Forever Yours: A Juca fic.
*Based on the FGB characters Jess and Luca.
A/N: This is a Christmas gift for Bonnie from me, on behalf of the rest of the guides. It's mainly from Jess's POV, since she is my character, and writing Luca dialogue was way harder than I expected (sorry if I got it wrong, BonBon!) For many reasons, this is a scene that could never happen, so I'm posting it here instead :). Enjoy!
Well find a way to be together
However long it takes, wherever
If it means having you for only a moment
A moment just might be enough...
Jess stared at the Christmas tree in front of her as she sat on the edge of the couch. The hot cocoa in her hand was now luke warm, and still full, but she barely noticed or cared. How could she care? It was just a drink, and not one that she enjoyed nearly as much as she used to. The christmas lights mixed in with ornaments in a big blur as her eyes filled with water. She was alone this Christmas.
Yes, her coven had a small dinner together, complete with a secret santa exchange. But with only a few minutes until midnight, she was the only one awake that Christmas eve. She couldn't seem to sleep, only it wasn't like when she was a child, eagerly awaiting Christmas morning, or hoping to catch a glimpse at Santa Claus. Instead she couldn't seem to stop focusing on one Christmas ornament. Jess bought it the previous year for her and Luca. Their first ornament together. [i]And our last.[/i] She thought bitterly.
Being a widow was nowhere on her agenda, and certainly not something she expected to be facing so soon. Luca's death was something that she was still struggling to accept, and something that no one else she knew could empathize with. Yes, many people had experienced death. But losing a spouse was different, she was beginning to realize. Nothing made her feel better. When her parents died, Luca eventually healed that wound. What could possibly heal the wound that Luca's death formed?
She wished their lives ended up differently. What if they weren't magical? What if they met some other way, and were able to live full and happy lives as normal humans? What if they were able to die together in a nursing home, holding hands as they sat in bed, with their fake teeth in a cup on the bedside table. It was a silly image, but one that was better than this one. They would have been happy, she knew it.
With a resigned sigh, she got to her feet, and turned off the lights as the clock struck twelve. The moonlight illuminated her way to the stairwell, as she headed off to bed. She wished she could have slept through Christmas, and the rest of the holidays. They seemed to be too painful to face, and she was dreading having to do just that. All she had was Bobby on that Christmas, and while it was good she had someone, it would have been nice to have her husband as well. Just for one day.
“Jess.”
A soft gasp escaped her lips as she dropped her mug, letting it shatter on the floor. The voice sounded so clear, it was as if it came from right behind her. But it wasn’t possible, it couldn’t be. Perhaps she had stooped down to full blown hallucinations. That was the only reason that she could have heard his voice so perfectly clear. But even so, why did her heart beat a little faster? Why did she feel that other presence in the room?
“Turn around.” The voice commanded, and she did.
Luca stood next to the Christmas tree, as if nothing had happened. As if he never died. There wasn’t even a ghostly glow surrounding him. He was exactly like she remembered, even down to the small smile curling his lips. His brown eyes seemed to glisten in the moonlight, and the sight of him made it impossible for her to breathe. How insane had she become? Now, she was seeing him wandering the house. Though if she was losing her mind, she didn’t mind doing so in this way. Seeing Luca was worth the loss of sanity.
“Either I’m dreaming, or losing my mind.” She had to be dreaming! She had dreamt of Luca before. While it was never this vivid, it certainly wasn’t the first time she had seen him in her head. It was silly to have gotten her hopes so high. Clearly, this wasn’t him. It couldn’t be.
“Neither.” Luca told her, walking across the living room to the stairwell she stood on, frozen in shock. “I’m only here for the day, but they sent me back.” He told her with that familiar grin. “The Powers That Be, so to speak, figured you deserved a proper Christmas present after everything that happened these past few months.” His eyes drifted down to her necklace, where their wedding bands sat. Reaching up, he took them in his hands, and to her shock they didn’t pass through. “Flesh and blood for twenty-four hours.” The sadness was as clear in his voice as it had been in his eyes. “It’s not forever, but it’s something.”
For a moment, Jess couldn’t speak or move. Every thing about him wasn’t as good as she remembered. It was better. A million times better. Her last memory had been him dead in the ruins of Micah’s coven house. Did her and Luca finally have a chance to say their goodbyes? To make things end the way she would have wanted to? When he died, she was plagued with the guilt of how things were left with them, but now she could have the perfect final memories of him.
