However, I've also been in the same position as you, where the effort I used to put into friendships has been inversely proportional to what I got out. It's so exhausting, isn't it? Disheartening too.

I don't mean to say you're not worthy of trust. More that... trust in general frightens me. I want to trust people, but just find it difficult to open myself up to people, because when you lay yourself emotionally bare to someone, anyone, it's terrifying and thrilling at the same time, because you've finally taken that plunge and trusted them - really trusted them. But there's always that nagging worry that don't really care about that leap you've taken, and don't care about the trust you've put into them. And that's when things go badly. So it's not that I believe you're untrustworthy, it's that I'm terrified of taking that leap and finding out the hard way you might not care about the trust I want to put in you.

[paralinguistic]

I care. ♥ Absolutely.