On living alone, and being alone
Somedays, I really hate it.
Am still trying to learn to do this, and it just isn't easy sometimes. Even with the dogs, it isn't easy. Even on Wellbutrin, it isn't easy. It's lonely as hell at times. My favorite companion lives in another country. I miss my kids living here but I kept them as long as I could - they had to leave eventually. I miss my mom. I keep hearing 'this is it, kid, this is your life, get used to it' but I don't really like that voice in my head very much.
I can see why some people have lots of pets, or go out and spend a lot of money they don't need to be spending, or eat when they shouldn't because at least it gets your mind off being alone in a house and no one thinking about you.
Yes, I am having THAT kind of day, where taking a nice long nap seems more attractive than anything.
I have great friends, I have great family, I have a fantastic job I enjoy, I do things a couple of times a week, but sometimes? Just not enough.
Generally I love my house to myself, and my solo time - time that when I was married way back when, would kill for. But sometimes having something in abundance is just too much.
I'll get over this mood, I always do. But in the meantime, it just really sucks.
Am still trying to learn to do this, and it just isn't easy sometimes. Even with the dogs, it isn't easy. Even on Wellbutrin, it isn't easy. It's lonely as hell at times. My favorite companion lives in another country. I miss my kids living here but I kept them as long as I could - they had to leave eventually. I miss my mom. I keep hearing 'this is it, kid, this is your life, get used to it' but I don't really like that voice in my head very much.
I can see why some people have lots of pets, or go out and spend a lot of money they don't need to be spending, or eat when they shouldn't because at least it gets your mind off being alone in a house and no one thinking about you.
Yes, I am having THAT kind of day, where taking a nice long nap seems more attractive than anything.
I have great friends, I have great family, I have a fantastic job I enjoy, I do things a couple of times a week, but sometimes? Just not enough.
Generally I love my house to myself, and my solo time - time that when I was married way back when, would kill for. But sometimes having something in abundance is just too much.
I'll get over this mood, I always do. But in the meantime, it just really sucks.