Her hand reached up to his hand that held the rings, and she was surprised with how warm he felt. So much different from the last time. That same hand reached up to gently touch Jess’s cheek, and she closed her eyes, letting the tears trickle out. “Luca…” She breathed, opening her eyes once more to see him. And for the first time in a long time, she offered a genuine smile, which he instantly matched. His thumb wiped away the tears, and she realized that Luca was the only thing that could truly get rid of those tears.
He moved closer, and placed his lips on hers, and the feeling was just as she remembered it. Her heart seemed to soar as he wrapped his arms around her. Her mind drifted to each kiss they shared while he was alive, from the first one on the Twilight coven house balcony, to their first one as husband and wife. None of them seemed to compare. She pulled him closely, never wanting to let him go, and not intending to for the rest of the day.
The Florida sun warmed her face as she woke up that Christmas morning. With a sinking heart, she realized that Luca wasn’t in the room. It was all a dream… She sadly thought. It had certainly felt real, but she knew she wouldn’t have fallen asleep. The last thing she remembered was lying in Luca’s arms, but come to think of it, she was struggling to stay awake.
Not to mention the only thing covering her was her bedsheets.
She hadn’t woken up naked since Luca died, which seemed to mean something. Her memory of the dream wasn’t fading like it usually did either. Every detail was still as vivid as if it were real life. It couldn’t have been, though. Right?
When Luca opened the bedroom door with one hand, carrying a tray of breakfast with the other, she realized just how wrong she was. Sitting up, she pulled her sheet up to cover herself. “Good morning.” He greeted her, just like he did when he was still alive. Though the evidence was clear, and it wasn’t a dream, it certainly didn’t feel real.
“It certainly is.” Was all she could reply as he carefully put the tray on the bedside table. It was funny how even in death, he was fearful of a spill. Jess, on the other hand, wasn’t afraid. She felt nothing but happiness, and she focused on the feeling, because she knew it wouldn’t last. She wanted to savor every moment. “I can’t believe you let me sleep.” She told him, though to be honest, it was the first time in a long time she had woken up feeling refreshed after such a good nights sleep.
Luca turned his attention back to the Jess, and crawled on with her, gently pushing her back on the bed as he placed another toe curling kiss on her lips. Wrapping her arms around him, she memorized every detail. The way his hands gently cupped her face. The way she could feel his smile as they kissed. It was strange the little things she missed. He broke the kiss, and his brown gaze met her blue. “Do you even know how much I missed sleeping with you? In the literal sense?”
His question wasn't really one she thought of, but now that he mentioned it, it made sense. It was such a small detail in the grand scheme of things, but it was one she treasured more than she realized. But it didn't change the fact that they only had twenty-four hours together. “I know, and believe me, I did too.” She said, as she started to sit up. “But there's so much we have to... Oh my God! It's noon?!?” She asked as soon as she looked at the clock, and looked back to Luca in distress.
He only shrugged, as if that fact was hardly important. “If it makes you feel any better, I've only been up since nine.”
“You've been awake for three hours?!?” She asked, panicked. “Luca, half the day is gone! There's so much we have to do!” Jess got to her feet, and quickly started to put some clothes on. He was only going to be with her for 12 hours, and she was desperate to make it perfect. There was so much he hadn't done when he was alive, and she was sure he wanted make up for that lost time. If he wasn't ever going to come back after that day, than she wanted him to have his last day be the best one.
“Like...?” He asked with a tone that questioned her sanity. Little did he know that most of it left when he died.
“Well,” She started, pondering the millions of things they could see and do. “I don't even know! There's so many things you haven’t seen, so much you won't be able to see.” After pulling on her shirt, she made her way over to the bed, and sat down next to him. “We have twelve hours together. We need to make them count, don't we?”
Luca's lips curled into an amused smirk, as he looked down. “Jess...” The one word was enough to send her heart soaring. “Don't you realize that it already counts? All I want is to be with you. All that other stuff... I don't miss it. It's you I miss.”
Her cheeks flushed slightly at his words, not really thinking of it that way. She was sure he would have many things he regretted missing, but it seemed that the only thing he regretted was not being with her. “So, you just want to stay here?” She asked, wanting to be sure. Some how, she didn't feel worth it. Why would he want to spend his last day with her? But when he responded by closing the distance between them with a simple kiss, she quickly realized the answer. Duh, he loves you. Jess told herself.
He pulled away, and picked up the plate from the table they sat beside. “Have some breakfast.” Luca told her, handing her the plate of eggs and bacon on toast: his specialty. The sight of it made her stomach rumble with the realization that she really was hungry. Without hesitation, she took a bite, and savored the simple meal. After all, no matter how many times she would have it in the future, it would never taste like Luca's.
Noticing that he didn't have a plate, she frowned slightly. “Aren't you going to eat?”
“I'm not hungry.” He replied with a shrug. “I also don't seem to have my powers, for some reason. I guess this really is a temporary thing.”
Jess couldn't imagine not having her powers, even in a situation like this. But she had what she wanted, which was him. Not his powers, not his appetite. Just Luca. His powers never were who he was.
Figuring they needed a happier topic, she joked. “Well, you already have power over me. That should be enough.”
“It will have to be.” He told her with a small smile, leaning back on the pillow as she continued to eat. “By the way, did you not learn anything from me? The kitchen was almost as messy as your bedroom.”
“Which you managed to clean quietly, I noticed.” She said, motioning to the clear floor. There used to be papers, clothes, empty food cartons and chip bags, but now it was bare. Wasn't her carpet supposed to be white? She would have to vacuum it later. “Thank you.” She couldn't think of a time that it had been clean since he died, which was something she was going to have to learn to deal with. “What else did you do while I was asleep?”
He let out a huff of laughter, trying to think of an answer for her. “Lived, breathed, existed. I did see Bobby, though. She's not handling everything well.”
“And I'm sure seeing you didn't help matters.” She told him, wishing she knew what she could do for her. But how could she possibly comfort someone when she was just as much of a mess over the same situation? If she didn't have the answers for herself, she would never have the answers for Bobby.
“I told her that she was strong, and that if anyone could get through this, than it was her.” Jess nodded at Luca's statement, knowing it was true. She had come to rely on Bobby over those past few months, and for Jess to rely on someone other than Luca was saying something about the teenager. Though Bobby didn't see it, Jess was confident that she would be able to come out of this stronger.
“Losing you is probably the hardest thing for her to face, though.” She told him, as she set aside her plate, and curled back up to where she belonged, and right back in his arms.
Luca brushed back some of her hair, and kissed the top of her head. “I'm nothing important.” He told her softly. His words made her let out a frustrated sigh. There was nothing true in them, and if anything bothered her more, it was hearing lies. She sat up, and adjusted herself so she was sitting on his lap, and looking into his eyes.
“Luca,” She started. “You know I hate it when you lie.” Before he could speak, she sealed his lips in a kiss.
The rest of the afternoon was simple. They only needed to be with each other, and Jess was realizing that on that Christmas, she and Luca would finally be able to have that final day they wanted, and the day she regretted they didn't have. A day without fights and harsh words. They could focus on the parts of their relationship that had always worked, and would have eventually let everything else work itself out. Jess knew deep down that their break-up would only have been temporary, because living without him for those past few months had been the hardest thing she faced.
The hammock that they shared swayed gently from the ocean breeze as the sun slowly began to set. They hadn't spoken much since they got there, and they never really needed to. If there was one thing they enjoyed, it was the silent moments where they could be together. While Jess liked talking, nothing compared to simply lying next to each other, listening to each other breath, and hearing Luca's heartbeat against her ear.
The sun slowly sunk into the horizon, and her heart sunk with it. It was only a sign that the end of the day was coming soon. There was so much that hadn't been said yet, and she wondered if all of it would be said. Perhaps he already knew how she felt, but she wanted to say it. “I love you.” She said softly.
“I love you more.” He replied automatically, his gaze fixed on the ocean as his fingers gently laced themselves in her hair. She would have fought him on that claim, but fighting was the last thing she wanted to do. Instead, she reached up for her necklace, and took those wedding bands in her hand. Channeling her power of phasing, she made them pass through the chain of the necklace with ease, freeing them.
Her mind drifted to when she and Luca exchanged those rings on their wedding day. In that one moment, they had the whole future in front of them. But because of one man's selfishness and greed for power, it was all taken away. She reached for his left hand, and without a word, she placed his wedding band right where it belonged. After a moment, she quietly asked. “Are you mad at Alec for what he did?”
Luca could only stare at the ring with an odd mix of joy, sadness, and longing. He wished he could live the life they had mapped out for themselves, and make Jess happy. But at the same time, there was nothing he could do about it. Taking Jess's wedding band out of her hand, he placed hers on her ring finger, before holding that hand with his own. “He's not worth it.” He told her. “As much as I wish it didn't happen, he only feeds on anger. To show him that emotion would only make him happy.” He concluded, before kissing her head once more.
Jess pondered his words, thinking about all the heartbreak Alec had caused her. His evil deeds had gone on unpunished, but there never seemed to be a way to finally be rid of him. Him being trapped in an illusion that Noah, and the rest of the guides, put him in, it seemed to be the only thing that made her feel better. But only slightly. “It's not fair.” She told him, just like she had told her parents when she accidentally summoned them. “We deserved to be happy. We deserved a break.”
“I know.” He told her. “But we were happy. For just a while. There was never a guarantee on how long that would last.”
Jess kept her gaze on the ocean, pondering his words. In a way, he was right, but deep down, she wanted more. She had Luca for such a short time, and part of her wasn't ready to lose him.
Luca prepared an impromptu dinner for Jess and Bobby (making sure it was vegan, of course). It was a normal night, with no mention of death, or the short time Luca had there. Jess and Bobby were treasuring the gift they had with him being there, and no matter what happened, the day would be perfect. After dinner, they played a card game together, which Bobby managed to win by the skin of her teeth. Jess or Luca didn't mind, though. There were more important things in the world for them to worry about.
Jess memorized every detail of that last intimate moment together. The way he touched with more love than she could ever realize. The soft whispers she heard in her ear. The way he kissed her at just the right time. Things with the two of them simply clicked on their own. They knew each other better than anyone else ever could, and the love they shared made it all so much more than anything either of them experienced with anyone else.
Before Jess knew it, it was 11:50 PM.
They stared at each other, laying side by side. If there was a way for Luca to go, this was probably the best way. The day had been a whirlwind of joy, and one she would never forget. Just like she couldn't forget the last day of his life, she would never forget their last day together.
“There's something I need to tell you.” She said softly, before taking a deep breath. It had been a speech she had gone over in her head a million times, and now she would finally be able to tell him. “I never meant a word of what I told you that day. I couldn't imagine leaving you for long. I know I would have forgiven you eventually simply because I'm lost without you. I couldn't have chosen to live like this.” A tear trickled down her cheek, and her voice began to crack. Why did he have to go? Why did this have to be goodbye? She wished that there was a magical way to trick The Powers That Be, but even she knew nothing got past them.
Luca reached up and gently wiped away the tears that were slipping out. The look in his eyes was one of heartbreak over the sight of her devastation, and the knowledge that there was nothing either of them could do to stop it.
“I'm sorry about all the pain I caused you. While I was alive, and now.” He told her sadly. There was no way he could fix past regrets, no matter how much he wanted to. He wouldn't have the rest of her life to make up for it all, but he was sure going to try in the next few minutes. “All I wanted was to make you happy, but I don't think I did it right in the end.”
“I know.” She told him. “But, Luca, I was happy. I was more happy than you know. We all make mistakes, and I forgive you for yours.” They all seemed like small mistakes now, even if they weren't. Jess knew that she had every right to be mad at him before, but it didn't change the fact that she was able to forgive him.
“You truly are the most amazing woman I've ever met.” He said incredulously, just like he had when Jess first really fell in love with him in Tokyo. Somethings never changed, including how she felt about herself, but she didn't tell him that. “I love you.” He whispered one more time.
“I love you more.” She told him, before leaning forward the short distance so they could share their last kiss. It was the kiss she would hold in her heart for the rest of her life, and each time she thought of it, she would think of that perfect moment. For the first time, she was able to accept that death she feared for Luca. They were truly happy, which was the way both of them wanted it.
The clock hit the twelve o'clock mark, and Jess pulled away. Slowly, her husband faded away from view without a sound, leaving nothing in his wake but the wedding band that she had placed on his finger.
A/N: This is a Christmas gift for Bonnie from me, on behalf of the rest of the guides. It's mainly from Jess's POV, since she is my character, and writing Luca dialogue was way harder than I expected (sorry if I got it wrong, BonBon!) For many reasons, this is a scene that could never happen, so I'm posting it here instead :). Enjoy!
Well find a way to be together
However long it takes, wherever
If it means having you for only a moment
A moment just might be enough...
Jess stared at the Christmas tree in front of her as she sat on the edge of the couch. The hot cocoa in her hand was now luke warm, and still full, but she barely noticed or cared. How could she care? It was just a drink, and not one that she enjoyed nearly as much as she used to. The christmas lights mixed in with ornaments in a big blur as her eyes filled with water. She was alone this Christmas.
Yes, her coven had a small dinner together, complete with a secret santa exchange. But with only a few minutes until midnight, she was the only one awake that Christmas eve. She couldn't seem to sleep, only it wasn't like when she was a child, eagerly awaiting Christmas morning, or hoping to catch a glimpse at Santa Claus. Instead she couldn't seem to stop focusing on one Christmas ornament. Jess bought it the previous year for her and Luca. Their first ornament together. [i]And our last.[/i] She thought bitterly.
Being a widow was nowhere on her agenda, and certainly not something she expected to be facing so soon. Luca's death was something that she was still struggling to accept, and something that no one else she knew could empathize with. Yes, many people had experienced death. But losing a spouse was different, she was beginning to realize. Nothing made her feel better. When her parents died, Luca eventually healed that wound. What could possibly heal the wound that Luca's death formed?
She wished their lives ended up differently. What if they weren't magical? What if they met some other way, and were able to live full and happy lives as normal humans? What if they were able to die together in a nursing home, holding hands as they sat in bed, with their fake teeth in a cup on the bedside table. It was a silly image, but one that was better than this one. They would have been happy, she knew it.
With a resigned sigh, she got to her feet, and turned off the lights as the clock struck twelve. The moonlight illuminated her way to the stairwell, as she headed off to bed. She wished she could have slept through Christmas, and the rest of the holidays. They seemed to be too painful to face, and she was dreading having to do just that. All she had was Bobby on that Christmas, and while it was good she had someone, it would have been nice to have her husband as well. Just for one day.
“Jess.”
A soft gasp escaped her lips as she dropped her mug, letting it shatter on the floor. The voice sounded so clear, it was as if it came from right behind her. But it wasn’t possible, it couldn’t be. Perhaps she had stooped down to full blown hallucinations. That was the only reason that she could have heard his voice so perfectly clear. But even so, why did her heart beat a little faster? Why did she feel that other presence in the room?
“Turn around.” The voice commanded, and she did.
Luca stood next to the Christmas tree, as if nothing had happened. As if he never died. There wasn’t even a ghostly glow surrounding him. He was exactly like she remembered, even down to the small smile curling his lips. His brown eyes seemed to glisten in the moonlight, and the sight of him made it impossible for her to breathe. How insane had she become? Now, she was seeing him wandering the house. Though if she was losing her mind, she didn’t mind doing so in this way. Seeing Luca was worth the loss of sanity.
“Either I’m dreaming, or losing my mind.” She had to be dreaming! She had dreamt of Luca before. While it was never this vivid, it certainly wasn’t the first time she had seen him in her head. It was silly to have gotten her hopes so high. Clearly, this wasn’t him. It couldn’t be.
“Neither.” Luca told her, walking across the living room to the stairwell she stood on, frozen in shock. “I’m only here for the day, but they sent me back.” He told her with that familiar grin. “The Powers That Be, so to speak, figured you deserved a proper Christmas present after everything that happened these past few months.” His eyes drifted down to her necklace, where their wedding bands sat. Reaching up, he took them in his hands, and to her shock they didn’t pass through. “Flesh and blood for twenty-four hours.” The sadness was as clear in his voice as it had been in his eyes. “It’s not forever, but it’s something.”
For a moment, Jess couldn’t speak or move. Every thing about him wasn’t as good as she remembered. It was better. A million times better. Her last memory had been him dead in the ruins of Micah’s coven house. Did her and Luca finally have a chance to say their goodbyes? To make things end the way she would have wanted to? When he died, she was plagued with the guilt of how things were left with them, but now she could have the perfect final memories of him.
Her hand reached up to his hand that held the rings, and she was surprised with how warm he felt. So much different from the last time. That same hand reached up to gently touch Jess’s cheek, and she closed her eyes, letting the tears trickle out. “Luca…” She breathed, opening her eyes once more to see him. And for the first time in a long time, she offered a genuine smile, which he instantly matched. His thumb wiped away the tears, and she realized that Luca was the only thing that could truly get rid of those tears.
He moved closer, and placed his lips on hers, and the feeling was just as she remembered it. Her heart seemed to soar as he wrapped his arms around her. Her mind drifted to each kiss they shared while he was alive, from the first one on the Twilight coven house balcony, to their first one as husband and wife. None of them seemed to compare. She pulled him closely, never wanting to let him go, and not intending to for the rest of the day.
The Florida sun warmed her face as she woke up that Christmas morning. With a sinking heart, she realized that Luca wasn’t in the room. It was all a dream… She sadly thought. It had certainly felt real, but she knew she wouldn’t have fallen asleep. The last thing she remembered was lying in Luca’s arms, but come to think of it, she was struggling to stay awake.
Not to mention the only thing covering her was her bedsheets.
She hadn’t woken up naked since Luca died, which seemed to mean something. Her memory of the dream wasn’t fading like it usually did either. Every detail was still as vivid as if it were real life. It couldn’t have been, though. Right?
When Luca opened the bedroom door with one hand, carrying a tray of breakfast with the other, she realized just how wrong she was. Sitting up, she pulled her sheet up to cover herself. “Good morning.” He greeted her, just like he did when he was still alive. Though the evidence was clear, and it wasn’t a dream, it certainly didn’t feel real.
“It certainly is.” Was all she could reply as he carefully put the tray on the bedside table. It was funny how even in death, he was fearful of a spill. Jess, on the other hand, wasn’t afraid. She felt nothing but happiness, and she focused on the feeling, because she knew it wouldn’t last. She wanted to savor every moment. “I can’t believe you let me sleep.” She told him, though to be honest, it was the first time in a long time she had woken up feeling refreshed after such a good nights sleep.
Luca turned his attention back to the Jess, and crawled on with her, gently pushing her back on the bed as he placed another toe curling kiss on her lips. Wrapping her arms around him, she memorized every detail. The way his hands gently cupped her face. The way she could feel his smile as they kissed. It was strange the little things she missed. He broke the kiss, and his brown gaze met her blue. “Do you even know how much I missed sleeping with you? In the literal sense?”
His question wasn't really one she thought of, but now that he mentioned it, it made sense. It was such a small detail in the grand scheme of things, but it was one she treasured more than she realized. But it didn't change the fact that they only had twenty-four hours together. “I know, and believe me, I did too.” She said, as she started to sit up. “But there's so much we have to... Oh my God! It's noon?!?” She asked as soon as she looked at the clock, and looked back to Luca in distress.
He only shrugged, as if that fact was hardly important. “If it makes you feel any better, I've only been up since nine.”
“You've been awake for three hours?!?” She asked, panicked. “Luca, half the day is gone! There's so much we have to do!” Jess got to her feet, and quickly started to put some clothes on. He was only going to be with her for 12 hours, and she was desperate to make it perfect. There was so much he hadn't done when he was alive, and she was sure he wanted make up for that lost time. If he wasn't ever going to come back after that day, than she wanted him to have his last day be the best one.
“Like...?” He asked with a tone that questioned her sanity. Little did he know that most of it left when he died.
“Well,” She started, pondering the millions of things they could see and do. “I don't even know! There's so many things you haven’t seen, so much you won't be able to see.” After pulling on her shirt, she made her way over to the bed, and sat down next to him. “We have twelve hours together. We need to make them count, don't we?”
Luca's lips curled into an amused smirk, as he looked down. “Jess...” The one word was enough to send her heart soaring. “Don't you realize that it already counts? All I want is to be with you. All that other stuff... I don't miss it. It's you I miss.”
Her cheeks flushed slightly at his words, not really thinking of it that way. She was sure he would have many things he regretted missing, but it seemed that the only thing he regretted was not being with her. “So, you just want to stay here?” She asked, wanting to be sure. Some how, she didn't feel worth it. Why would he want to spend his last day with her? But when he responded by closing the distance between them with a simple kiss, she quickly realized the answer. Duh, he loves you. Jess told herself.
He pulled away, and picked up the plate from the table they sat beside. “Have some breakfast.” Luca told her, handing her the plate of eggs and bacon on toast: his specialty. The sight of it made her stomach rumble with the realization that she really was hungry. Without hesitation, she took a bite, and savored the simple meal. After all, no matter how many times she would have it in the future, it would never taste like Luca's.
Noticing that he didn't have a plate, she frowned slightly. “Aren't you going to eat?”
“I'm not hungry.” He replied with a shrug. “I also don't seem to have my powers, for some reason. I guess this really is a temporary thing.”
Jess couldn't imagine not having her powers, even in a situation like this. But she had what she wanted, which was him. Not his powers, not his appetite. Just Luca. His powers never were who he was.
Figuring they needed a happier topic, she joked. “Well, you already have power over me. That should be enough.”
“It will have to be.” He told her with a small smile, leaning back on the pillow as she continued to eat. “By the way, did you not learn anything from me? The kitchen was almost as messy as your bedroom.”
“Which you managed to clean quietly, I noticed.” She said, motioning to the clear floor. There used to be papers, clothes, empty food cartons and chip bags, but now it was bare. Wasn't her carpet supposed to be white? She would have to vacuum it later. “Thank you.” She couldn't think of a time that it had been clean since he died, which was something she was going to have to learn to deal with. “What else did you do while I was asleep?”
He let out a huff of laughter, trying to think of an answer for her. “Lived, breathed, existed. I did see Bobby, though. She's not handling everything well.”
“And I'm sure seeing you didn't help matters.” She told him, wishing she knew what she could do for her. But how could she possibly comfort someone when she was just as much of a mess over the same situation? If she didn't have the answers for herself, she would never have the answers for Bobby.
“I told her that she was strong, and that if anyone could get through this, than it was her.” Jess nodded at Luca's statement, knowing it was true. She had come to rely on Bobby over those past few months, and for Jess to rely on someone other than Luca was saying something about the teenager. Though Bobby didn't see it, Jess was confident that she would be able to come out of this stronger.
“Losing you is probably the hardest thing for her to face, though.” She told him, as she set aside her plate, and curled back up to where she belonged, and right back in his arms.
Luca brushed back some of her hair, and kissed the top of her head. “I'm nothing important.” He told her softly. His words made her let out a frustrated sigh. There was nothing true in them, and if anything bothered her more, it was hearing lies. She sat up, and adjusted herself so she was sitting on his lap, and looking into his eyes.
“Luca,” She started. “You know I hate it when you lie.” Before he could speak, she sealed his lips in a kiss.
The rest of the afternoon was simple. They only needed to be with each other, and Jess was realizing that on that Christmas, she and Luca would finally be able to have that final day they wanted, and the day she regretted they didn't have. A day without fights and harsh words. They could focus on the parts of their relationship that had always worked, and would have eventually let everything else work itself out. Jess knew deep down that their break-up would only have been temporary, because living without him for those past few months had been the hardest thing she faced.
The hammock that they shared swayed gently from the ocean breeze as the sun slowly began to set. They hadn't spoken much since they got there, and they never really needed to. If there was one thing they enjoyed, it was the silent moments where they could be together. While Jess liked talking, nothing compared to simply lying next to each other, listening to each other breath, and hearing Luca's heartbeat against her ear.
The sun slowly sunk into the horizon, and her heart sunk with it. It was only a sign that the end of the day was coming soon. There was so much that hadn't been said yet, and she wondered if all of it would be said. Perhaps he already knew how she felt, but she wanted to say it. “I love you.” She said softly.
“I love you more.” He replied automatically, his gaze fixed on the ocean as his fingers gently laced themselves in her hair. She would have fought him on that claim, but fighting was the last thing she wanted to do. Instead, she reached up for her necklace, and took those wedding bands in her hand. Channeling her power of phasing, she made them pass through the chain of the necklace with ease, freeing them.
Her mind drifted to when she and Luca exchanged those rings on their wedding day. In that one moment, they had the whole future in front of them. But because of one man's selfishness and greed for power, it was all taken away. She reached for his left hand, and without a word, she placed his wedding band right where it belonged. After a moment, she quietly asked. “Are you mad at Alec for what he did?”
Luca could only stare at the ring with an odd mix of joy, sadness, and longing. He wished he could live the life they had mapped out for themselves, and make Jess happy. But at the same time, there was nothing he could do about it. Taking Jess's wedding band out of her hand, he placed hers on her ring finger, before holding that hand with his own. “He's not worth it.” He told her. “As much as I wish it didn't happen, he only feeds on anger. To show him that emotion would only make him happy.” He concluded, before kissing her head once more.
Jess pondered his words, thinking about all the heartbreak Alec had caused her. His evil deeds had gone on unpunished, but there never seemed to be a way to finally be rid of him. Him being trapped in an illusion that Noah, and the rest of the guides, put him in, it seemed to be the only thing that made her feel better. But only slightly. “It's not fair.” She told him, just like she had told her parents when she accidentally summoned them. “We deserved to be happy. We deserved a break.”
“I know.” He told her. “But we were happy. For just a while. There was never a guarantee on how long that would last.”
Jess kept her gaze on the ocean, pondering his words. In a way, he was right, but deep down, she wanted more. She had Luca for such a short time, and part of her wasn't ready to lose him.
Luca prepared an impromptu dinner for Jess and Bobby (making sure it was vegan, of course). It was a normal night, with no mention of death, or the short time Luca had there. Jess and Bobby were treasuring the gift they had with him being there, and no matter what happened, the day would be perfect. After dinner, they played a card game together, which Bobby managed to win by the skin of her teeth. Jess or Luca didn't mind, though. There were more important things in the world for them to worry about.
Jess memorized every detail of that last intimate moment together. The way he touched with more love than she could ever realize. The soft whispers she heard in her ear. The way he kissed her at just the right time. Things with the two of them simply clicked on their own. They knew each other better than anyone else ever could, and the love they shared made it all so much more than anything either of them experienced with anyone else.
Before Jess knew it, it was 11:50 PM.
They stared at each other, laying side by side. If there was a way for Luca to go, this was probably the best way. The day had been a whirlwind of joy, and one she would never forget. Just like she couldn't forget the last day of his life, she would never forget their last day together.
“There's something I need to tell you.” She said softly, before taking a deep breath. It had been a speech she had gone over in her head a million times, and now she would finally be able to tell him. “I never meant a word of what I told you that day. I couldn't imagine leaving you for long. I know I would have forgiven you eventually simply because I'm lost without you. I couldn't have chosen to live like this.” A tear trickled down her cheek, and her voice began to crack. Why did he have to go? Why did this have to be goodbye? She wished that there was a magical way to trick The Powers That Be, but even she knew nothing got past them.
Luca reached up and gently wiped away the tears that were slipping out. The look in his eyes was one of heartbreak over the sight of her devastation, and the knowledge that there was nothing either of them could do to stop it.
“I'm sorry about all the pain I caused you. While I was alive, and now.” He told her sadly. There was no way he could fix past regrets, no matter how much he wanted to. He wouldn't have the rest of her life to make up for it all, but he was sure going to try in the next few minutes. “All I wanted was to make you happy, but I don't think I did it right in the end.”
“I know.” She told him. “But, Luca, I was happy. I was more happy than you know. We all make mistakes, and I forgive you for yours.” They all seemed like small mistakes now, even if they weren't. Jess knew that she had every right to be mad at him before, but it didn't change the fact that she was able to forgive him.
“You truly are the most amazing woman I've ever met.” He said incredulously, just like he had when Jess first really fell in love with him in Tokyo. Somethings never changed, including how she felt about herself, but she didn't tell him that. “I love you.” He whispered one more time.
“I love you more.” She told him, before leaning forward the short distance so they could share their last kiss. It was the kiss she would hold in her heart for the rest of her life, and each time she thought of it, she would think of that perfect moment. For the first time, she was able to accept that death she feared for Luca. They were truly happy, which was the way both of them wanted it.
The clock hit the twelve o'clock mark, and Jess pulled away. Slowly, her husband faded away from view without a sound, leaving nothing in his wake but the wedding band that she had placed on his finger.